[Closed] Mates and their ex GF's...

The latter.

Get the hell on with it, life is too short.
Just try not to think of her having filthy monkey s3x with him tho...

Pics?

Get stuck in, split up a year ago is not 'that recently' IMHO

2004 ?!?!?!? 😯 get in there

+1 for the life's too short. Enjoy the s3x.

crack on.

Or should I just stop analysing and get the hell on with it?

This, then afterwards 'compare notes' with your mate over a pint or two...

Ask them both round for an audition?

are you sure she doesnt want to get with you so she can get near her ex again?
(in a bunny boiler kind of way )

hang on...3some with both, take a video and send to your mates... 8)

Pics?

No chance fella, though in the case of both if I did, you'd probably be impressed...

OK anyway, taking the hint... To be fair I might have the wrong end of the stick totally anyway, they may be interested in meeting up for other reasons, as both live fairly locally to me now.

This, then afterwards 'compare notes' with your mate over a pint or two...

Errrr yeah, NOT gonna happen...

Just try not to think of her having filthy monkey s3x with him tho...

See this might be the problem, he was quite forthcoming about many of his sexual conquests with her, which though I'm far from a prude at all, I do worry if anything did happen, I'd suddenly start getting the mental image of them together doing the bedroom tango in many different positions... 😯

If the best mate did the dumping then it's not so bad so crack on!

are you sure she doesnt want to get with you so she can get near her ex again?
(in a bunny boiler kind of way )

I know what you mean, but who says she even wants to get with me...? I know she wants to meet up, but that's it...

So meet up and find out what's what

Two women have sent you their phone numbers and you think there's a problem??

Boot filling time methinks 😉

PMSL Woody

One of them rides bikes too...

I can;t honestly believe you are even thinking about this...

I can;t honestly believe you are even thinking about this...

Been on the other end, it's not nice when your mates don't respect your feelings...

That said, in both these cases I suppose if the boot was on the other foot, I'd be telling any mate to go ahead too...

Anyway, cheers all, don't feel so bad now 😀

First one, yes.
Second one, check with mate concerned. Can't see it being a problem but you never know.

wot he said above but 12 mths on and he is living with someone else seriously WTF has it got to do with him, I would probably mention it though to see what they thought.

Are you happy to be compared with your mates in the conjucal sense if so then my boy it is time to sow some oats.

Pigface, I fear you're already looking too far forward... But yeah, no worries in that respect, I've got no shame! 😉

Can you get a reference from your mates? They broke up for a reason, best to have some backround. Also you'll get to know exactly what they like in bed. Knowledge is power

But thinking about it, I wouldn't want to go where my mates had already been apart from to swap notes in the pub afterwards

WTF are you playing at! Stop fannying around and dip your ferkin bread!

I lost what would have been a very good friend for life doing this sort of thing, but then again in hindsight 3 days after they broke up to get in her knickers might have been a little soon 😯 ! She was hot though!

quote]WTF are you playing at! Stop fannying around and dip your ferkin bread!

This one.

Been on the other end of this, and at the end of it they are available and so are you. done!

[img] [/img][

But thinking about it, I wouldn't want to go where my mates had already been apart from to swap notes in the pub afterwards

I agree with everyone in this thread apart from this guy, who I hope never to find myself in a pub with.

Go for the first one, check with the mate RE the second. If you don't talk to your mate, think about how you'd feel if you lost him as a friend. If that's an acceptable loss; crack on.

2004 one no problem, the more recent one, I'd be a bit careful.

BOTH have expressed interest in meeting up... And both sent me their phone numbers...

They're both probably hoping you can do the GBF duties and help them get back with the other guys.

But thinking about it, I wouldn't want to go where my mates had already been apart from to swap notes in the pub afterwards

Hmmm, see what you're saying but you can't change the past. What about all the other guys she's been with - would that bother you too, or is that just fine because they were not mates? All girls have history and personally I'd rather go with someone who's been around a little and 'knows her stuff' than a 'I'll wait until I'm married' wet blanket type.

Honestly life is too short to worry about stuff like this. Get in there I say, enjoy yourself and if things go tits up who cares, at least you can have a good laugh about it afterwards.

Ohh sod it - since no-one lese has said it...

Mates and their ex GF's what?

worying about nothin, it might not even come to nothing so you'd look a bt daft getting your friends blessing only to find she wanted to catch up on some gossip.

Just crack on, if things pan out cross that bridge when you come to it.

There are 3.5billion women in the world, move on!

Car's and girlfriends are things you should definately never ever ever EVER take 2nd hand off a mate.

Car's

Tap them and move on.

Perhaps come back for seconds.

You've landed two local sex buddies. Hide the sausage time fella. Allez!

Spoon - that's the biggest crock of poo you've ever written... IIRC mboy comes from the Forest of Dean... even his Dad's ex could be on the menu.

mboy's not from FoD, though I know what you mean. I am, and the good thing for me is that if I break up with my wife at least she's still my sister...

