My Friend’s mother is at the same sort of stage as you. She was given a negative prognosis, was dis-heartened and lost a lot of fight. This has heavily impacted her as she has just completed chemo but has had massive muscle atrophy(sp) due to not pushing herself to eat and having large problems with her nerve control so not able to exercise.
She has now had good results from her latest scan and is now going for radiotherapy. The problem is that she has lost so much control and mobility that everything is very hard and she needs constant care, wheelchair etc. She is now getting the fight back.
Please please do not lose the fighting spirit; not for the reasons of putting a brave face on and performing for others but to give yourself the greatest chance of successfully fighting cancer and being in the best position possible at all times. You will benefit from all the fight you can throw at it, of this I promise to a stranger.
Another story for you, I am sure you have heard millions. My aunt was on holiday and collapsed with a brain tumour. She was stabilised and sent home for urgent surgery. Over the time of a year her hair covered most of the massive operation scars and she got back into life. Then one year later she is at the dentist and they ask that she urgently goes her GP. Turned out she had very serious throat cancer. My aunt simply dealt with this as we all fell apart. She got herself to all appointments and kept herself eating as best she could.
She has now had a number of very large surgeries and radiotherapy (can’t remember if she had Chemo). She has trained herself to speak with what is left of her voice box and speaks well. She has no teeth and serious issues with her jaw as so much bone etc had to be removed. She can only take food blended and relies a lot on protein and energy shakes.
Yet still, there she was at the xmas meal smiling and enjoying the day, same as when we meet up. She has the all clear for cancer but many lingering issues. Somehow she doesnt complain to us, she is probably the only one that has a great understanding of life and she is my hero. I believe to this day that her pro-active attitude and inner fight was a major part of her recovery.
Fight it. Try to express your love to people and don’t beat yourself up should you lash out as you are no doubt on a rollercoaster. They will understand so don’t wallow in the dips. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start throwing more punches everytime.
