I used to own a sevice station.

My wife used to live next door to a petrol station run by Mr and Mrs Startup. It’s a dentist’s now.

I one got lost while trying to find a fireplace showroom as I took a wrong turn, but there was a handy side road and little traffic so I was able to turn round quickly and easily to get back on track.

You too? I did exactly the same thing, in Stoke of all places. 😯

Went to a customer today, they have spent the last two weeks demolishing a petrol station, and clearing the site ready for building.
I asked what it’s going to be, apparently it’s going to be a petrol station.

We started to run out of diesel in my van once when we were driving on the motorway. We turned off for the services and coasted to a stop one metre short of the pump.

Thanks for the reminder, I need to visit the petrol station on the way home but need to fill the tank with diesel otherwise it wont work properly.

i did a lego skills course once on a canal boat on the way to a petrol station, i was worried about lego building but by the end of the day i was expert and could jump over a piece of lego instead of landing on it

A woman once pulled into my sevice station with smoke billowing from the car & i thought, ‘good idea, cars on fire, pull in here’ but it turned out she’d driven 4 miles on a flat tyre.

I’ve read all these replies before having a shower.

I might do some tea in a bit if I can muster the enthusiasm

My canal boat is full of eels.

I haven’t got a canalboat suppose I could build one out of lego, but haven’t got any lego either:-(

I used to work as forecourt attendant in a service station. I once served Bob Crampsey with the more expensive of the two 3-star petrols on offer. He was not happy at having to pay a wee bit more than he was used to.

I’ve literally just been to the service station for some fuel on my way home from work.

I actually prefer to call it a petrol station.

I was catching the London train from Crewe station. It was very crowded; I found myself in a last-minute rush for the one remaining seat beside a tall, good-looking man with collar-length hair, it was the seventies; buckaroo! I looked up and saw it was none other than Peter Purves, it was the height of his Blue Peter career. He said, “You jammy bastard” and quick as a flash, I replied, “Don’t be blue, Peter!” Needless to say, I had the last laugh

Top Partridge!

I haven’t had a Curly Wurly in ages.

I’m always amazed that the people who staff our village petrol station spend so much time smoking on the forecourt.

I’ve never met Peter Purves but as I was walking in to M&S at lunchtime Peter Stringfellow was walking out. I can now legitimately claim to buy my smalls from the same establishment as Peter Stringfellow.

Konabunny … timing is everything … lol

I’ve just finished reading a really random thread that got me thinking- where the hell do you fill-up a canal boat?

I had a look in a boat on the Norfolk Broads the other day. It was very similar to a canal boat but wider and made of fibreglass. I may hire one next year. While we were looking at the boat the ladies and gents in the hire office were having a good look at our folding bikes and said they would be good for bombing around the yard on.

I’ve no idea if diesel is rated by stars or if its just good ol’ diesel.

It’s got a cetane rating, like petrol has octane.

What.T.F. is this thread about, it’s surreal 🙄

Sometimes, on a Friday, my only companion during office hours is a puppet called ‘Eisel’

He doesn’t say much.

I was skinny -dipping in a river on Skye today. The pebbles weren’t as sharp as lego. No way you’d have got a canal boat up there either. Well, not without a bloody big helicopter.

I saw those photo’s Col, nice arse!

I saw an MG Meastro today, H reg in blue. Made me think, how “cool” I thought they were in their day and how lame they are now.

Margerine is a terrible lubricant for cable car systems made out of Lego. It melts too quick then increases friction which melts Lego.

Lisa: Is there any point to this story?
Grandpa: Yes- I like stories

I Can’t Believe It’s Not Better

I have popped out for a quiet pint and while reading this thread my fellow patrons have started to look suspiciously in my direction as I am chuckling away.

Sometimes, on a Friday, my only companion during office hours is a puppet called ‘Eisel’

He doesn’t say much.

Oh yes he does, just not to you. I sometimes break into your office just to enjoy his witty banter.

A new lad joined my primary school in about the 3rd year back in the early 70s. His dad had bought the local petrol station. He drove the only Moskovitch I have ever seen in the UK. It was lime green

This thread is hurting my head. But it was aching beforehand.

I had carnation milk for the first time this millennium yesterday, it was not bought in a service station.

I filled up at a service station in Marshfield, near Bath. The free plastic gloves only had 4 fingers. I said to the cashier, “what kind of Mickey Mouse operation is this?”

One of the joys of eating asparagus is the resulting smelly wee.
Today I had a corned beef sandwich and now have corned beef smelling wee.

Fray Bentos is a town in Uruguay.

If it takes a fly a week to walk a fortnight, how long does it take to sandpaper an elephant down to a greyhound?

Yesterday I drove my mum and dad down to a nice fish restaurant overlooking a harbour in a local-ish fishing village. The food was excellent and despite being on cycle four of her chemo my mum managed the stairs (although getting down again was more challenging).
Afterwards, as we were only 10 miles away, I took them in past to see their ex daughter in law who they hadn’t seen in years. They had a good chin wag catching up.
On the way back my dad fell asleep in the back. They’re both in their eighties, bless them, they did well.
It was a hundred mile round trip all in all for me so I had to fill up first at the service station.

Mmmmm cevice, had some amazing in Lima on our honeymoon