Xmas presents you're "expected" to buy for others

Oh dear … the missus came home recently with a friend’s Myakka catalogue and now she’s added a whole load of “I’d like that … and those … and also those” to her wish demand list.

The latest additions being 8 x replacement cushions for our dining chairs at £30 each. WTF do you need to spend that much on cushions that get splattered in food by kids and everyone else? And these are expected to be part of the stocking fillers!

I’m sure this is going to come out wrong, because the gist is that I’m all for spending money and getting the best we can, but I do get the hump when she wants stuff that I see as unnecessarily extravagant. I don’t like saying that, but sometimes I feel that she sees something she likes (that happens to be OTT expensive) and just has to have it.

Anyone else expected to do the same?

EDIT: and before anyone says “But you buy MTB stuff, and outdoor stuff, etc … Sure, but I use the damn stuff – I don’t just have it sat around doing nothing.”

Well, if MrFC ever gave me 8 dining-chair cushions for Christmas he’d be out the door.

My wife says that about pretty much everything I have in the garages. And I do use it all. She doesn’t though so I suppose I can see her point….

I was thinking similar FC

if I was to give the missus a cushion [or 8] for Christmas, I suspect I’d be eating them for lunch

your wife has killed the spirit of christmas

it will be her fault if rudolf can’t fly anymore on christmas eve

Buy her a new bike, but in your size.

Believe me, cushions (especially ones that cost thirty f&*king quid each) wouldn’t be top of my giving list either. But if that’s what she wants …

SM – she’s been “had” by stupid consumerism. Have words.

SM – she’s been “had” by stupid consumerism. Have words.

Bloody right mate. Not sure what good it’ll do mind.

Blimey, if you can afford £240 on a few scatter cushions, life can’t be that bad – chin up!

get her the cushions for xmas and f*** all else!

Blimey, if you can afford £240 on a few scatter cushions, life can’t be that bad – chin up!

That’s my point entirely because I don’t see the sense in spending that kind of money on a bunch of cushions. There are more important things it could be going on.

Well, if MrFC ever gave me 8 dining-chair cushions for Christmas he’d be out the door.

You’re a garden tools sort of girl then?

This year we are so skint we have set each other a £10 limit.

I empathise.

I had a similar situation this time last year with my now ex-girlfriend. She had a list prepared well in advance so I diligently (though stupidly, as it turned out) procured near enough everything she’d asked for…cashmere lined leather gloves, that movie about Coco Chanel, a book/CD about Trojan Records, Lord of the Rings graphic novel, a swanky make-up bag and a £100 voucher for Office so she could indulge her Imelda Marcos tendencies.

On December 21st she split with me. It was too late to return what I’d bought for her, so some of it went on eBay and a few things were regifted to friends. I put the voucher towards a new pair of Timberland boots for me, so it wasn’t a total write-off!

It ruined Christmas for me though and has made me a whole lot more cynical about the whole gift buying thing. Hilariously, she wants to get back together with me now. The look on her face when I informed her that my new (upgraded) girlfriend would probably object was priceless.

two points Harry
1. FC is much more a domestic appliance kinda gal iron that sort of thing
2.This year we are so skint we have set each other a £10 limit.
Please tell me you did not believe her when she said this – beginners mistake- that is just so you can surprise her.She is expecting more.

I bought the misses a Dualit toaster one year. She went nuts! 😆

QUOTE: Junkyard – Member
2.This year we are so skint we have set each other a £10 limit.
Please tell me you did not believe her when she said this – beginners mistake- that is just so you can surprise her.She is expecting more.
UNQUOTE.

I was thinking the same!

Sounds like a classic ambush to me. Buy her an AA road atlas and a bottle of Castrol GTX, the wrap them exquisitely.

Watch the resulting indoor fireworks for a bit before breaking out the real presents.

I lady at my work was going nuts the other morning as she got a new Leaf blower for the birthday!! I commented that they are a handy bit of kit at this time of year 😆

Ah, a perennial problem, requires delicate footwork tippy-toeing around all the hidden traps:

Can we see pics of these cushions please?

Thirty quid each? Why not get I think it’s Bunnyhop off here, to do you some instead? I’m sure they’ll be cheaper, and totally exclusive! And you’ll be supporting a small British business. Seriously.

Show your muissus this thread. Make her see sense, hopefully.

Oi, Spacemonkey’ s missus; No! Get some cheaper (yet still perfectly good) cushions, and spend the rest on a nice meal or weekend away or something nice.

Or you could make a poor little Elfin very happy, by buying him an X-Box…. 😥

This year we are so skint we have set each other a £10 limit.

Tis true! Well, almost.

We did spend £400 on a Green Man sculpture for the garden as a present to each other in the summer. The tenner gift is just a bonus. I have asked for inner tubes, she is getting a DVD.

My extended family are prolific shoppers, you know they go off arm in arm on weekend expiditions, they have everything. Ive been at their houses at Christmas and theyve been at each others throats because the gifts weren’t the correct spec. So #### them this year.

