Relationships that never happened

twice.

The lovely Hanna, and the lovely Jay. 2 years apart but the same MO. I was young, naïve and totally inept.
I occasionally look back wistfully at the bloody obvious signs that I just missed at the time. I had no idea girls that looked like that could find me attractive.
Ho hum. I hope they ended up as happy as I am with whoever they found.

Too many to count.

The one I really kick myself about, a gorgeous girl called Alison a year younger than me when I was about 15. Met her at a disabled swimming club we helped at. I kept meaning to ask her out, but never worked up the courage (it was a few more years before I had my first girlfriend, and thinking about it I’m not sure I’ve ever “asked out” a girl, it’s kind of happened differently). Several years later on a trip home from uni somebody casually commented about her fancying me 🙁

Approached a really nice girl in a club and said ‘hi my names’. She replied ‘do I know you’? (ERM no) ‘well lets keep it that way’. Years later I saw her in the street and she gave a thin smile.

Oh what she missed out on!

When I was twenty two my eighteen year old nephew told me he was going out with a beautiful blonde 17 year old who was going to be a page 3 girl.
He said she was from up north I think but was being put up in a house or flat by the daily star who was waiting for her to to eighteen to then put her on page three. My first name is kelley, so my nephew then went on to say this blonde girl shared her flat/ house with another seventeen year waiting for her page 3 debut who had the same name as me and I should go on a double date with her, her friend and him that weekend.

I said no, as her being seventeen was too young for me. Any way apparently she went on to do well for herself and to date Jason statham and billy Zane.

I

Mister P – Member
But they rarely do David. I know, I’m currently in a 4 year dry spell. Although maybe I’m just an ugly bugger!

Get yourself on Tinder or Happen or such like. We had a mess about on her profile one night; men queuing up! Real eye opener. My brother met his last girlfriend on Tinder; she was sound to, not a complete weirdo.

Well, it sounds like it all worked out ok for you!

Me OTOH; with a low self esteem/lack of self confidence; I have to wait for a girl to make some sort of first move.

davidtaylforth – you need to MTFU and ask her…otherwise you’ll regret it

A couple of ‘shags’ I missed out on with girls I worked behind the bar with.

Diane – we got a take away after work and went back to her place to eat. Got the right signals but as I already had a girlfriend (Diane was well aware of this) my conscience got the better of me and nothing happened.

Louise – I still had the same girlfriend as above, and Louise also had a boyfriend (who she later married) but was known to put it about a bit. One night after closing we’d cleared up and were sat having a drink. I was getting some strong signals (for me to pick them up they must have been very blatant). I was just about to make a move and hopefully have her over the pool table when we were interupted by the landlords mum (who was staying on premise while the landlord was at his holiday home). That kinda spoiled the moment and such an oppertunity never did present itself again.

But the one girl I look back and think “what if?” was Tiffany. There was about 6 of us on a weekend long interview process for instructor positions at an outdoor center in the lakes. We just clicked, talked for hours into the night, there was definately something there. But we were both in relationships at the time and didn’t take it any further. This was in the days before mobile phones and e-mail (never mind facebooK) became ubiquitous and we quickly lost touch. Don’t even remember her surname, only that she was studying Physics at Nottingham University.

OMG! I can’t tell you happy I am that it’s not just me that is/was so naive…

Got one going on at the moment friend of my cus.

We all went out she came out to and literally threw herself at me, I have never had a girl come on to me EVER that strong before. She missed a taxi I walked her home stay up talking all night. Asked her out “no”!

Asked her out again “no”, got a lot going on with her family etc….

BUT
I’m going to the Isle of Mann TT next year, (2 weeks in a shared house) and who is coming along with my Cus 😉
If you can talk with someone for 6 hours there as got to be something there!……I hope 🙂

None spring to mind

I am not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing tbh

gail porter at the sony music year 2000 party ….

Oh that would be Andrea, lovely, lovely girl, beautiful, funny, intelligent, super nice. Had just got with the woman who I’d spend the next 10 years with, she had been going out with my flat mate & they’d split up, we had been spending a lot of time together & were pretty close. Then one drunken night out it happened, I fancied the pants off her & she went in to kiss me, I pulled out of the kiss out of loyalty to my gf.

I went to her wedding a couple of years. I’m currently single.

davidtaylforth – you need to MTFU and ask her…otherwise you’ll regret it

Hmm, I’m not sure what I need to ask her? She lives a fairly hectic life at the other end of the country. Perhaps just left best as is.

