MyHermes: Divide by Zero

I will ask the parcel to be returned to sender.

Narrator: “The subsequent investigation proved the gap in the space time continuum we have all experienced started with this event”

I am loving this! Marvellous work yourguitarhero, marvellous. 😀

delivered within 5 working days.

Have you got the tracking info for this?? Cheeky bastards – all those delays, then they still give themselves 5 days to deliver!!

Am i the only one thinking this is going to end with “you broke or terms of service, we have your soul, now you must work for us until we see fit to discharge you” “congratulations, you discovered and passed the my Hermes interview process”

I think this is all one of those covert MI6 employment tests. If you can decipher the inner workings of MyHermes, and actually get a resolution, then geopolitics of states on the edge of civil war should be a piece of piss.

I like that it’s goodwill to refund the postage cost, how can it be goodwill when they failed to deliver the service you paid for, that’s a refund you are fully entitled to.

Sounds like a very dodgy driver, I wonder how much they are losing through his route?

I will ask the parcel to be returned to sender.

Nice touch

This is one of my all time favourite threads

*looking forward* to putting in a complaint after all this reaches its resolution (though, that may never happen in this geological epoch)

This is the best advent calendar ever! 😆

I like the idea of us sending parcels to your (full of expensive things..).

Also, did you not get a funny look from the staff at the shop you dropped the parcel at? Surely they would have seen the address is (probably) a 5 minute walk away..

I think the delivery driver knows you personally, been playing away by any chance? 😉

My Henning Kjaernulf teak coffee table is now officially lost and probably being burnt on the bonfire in some chav’s backgarden 😐

i didn’t expect it to turn up, after all if your last drop of the day involved the M25 and south circular at about 5pm and it’s your van/diesel it’s not surprising they couldn’t be arsed to deliver it.

Been following this one since the beginning. Did a few Google searches on myHermes to see if this thread was showing up on the front page. Alas it wasn’t. I did find this link on the Guardian which was an interesting read about being a myHermes courier.

https://www.theguardian.com/money/2016/jul/18/life-as-a-hermes-driver-they-offload-all-the-risk-on-to-the-courier

Still no update to the tracking. Disappointing.

Can’t help but think that the OP’s actions could have triggered the beginning of the end.

no mention of the money you can make by stealing the parcels though.
so many incidences of “your parcel has been delivered” but they have never even been to the property, what do you think happens to those parcels?

I bought a Burgtec stem recently (from STW actually) and after not receiving it for 2 weeks I contacted the seller. He check MH tracking and it had said that it was lost, so seller starts the claim route. Low and behold a few days later my stem arrives repackaged in a MH bag. I wonder if they chased the driver and he came clean..

Ooh tracking has updated this morning. Exciting.

05/12/2017 06:32 At the national sorting hub

I’d like to take this opportunity to option the movie rights for this thread.

How have they not noticed that the delivery address and the return to sender address are the same?

i have just filled in a ‘denial of receipt’ form for the sender of my stolen parcel, you have given me a glimmer of hope 😕

OP – I’m liking your persistence….

and

I will ask the parcel to be returned to sender.

This is getting even more interesting…..I reckon when this eventually concludes you could ‘sell the story’ and make some money !

Maybe, but what if he posted off the screenplay with Hermes?

Insure it for the value of the potential royalties, assuming it’s the next summer blockbuster.

My Hermes delivery driver has graduated from slinging parcels over my fence to putting them in my black rubbish bin.

I’m not sure if this is progress or not.

I was due a delivery yesterday.

Despite someone being in all day, they’re sorry they missed me. Not sorry enough to leave a card it would seem.

Chances on it arriving today……

This thread is ace. Waiting with bated breath. I’ve sent and received with my hermes in the past but will think twice next time.

Chances on it arriving today……

Nil

What do I win? 😆

SUPER EXCITED!!!!

This thread?

A friend just reported receiving a “you have a parcel” card from MyHermes with absolutely no information on it. Just a blank card… also in the Edinburgh area.

Had an Amazon delivery at 7pm on Sunday evening, and another right now. Even where there is no parking outside the house at this time.

X

Got excited that it was my Hermes guy

Meanwhile at the other end of the M8 it seems that any parcel with an ‘8’ in the addresses and ‘Bishopbriggs’ is getting left in my Alzheimer-suffering mums back garden regardless of with the intended recipient in the next street or over a mile away.

Thanks Yodel

Myhermes are now deleting things from the tracking record.

Apparently I’m due to receive my parcel today……

Yes, my complaint history was “revised” so that the item was delivered* and the complaint “resolved”

*didn’t mention it was delivered back to the sender

Anyway, been up since 4 waiting for my parcel. It’s like waiting for Santa when you’re wee

Found 2 empty Amazon boxes dumped in Hampshire for 2 addresses in Wiltshire – sent Amazon an email where I provided details / tracking numbers…..

Their email reply was “sorry your delivery was received in poor condition” FFS

The suspense of this thread is excruciating!

FWIW, I received a parcel via DPD on Monday and that’s still showing as out for delivery.

There must be a lot of middle managers in the courier business swearing a lot at this time of year!

We need to think bigger. Any volunteers?

In the mid-1960s, Australian athlete Reg Spiers found himself stranded in London with no money to buy a plane ticket home. Desperate to get back to Australia in time for his daughter’s birthday, he decided to post himself in a wooden crate.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-31700049