Easy way to get around being guilt-tripped into expensive/unnecessary present buying, is to point out that if you have to buy this or that, you won’t be able to afford A or B later on – and pick things you know she wants to do, etc.
Mine works like this for buying a car for her – we won’t be able to afford to go on holiday next year, which I know she really does want to do, so i get to win that one…

everyone’s broke so £10 limit on all family presents 🙂 mrsconsequence i cant resist splashing out on ( 😉 stifle those naughty thoughts gents) and i always end up spending much more than i planned… problem is she’s so easy to buy for.. anything that would make a 4 year old child happy is perfect, and luckily she’s weird and likes “practical presents” too, so buying things like kitchen utensils is welcomed.

makes her feel less guilty for buying me a potato peeler (even though we already had two.. and i didnt want a potato peeler) because she was fed up with the other ones. i dont think she’s bothering with presents for me this year cos i dont like “stuff” and anything i need i buy for myself.

We always have a limit [£20 last & this year] there’s 6 of us here so everyone gets 5 presents
We don’t do or get anything other than cards from the extended family

The youngest one doesn’t have his own income so we give him the money & the other 3 get half of it as they’re whinging students

i hope you bought the students some soap and a haircut!?

pesky students

Mrs Yoshimi asked me what I fancied for Christmas, I sent her a link to Great Rock…..fingers crossed 😀

She on the other hand is very hard to buy for, often saying- “there’s not really any thing I want” 😕

My (extended) family just all agreed to stop buying Christmas presents a few years ago apart from for the kids. Makes it much easier and means I don’t get Simpsons socks and other useless crap :p

Last night MrsT asked me what I wanted… I uhmed and ah’d about it for five minutes and said I would let her know when I thought of something. Then she sat there looking at me expectantly until I realised the game being played and surrendered by asking ‘… and what would you like darling?’

‘Satnav’. Less than a 1ms response time. I am like a harp to this woman, I can’t go anywhere and she can play me at will.

Mrs is off to NYC in January with some cash. Kids are getting a few things as usual but best off all I’m off for 2 weeks over Xmas and that is the best present.

Another one here with limits, not decided what it is yet, but will be around £40 on each other – this is because we have some 15 children (plus ours on top) to buy for (immediate family and very close friends).

If I had my way they would get an orange, a clip round the ear and be happy for that.

Mrs Mitch has aked for a pair of those arse toning trainers, which I have reluctantly agreed to get her. I just dont understand why she feels she needs them, as (and I know I’m biased) I think her back end is a thing of wonder and delight.

Arse toning trainers ? Do you have to wear them, or put them in a bowl under your bed maybe ?

I think they’re made by Reebok, and the soles are curved or something, which supposedly tones your buttocks as you walk. I know, I know…

Asking for presents is rubbish, if people know exactly what they want they can buy it themselves. I think the point of presents is the thought that goes into them and the (hopefully) pleasant surprise on receiving. If my GF asked me for anything she wouldn’t get it, but luckily she’s not that mercenary 😀

Back in August (yes, august) my sister sent a e-mail around the family, and in short she said “Amazon tokens, i want a Kindle….”. Now this is the person who in recent years has given second hand presents at Xmas pleading poverty, her husband is a tight fisted prick of a solicitor, and she currently doesn’t make enough of an effort to work.

At the time I was waiting on an MRI scan result that would make a decision whether I’d need chemo or maybe further brain surgery, so I didn’t even know if I would be in employment, my sick pay entitlement was due to end imminently anyway, and I e-mailed her to tell her I had other priorities. Oddly she’s managed to buy a Kindle herself, and my scan was fine, so I’m back on full time pay, and she’ll probably get an Amazon voucher from me for an e-book, however at the time it was just her typical blinkered “me, me, me” manner. I’ve got used to it over the last 40 years fortunately.

Spongebob – Member
I bought the misses a Dualit toaster one year. She went nuts!

Donkeys years ago my dad bought my mum a deep fat fryer, the old Tefal type, but put a bottle of Chanel No 5 inside it. Mother freaked on opening it, when she found the perfume she went even more ballistic and emptied it over the contents of his wardrobe! Mega Xmas that one was………

“Asking for presents is rubbish, if people know exactly what they want they can buy it themselves. I think the point of presents is the thought that goes into them and the (hopefully) pleasant surprise on receiving. “

Totally agree with this. Also its the effort people put in to select the right thing or make it or source it. Its not about cost its about care and interest.

I don’t really understand this ‘list of things I expect to be given’ stuff, I find it horrid and would not dream of giving anyone a list of items they were supposed to fork out for.

Bizarre too is the “I want this exact object, now wrap it for me so I can be ‘surprised’ on the day” but loads of people seem to do this insane pretence. Its just a nuts form of lying. “Oh what a surprise, just what I hoped for!”

I bought the misses a Dualit toaster one year. She went nuts!

Nice.

I bought her a waterproof/sick-proof/dog-proof boot liner for her Freelander a couple of Xmas’ ago. She did ask for it though 🙂

EDIT: practicality and functionality is where it’s at these days!

Good thinking Elfin, I’ll give the Bunnyhop girls a PM. If the cushions don’t work out I can always buy a handbag off them. It’s not like her ladyship couldn’t find a use for yet another one 🙂