I think I need to sort my life out TBH.

so, so many it hurts…

Gemma, met her on New Years eve, she got wasted and passed out on me by a phone box, I had no idea where she lived and it was before mobile phones… being the gallant hero that i am I called a taxi and me and the taxi driver carried her into it – took her to my parents place, carried her out, left her on the living room floor, me the couch.

She woke up next day and could barely remember me, but the relationship happened, but I think she was with me because she felt she owed me? We were worlds apart, I worked in a warehouse, she was about to got to Oxford Uni.

She had a long pre-college back-packing trip to India. So off she went whilst I literally ticked off the days until her return on a piece of paper stuck to my bedroom wall!

I received a letter and a postcard, which hinted of meeting some guy who rode an elephant, (no word of a lie) and he was really spiritual, and was like a soul mate as they watched the sun go down,…. I kind of tried to blank it out….but she was trying to tell me what she ended up telling me on her return, this was on a walk up Clent hills, and she was acting like I was going to attack her or something, so her opinion of me was pretty low…sigh…she pretty much blanked me after that and didn’t want to see me when I had to collect a few things from her parents place,…so i left her a nice long letter airing my grievances.

Catherine – beautiful long-haired redhead at Uni – we got close a couple of times – cuddled up – but didn’t really get it together – and I loved her, Just was an absolute shy idiot. Even set her up with one of my friends because she seemed unhappy. He dumped her, I wouldn’t have. Met her 5 years ago – 25 years down the line – still beautiful – at a reunion. She asked questions that, when I was sober, I realised meant she had googled me. I could have done something then…
Might see her in 2 years time, but am now with someone I love – a beautiful long-haired redhead. Wonder if there is a connection?

On the other hand – there was someone I didn’t complete the deal with about 6 years ago at a conference, too pissed, bumped into her a year or so later, told her I regretted not making more of the opportunity, and 24 hrs later we were in bed and then three years of intermiitent joy, but a lot of hell followed. So yes, now I have the confidence to tell people I screwed up, and wish I’d got together with them, and have done so with good results. But be careful what you wish for…

that reminds me… Caroline…

Year below me at school, looked like a model, including the height, she really towered over people…

Years later I heard a rumour she quite liked me, she was in the pub, she was still towering over people, I just couldn’t summon up the balls to talk to her, just the height thing, really imposing, but she seemed like a lovely person…

she went out with a right nob around that time, who really fancied himself, I truly hope she ditched that fool…?

I took her out. It was a Friday night
I wore cologne to get the feeling right
We started making out, and she took off my pants
But then I turned on the TV

…. I met a really attractive girl in the pub, dark long hair, blue eyes, really stunning, and after lots of eye contact, we got chatting, she was with some mates, chaps and girls,… she lived kind of my way…so we all got in a taxi and they were first drop,….

Instead of saying would you like to go for a drink sometime etc…

I instead reached into my wallet and produced a jack of hearts card with my name and number on the back that I had produced before going out,…don’t frikkin’ ask?

Suffice it to say she looked at it like anyone would, with utter disbelief…and I never heard from her… I can only imagine the card was in reaction to being jilted previously and I was trying to be someone i was not!!

…. i met a woman in a dodgy club, we went back to hers, she had a couple of young kids, which i can live with…

we had sex but she insisted on biting me on the chest,…i insisted she shouldn’t….

…it wasn’t to be…

I said no, as her being seventeen was too young for me. Any way apparently she went on to do well for herself and to date Jason statham and billy Zane.

Sounds divine.

Julie, Julie, Julie…

Julie was a semi-regular up the pub where I worked and she helped out occasionally too…

She really was, almost certainly still is a lovely person and very attractive too, great personality, all that…

I viewed her as being well out of my league, she was in and out of relationships and seemed a bit of a free spirit,… she was a few years older than me too

Anyhow’s,… had a get together around my folks place when they were away with people from up the pub etc, and we ended up in bed, sex was great, but we both kind of new without saying it that it was just a FOOOK buddy type thing, we had it all over… in her parents kitchen, up the side of her parents house in her car down a dark lane…

Then it just stopped, I stopped working at the pub etc…

I’d have been like a lap dog if she’d wanted me though, and that’s not a good look for any man.

Used to see her occasionally, but not seen her now for years, heard a rumour she was with a guy who was very ill, not sure how that went…

Hoping i bump into her again someday just to catch up!

When I was young, lithe and could do way more pressups than I can now, living and working in Cardiff, there was a girl who was the spit of Kelly Brook at her finest, with all the curves to match…

She always used to stare at me across the vast open plan office, sigh in my vicinity, toss her hair, and wiggle her ass in my direction.

When I finally got around to talking to her, she was all flustered.