2004 is fair game IMO Mark, 12 monther and I'd be just checking with my mate that 'break-up-sex' isn't still on their menu 😉

Mate of mine dated another mates ex and they haven't spoken to each other since. He split up with her 25 years ago.!!! 25 ****in years and they fell out over it.

One word:

FINGERBANG

psling - have you not got a sister that mboy could have then? An ugly one will do as long as she's gentle with our delicate little flower.

Whats up with mastile's? Hes getting all hot and bothered for some reason. ;o)

Oh, and shouldn't this thread be in the 'Bike' forum?

cynic-al - Member
One word:

FINGERBANG

s'2 words innit?

chakaping - Member

But thinking about it, I wouldn't want to go where my mates had already been apart from to swap notes in the pub afterwards

I agree with everyone in this thread apart from this guy, who I hope never to find myself in a pub with.

ur into sloppy seconds? 😯

we need photo's or she doesn't exist.

mboy,

1. what village do you live in?

2. is your sister next?

8)

As per usual, LOL @ TSY... A little knowledge is a dangerous thing, and you sir, as seems to be the norm, have VERY little knowledge! 😉

PMSL @ psling... Comedy genius!

And I'm with chakaping, hoping not to find myself in the pub discussing things with roketdog after! "The Lad Bible" might be high brow reading for some people I'm sure, but personally I'm a little more evolved than that...

what andrewh said.

I have never, ever fancied any of my close male friends' GFs. Somehow, going out with any of my mates instantly makes them unattractive to me. Not saying they are unattractive, just that I don't find them so.

I've fancied the GFs of blokes who are mates but not that close, or colleagues type thing. Someone you'd go for a pint with maybe but aren't that close to.

I don't think I'd ever end up with any of my close friend's GFs/wives. Cos I don't find them attractive, quite frankly. I've had mates' GFs hit on me, but never succumbed. Just wrong, in't it? You woon't want it done to you.

As for the 'sloppy seconds' thing; well, apart from it being a horrible expression, I think there is an element of 'territory' here. Dunno if it's a male thing or what, but I don't think I'd ever be comfortable with someone I knew had bin intimate with any of my close male friends. It would just feel wrong. Course, at my age, anyone I'm intimate with won't be 'pure and untouched', but I just think there's a natural taboo with close friends.

Was in a situation a while ago, a couple I knew split up and I spent time with each of them afterwards as they were both friends, trying to help them though it. Was always closer to the woman than the bloke tbh (he was a friend of a friend but a good bloke), and there was a moment when something could have happened between us, but it never did, and tbh I'm quite happy about that, cos if such a thing had ever become known to him, then I'm sure he'd feel proper devastated and utterly betrayed.

I think the expression 'don't poo on yer own doorstep' is quite an apt one here. You've got to consider the feelings of a friend. If it would mess them up and affect your friendship, then you have to consider that carefully. Lose a lifelong friend for a one-nighter? Is it worth it.

Course, this ain't a simple issue at all, extremely complex, no simple answer. Spose if two people are gonna be together, then that can't (and shoont) be stopped.

I know a mate of mine had a thing with an ex of mine, but I lost respect for him more that he wasn't open and honest about it. Din't have a problem with him seeing her; none of my business really tbh. Up to them. Had got to the point of mutual indifference with her anyway. He went down in my estimation, cos he din't act with a great deal of dignity. I'duv respected him far more if he'd just bin open about it.

Spose if someone left you then ended up with one of yer mates, that could be a bugger to deal with.

Sigh.

No simple answer really is there?

No-one's anyone else's 'property' though. Married or not, it's irrelevant. Everyone's ultimately their own person and belongs only to themselves.

That's actually rather sensible Elf.

I've been toying with a similar problem re contacting a mates ex-wife who wants to meet up. I haven't seen either of them for nearly 16 years and they've been divorced for 15. I feel a touch guilty as I don't think things were ever the same between them after I took him out for a drink and returned him a gibbering wreck who decorated the living room from floor to ceiling with kebab after I left 😳

On the other hand, she is absolutely delightful (or was last time I saw her) in all respects 😉

Woody, trust me you migh have been seen as a bad influence for a few weeks, but as soon as she was no longer with him, she'll have totally forgotten about you even getting him drunk I the first place!

And Elf does indeed make some sensible points, trouble is like I say, I've had my fingers burnt before, having been dumped then my ex ended up with someone I knew, only a couple of months later. But to be fair, theyre still together now, and I've managed to almost completely move on, and rebuild my friendships there too.

only time I did this me and the mate never spoke about it. Until, one day apopro nothing, he said - "she's a screamer, isn't she". Nothing more ever said.

She blimmin was, too...

I'm married to my mate's ex, and he was best man at the wedding.

I've managed to almost completely move on

Even an idiot could tell you that herein lies your problem.

