Would you park like this?

Also, is the petrol cap locked? If not, drain it!

Like your thinking daffy…. Middle of the road- at 90 degrees to the road. 🙂

Superglue wet and dry to the length of the wiper blades… shit in the air conditioning intake… pin prick coolant hose…

Yes

A full new thread with ‘as it happens’ pictures of the OP dismantling it down to a chassis on breeze-blocks would be lovely.

s this p***k still there??

Yep.

The kids are in the garden playing now. Remember when it used to be jumpers for goalposts 😆

Let’s see.

IIRC, parked adjacent to double yellows is still illegally parked, even if they’re not directly on the road.

If you’re in London, parking with wheels on the pavement is specifically illegal by bylaw.

Assuming no dropped kerb, they’ve had to drive across the pavement to get to your property. I’m sure dibble would be interested in someone doing that.

Parking on your property – trespass?

Of course, the real question is, why haven’t you built a fence around your property? Either before they turned up or after, either is good.

In fact they seem to want the hose on, frisbee, cricket set, RC helicopter, BMX bikes. It actually has pretty strong paint.

Watch a bit of Danny Macaskill and then go practice hopping on and off the roof.

oldgit – Member

In fact they seem to want the hose on, frisbee, cricket set, RC helicopter, BMX bikes. It actually has pretty strong paint.

pics or i am calling BS.

I’d defo block it in with a couple of your own vehicles, the owner will then have to speak with you to remove their vehicle.

As its parked on private land the Police effectively cannot do anything, my brother had a similar incident with a parent parking on his land to collect kids from school so he blocked them in.

Said parent came round and asked if he would move his car, he basically told them where to go and slammed the door in their face.

About 1.5hrs later he gets a knock on the door from some Bobbies ,he explained the situation about it being private land and how parents repeatedly parked there.

They politely asked if he would move his car and they would have a word with the school.

Some people are just ignorant d!cks.

As its parked on private land the Police effectively cannot do anything

Really?

Excellent. Next time I have to use the airport I’ll leave my car on someone’s driveway for a fortnight.

“Cook pass babtridge”?

Wut?

I bet they cancel ebay purchases too.

Hahahaha classic Jamie well done sir

Do you have a large tent?

GIYF (for those who don’t know me and don’t know you)

Holy crap! The bloke has left then parked the other way! Cheeky bastid!

Wee on all of the door handles. It’s the mature thing to do

If you’ve got a tin of condensed milk, use it to glue a sheet of newspaper right across the windscreen. Spray across it ‘suck it up, jackass’.

Break window release handbrake push

Ring the scrap yard, tell them to collect?

Moat!

I’m sure they’re not insured when parked on (your) private property. Burn and report with a very detailed address….. Should cost them!

We had this for the last five years – random cars parking on private spot (front of house, double yellows on road, laid to brick pavers, planted tubs and gert big ”private parking please” sign. Even better, they would regularly pull into the yard/garden of next door that we shared. We one even found 20 plus motorbikes in there, and on the back garden lawn.

Such is life living in a tourist spot.

I need to know how this ends, I need closure.

Can you and a burly mate not bounce the car into the street then report it for causing an obstruction?

I need to know how this ends, I need closure.

It turns out he’s a ghost.

I need to know how this ends, I need closure.

I’m coming round with my foldable chair and some hobnobs.

😀

Do they not have fences in this tourist spot? ^

I’m coming round with my foldable chair and some hobnobs.

Wagon Wheels, surely?

The OP appears to be far too relaxed about this. I reckon it’s his own car and he’s just trying to angry-up the forum 😀

Block it in with some shruberries

Imagine if it’d been an Audi S3….8)

GIYF

I’ve learned two things today, and the first was what ‘GIYF’ stands for.

An old chap near me used to sprinkle cars with bread and cereal, birds came down like alfred hitchcocks horror movie, left quite a few dents in cars along with lots of crap.

they soon found somewhere else to park.

They snuck off whilst I was plotting my 400km audax route.
Anyway I am chilled, just because I don’t like poor leg tattoos and that I think people who ride bikes with frayed cables should be beheaded, doesn’t mean I’m not chilled.

I think people who ride bikes with frayed cables should be beheaded

Good idea – I support this law. Did I also mention I sell cable end caps, £50 each?