We hung out for a while~ went back to hers, but it was hardwired into my mind that she had a boyfriend, so I just couldn’t bring myself to make a move.

WTAF was I thinking?

**** you deep seated morals, **** you in your asses

That is the only story of this nature that I can think of off the top of my head.

god what a bunch of amateurs idiots you lot are, try living with yourself when you’ve turned down the offer of a threesome on two separate occasions, I can still hear the dulcet tones of “do you mind if ***** joins us” ringing in my ears today 😳

on the plus side I am due to marry the girl i first “noticed” when she was 8 & i was 12, only some 40 years later & after one or two “ships in the mist” occasions, we are finally together…. aaaah how sweet 🙂

Carolina – stunningly beautiful, wonderfully kind, parents loaded, was into me – I was a knob with an Italian infatuation. IDIOT! 🙄

There have been so, so many…

Laura. She was a friend of my brothers who he knew from school and 6/7 years younger than me. She was super cute and very smart.
She made several blatant passes at me (like convincing me to give her a lift home after a party – then suggesting she’d come back to mine for a drink or maybe breakfast) but I never took her up on it as I was in a crappy relationship at the time.
15+ years later she’s still hot, but living with another hot girl.

Caroline. a friend of my girlfriends at the time. again – super hot and a bit younger than me. We all went camping and I ended up in bed with her, but got rumbled by my girlfriend who went mental (we were all very drunk)
the following day I drove Caroline into to town to the shops, and she suggested we stopped off and went for a walk in a field to finish what we’d started the previous night. I turned her down as I wanted to try and salvage things with the girlfriend.

There have been quite a few others believe me…

Commuting: the MOST beautiful girl on her bike going the other way most days

Accidently sat next to her in the cinema at the dyfi one year.
Nearly fell off my bean bag when i noticed.
Had a little cry.

Probably on here. :s

Ahhh, it’s been a while now, but i still can’t get her out of my mind.
When I dream, it’s quite often about her!

I saw her in a pub one night, and then again later on, in a nearby night club.
Fortunately enough, we had a common friend, and he introduced us. You know how it is though, so noisy in a night club, and we could hardly hear each other, above the sub-bass. We talked for ages that night, and ended up going back to our friend’s house for a party. We talked all the way there, in the back of the car. It was going so well, and then whilst sat on the sofa, she told me that she really liked me. I couldn’t believe it. Anyway, I told her ditto, and then we played some records that we both really liked. I told her that the songs would make a good soundtrack for the story of our lives.

We had a little dance in the lounge, which got a bit smoochy, but we were too drunk to do much, and just fell asleep on the floor.

When I woke up, I had a stinking hangover, and went for a chunder in the bogs. It was then that my heart broke. I saw her all snuggled up in bed with my so-called ‘mate’. Was absolutely gutted.

I heard afterwards that she thought the ‘soundtrack to our lives’ line was a bit freaky, and that she had just wanted some rumpy pumpy. But then I’ve always had this romanticised view that my life should be like the lyrics from some beautiful song. I can be such a tosser sometimes!

A Polish woman I met on summer camp in the US in 2000 is still periodically in touch. In the decade-and-a-half since we last spent any significant amount of time together, we seem to have convinced ourselves that this was an important missed opportunity.

Although I think she has been dating Richard Gere on and off this year, so in reality I probably just missed an opportunity to disappoint someone different.

🙂

OrmanCheep’s post above ^^^ is essentially the lyrics of the Divine Comedy song, “Our Mutual Friend”. 🙂

Kryton57 – Member
I have in fact got this going on right now. I spotted this young lady 14 years ago, asked her out for lunch, befriended her and got to the point whereby I would visit her flat

I read this as beheaded, to be honest the rest of the thread got less interesting after that disappointment.

I’ve just found out (last night) that this has happened to me. This thread helped so much to out it in perspective. Australian girl I fancied the pants off here for uni exchange, the first time I met her I messaged my mate and drunkenly described her as ‘a vision from heaven’, loves to dance, sweetest girl I’ve ever met.

I was leaving to go to Turkey for a month a month ago so her and I and some friends went to a ceilidh on the night I left. We got a little tipsy, came back to mine and confessed our feelings for each other and things got very steamy (but nothing happened). I couldn’t believe it, it was just the most amazing thing to realise she felt the same.

Cue me leaving to cycle for a month in Turkey the next morning. Through the countryside, that night’s scene played over and over and over in my mind driving me crazy. She literally consumed 80% of my thought time some days with no one to talk to and no distractions.

Now I’ve reached the end and she messaged me saying her application to extend another semester fell through and she’s going home at new year.