Personally I don't think you actually want to move on, you've presented us with several opportunities on this forum all of which you've failed to take. If you like these girls and you think they've got potential to help you be happy... go for it, go for them both...

Yes/no/maybe TSY. For once you actually have a point, but I can assure you I've wanted to move on for 6 months, for 5 months nearly it wasn't happening but things have changed significantly in the last month for me for the better.

I'm certainly not averse to meeting new people if thats what you're angling at, far from it actually.

Jesus are they all munters these days @ Uni that you are relying on sloppy seconds from mates Eeeek!

one of my brothers mates went out with a mates girlfriend after he dumped her becasue she refused to take it up the wrong un. They married and now have kids. I often wonder how they explain to the kids how they met.

'ark at you lot!

Remember kids - these ladies were dumped for a reason! 😆

[img] [/img]

Nice comments guys 🙄

Sorry sueW i did not mean it in the usual "lad manner" used on here it was just an amusing story about dating a mates ex.

Thanks Junkyard - response much appreciated.

TBH I nearly didn't post anything as I just expected the usual flaming about 'no sense of humour' or 'it's your time of the month', but the last few posts were just a bit much.

Occassionally it's not particularly pleasant being a girl on STW 🙁

thisisnotaspoon - Member
There are 3.5billion women in the world, move on!

Car's and girlfriends are things you should definately never ever ever EVER take 2nd hand off a mate.

Especially when they tell you your mate's a better shag.

Occassionally it's not particularly pleasant[s] being a girl[/s] on STW

Occassionally it's not particularly pleasant being a girl on STW

TBH it's often embarrassing being a bloke on here...

Ignoring the idiots for a moment;

I think a lot of it boils down to individual ego and insecurity really, the mates going out with your ex type thing. If you can't have her, then another man shoon't speshly a mate! That type of mentality.

Which is indicative of emotional immaturity, and the inability to deal with rejection/ending of relationships. Very difficult for many people to accept a relationship is 'over'.

It helps to put distance between yourself and an ex. Physical, and especially mental. Not helpful if you still have feelings and they are in close proximity.

Car's and girlfriends are things you should definately never ever ever EVER take 2nd hand off a mate.

Women aren't material possessions like a car. They're people. When you can figure this out, you may gain a better understanding of life, and yourself, and be better off as a result.

TBH it's often embarrassing being a bloke on here...

TBH there are a couple of posts above which are a bit near the knuckle (I really thought references to back doors had died a natural self-regulating death) but it's been a fairly amusing light-hearted thread and I'm sure more input from a female perspective would have been appreciated and given a bit of balance.

Shame only emsz commented before it got a bit lad'ish.

Poor sensitive little lamb

Nah, just tired of dickhead comments that keyboard warriors woon't make in public, that's all. Thanks for your concern though, appreciated. 🙂

Have you thought about the following scenario...You are lying in bed having a post coital energy gel and the recently-split-up one snuggles up to you and tells you it was just like your mate....ONLY SMALLER...AND QUICKER

My mate asked me if he could date my ex. It was about 18 months after we split up, I told him to go for it. They had a couple of dates and then he told me she's hard work how did I ever manage 2 years with such a princess.

Women aren't material possessions like a car. They're people.

Everyday's a school day. Elfy this forum would be a worse place without you if only the 'dickhead... keyboard warriors' were left.

Through the headboard.

When in doubt PIIHB

Still not done anything mboy?

*shakes head sadly*

Poor sensitive little lamb

I'm sure more input from a female perspective would have been appreciated and given a bit of balance.

Yes I am sure your contribution has helped anyone who wants to speak out freely...who would not be encouraged by ridicule?

Eh!?

I think my contribution was self explanatory and I hardly think a good natured dig at Elf's self appointed status of 'monitor of good taste and discrimination' will have put off any women from commenting, in fact

I'm sure more input from a female perspective would have been appreciated and given a bit of balance.

Shame only emsz commented before it got a bit lad'ish.

I haven't felt obliged to apologise for any of [b]my[/b] comments BTW. 8)

Fairly typical degeneration tbh. Anything that involves women and relationships usually ends up with a bit of dick duelling over who can say the most childish thing.

My general rule of thumb is avoid your mate's ex partners. Friendship is more important than a quick ego boost.

I haven't felt obliged to apologise for any of my comments BTW.

Is that a dig yet?

I suspect you never had needed to apologise for anything you have ever done but I dont necessarily see this as a good thing ...it is possible you, just like eflin, are always right though but unlikey 8)

I am sure we can all see where this is going now and I am out

Can't imagine caring if the ex wasn't a long term relationship, and even so I would hope my reason and sense would overcome my initial feeling of irriation. +1 for the life's too short bunch.

ARGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

+1 for this also.

As for the degeneration into the depths that it has, I can only agree that it's a bit pathetic but wholely expected. And not limited to mainly-men forums - it works both ways. Shockingly it seems that there's a variation of views on all forums and with both sexes...