I know it’s so stupid but I had my first wee cry in a long time last night. Felt like a teenager again! Now got 3 days in this strange Kurdish city to feel heartbroken.

Eugh!!!!! I wish i could find out she had some critical character flaw like being a massive racist or something to make it OK.

/rant

marmaduke – I think I saw her deliberately trip an old black lady over in the supermarket last week.

😉

Asked a lovely girl out in college called Rachel, she said she was flattered but no, she is now married to Nicky Wire.

Most awful attempt to impress someone, girl called Lucy worked in Nat West in Wantage, I went to open bank account, on the form it asked for your occupation. I hilariously put down “astronaut”

She took the form went through it, looked at me with disdain and said “you are not an astronaut” was like an iceberg after that.

Eugh!!!!! I wish i could find out she had some critical character flaw like being a massive racist or something to make it OK.

Where was she from again?

Jimmy… He’s engaged, with a kid now…****

I know STW has more male than female posters – but it does seem interesting that almost all the stories on this thread are from blokes.
Are we just shit at understanding and talking to women?

Are we just shit at understanding and talking to women?

Only when I fancy them. Most of my friends are female and I can talk to them about anything and everything (think mumsnet-style topics ) but the second either of my brains go ‘Ooh, she’s lovely!’ I go to pieces. Not in the adorable way either 😥

Stoatsbrother – yes.

Whathaveisaidnow – I can see why the Wedding Present are the band for you.

For my story.

When we left University a mate of mine went to France to teach english to french kids for a year. A group of us arranged to visit him at new year; he and a group of older students (18/19 year olds, we were 21/22) rented a gite near Boulogne and we had a massive party. We were supposed to be met off the boat by one of the french kids to show us where the gite was, but we waited and waited in the car and no-one arrived. With no mobiles at the time, we were lost and starting to get a bit pissed off (f’in french, etc.) when this stereotypical Renault 5 roared into the car park, and this vision climbed out. She -Frederique – had a mass of auburn hair, looked like Briana Corrigan out of the Beautiful South, and had the most amazing body and bum in these faded and torn Levis. We were instantly besotted, and the lateness was forgiven. When she kissed me in welcome, she smelt divine….

Nothing happened – she had a boyfriend although a few of the boys copped off with other french girls and comparing notes on the boat home, consensus was that french girls were substantially more experienced and proficient than english girls of a similar age……

Shit story so far…… but get the Bombers ready.

A few years later, a group of us went ski-ing to Andorra, including the TEFL mate who’d stayed in touch with his old french mates – including Fred who having studied languages was now working at the French embassy in Madrid. A 6 hour train ride from where we were skiing…..

She came up on the Friday evening late. We were going back home early hours of sunday am. We skied all day with her (she was french and hence brilliant, and the ski pants she wore confirmed previous impressions of her derriere.) We had a massive piss-up, playing stupid drinking games and ending up in a club, when she indicated she was heading back to the appartment. And she’d like me – specifically me – to walk her back.

Well dear friends. I bottled it. I was single, so no worries there, but she was clearly Premier League (nay – Champions League) and I was GM Vauxhall Conference. I still to this day can’t fathom it. My mates left us for a suitable time (given her fitness and the apparent smuttiness of the french girls in honesty they left me about 36x as much time as I’d have needed) and then came back to find us drinking red wine and eating left over muesli.

I met her one last time in Madrid but she was coupled up again by then – and I’m now happily married with two super kids. But not to someone that looks like Briana Corrigan, closer to Joe Corrigan. (I hope she never reads this )

Fortunately, my mates don’t go on about it over and over again, every time we meet. And i still haven’t found out who gifted me a bottle of red wine and a box of muesli on my wedding day.

Bon – fetchez les Bombeurs

Are we just shit at understanding and talking to women?

(Generalising) Typically, chaps are socialized to “make the first move” whereas women are not.
(Generalising) Typically (I think) women are very sensitive to whether other people are sexually interested in them – partly because they become conscious of being objectified much younger, and partly because the risks of them being oblivious are much greater.

I think that means that it is relatively rare for a woman to be on the receiving end of a pass from a guy that she doesn’t realise is one until he’s gone – usually they’ll see it coming a mile off, and if you’re being ignored it’s because she isn’t interested.

Women have far more “he was really persistent and couldn’t understand that I didn’t like him” stories. They also (presumably) have far more “I think he liked me but he never said anything, and then I started dating someone who actually asked me out” stories.

What they don’t have are these “She asked me to join her and her hot friend in the shower, but I didn’t because I didn’t realise until the following month that this was a surprisingly forward offer of a wild threesome, by which time the moment had passed” tales which we’re all having such a good chuckle-cringe over.

🙂