Would you guarantee a mortgage for your brother-in-law?

I’ve been asked to guarantee a mortgage for my brother in law. He is living with his parents at the moment and can only afford a mortgage of X. To get the house he wants which costs more than they’ll lend him he requires someone to act as guarantor.

His parents have given him some money for a deposit but have both given up work as they didn’t like their jobs so cant’t guarantee the mortgage for him. Apparently that means that it falls to me to act as guarantor.

My wife is also giving up her job in August to go and train to be a teacher so I will be the sole earner. I’m an architect for a small firm and job security is never great as we are constantly scraping around for new work.

I’ve no real reason to think that my brother in law will default on his payments but then if the bank doesn’t think he can afford it there must be a reason.

Am I being overly cautious or even mean?

PS Sorry this has ended up in the wrong forum section!

I really wouldn’t. I’d be very wary of it but given your circumstances (wife stopping work, your own job security) there’s no way I’d see that as a good idea.

Are you prepared to pay his mortgage if he can’t?

I’d not be a loan guarantor for anyone, full stop!

I wouldn’t personally but that’s just me.

If you have to ask the question, then no.

I suspect that the guarantor will need to put up collateral, not just show proof of income.

His parents could do that with their house?

I’d say no unless I could easily afford to pay his mortgage when he lost his job and was prepared to write off any money I spent doing so.

I’d suggest he buy a property he could afford unaided.

It wouldn’t be an easy conversation though.

Given your circumstances, absolutely no way!

No, this is a crazy idea…

If even in these times of free credit (yes they are here again) the bank required this, then you have to ask whether you actually know better than the bank. What happens if he can’t or won’t pay?

It wouldn’t be an easy conversation though.

Easy enough for them to ask it seems!
I wouldn’t dream of asking anyone to do that.

I really think it depends on your relationship with your brother in law and whether you know deep down he is going to be able to afford the repayments, especially as the bank has calculated that they will only lend him x amount based upon his earnings, you also have the realist that interest rates will rise at some point in the future and the mortgage may rise significantly?

Difficult situation as to say no may cause friction, but to say yes carries some risk for you.

I was guarantor for my sister, but she was starting her own business and the risk was whether that business would be successful, but that was my own flesh and blood.

No. to many variables

Thanks, that’s basically what I was thinking but it’s going to cause no end of misery for me as my in-laws have previous history in making my life hell indirectly through my wife and this is just going to add to it. There is no doubt that if I say no it will be held against me for the rest of my days.

Cant afford the house he wants, the mortgage company have means tested his income and will offer him a lower amount within his means.

…and you would even consider risking it?

We are due a bubble/burst within a few years.

The question that jumped out to me was why can’t he buy a cheaper house than the one he wants[/b]. My first was smaller than I would have liked but I bought within my means to get into the market.

Then I read this bit:

My wife is also giving up her job in August to go and train to be a teacher so I will be the sole earner. I’m an architect for a small firm and job security is never great as we are constantly scraping around for new work.

Not a chance. Why would you even consider being a guatantor. Don’t you have your own situation to look after/worry about or would you prefer your brother in law over-stretches and gets what he wants at your risk?

If your BiL loses his job etc and you have to pay his mortgage, how would you feel if it resulted in you not eating/potentially being bankrupt.

Tell him to leave within his means- buy a smaller place or WAIT until he can afford like normal people do.

Guaranteed my sisters mortgage so she could leave her husband. No way she could get a mortgage otherwise. Circumstances made renting impractical. Did it through my own solicitor as well as hers. My solicitor spotted a few errors such as the wording that meant I would be guaranteeing the mortgage for whoever lived in the property for ever or something like that. Never had to pay any money. Ended after 12 years when she moved. Was proud to support my sister in time of need. Don’t know if that helps.

Badnewz he say “No.”

No.

That help?

Guaranteed my sisters mortgage so she could leave her husband.

My sister is in the same situation now, if I had guaranteed my brother-in-law’s mortgage I would have the right hump, since he’s ran off with another woman.

No. Absolutely not.

If I was so loaded that I’d feel comfortable that doing this wasn’t taking a risk with my own family’s financial security then I’d be offering to put up enough money that the bank didn’t need the guarantee, in exchange for a share in the equity in the house.

NO.

No way Jose!

No chance 😆

Seriously, a thousand times no. I would never think to ask an in-law of any kind to do this. What an awful position to put somebody in.

I would never do this and I would have to think pretty hard about it even if it was my own actual brother.

NO chance what so ever.

I have seen what a few ‘000 can do to a family, if this went pear shaped it would be a disaster.

Given your position I’d say no. If you sit him down and explain why I’m sure he’ll understand.

Out of interest, is the place he’s looking at towards the top end of what he can afford? Is there anything cheaper in the area?

just to add we once gave me BiL a few thousand to get him out of a situation. He paid it back. That sort of thing- definitely.

I wouldn’t even stretch myself to afford a house that I want.

You’ve already stated the perfect reason why you can’t help him. He cant take humbridge at only one of you working expected to guarantee a third.

Whats your wife’s take on this ? Would she be 100% supportive of a no decision.

Thanks for all the advice. I should point out that my brother-in-law hasn’t asked for the money directly and to be honest probably would never think about it. The idea has come from my wife and her mother who I could swear are determined to mentally cripple me by the time I’m 35!

My wife’s brother is a really nice guy but if I wasn’t married to his sister we would have nothing in common and no relationship at all so I’m not quite sure why I’m supposed to feel this overwhelming duty to help him at my own risk.

wwaswas – Member

I suspect that the guarantor will need to put up collateral, not just show proof of income.

His parents could do that with their house?

This ^^^^^

Taxi25 – she would be 100% hell to live with if there was a “No” decision. It’ll just fester and be brought up in every argument about unrelated matters for the rest of my life I imagine! Fun times ahead!

No.

The only thing I’d contemplate would to be a part owner and take rent for that share then potentially sell later after a valuation.

The idea has come from my wife and her mother who I could swear are determined to mentally cripple me by the time I’m 35!

It’ll just fester and be brought up in every argument about unrelated matters for the rest of my life I imagine! Fun times ahead!

Sounds like you have a wonderful family life. Maybe you could go halves with the BIL and move in with him? 😉

No from the OP

Thanks, that’s basically what I was thinking but it’s going to cause no end of misery for me as my in-laws have previous history in making my life hell indirectly through my wife and this is just going to add to it. There is no doubt that if I say no it will be held against me for the rest of my days.

Double no from this.

she would be 100% hell to live with if there was a “No” decision.

ask her if she’d *really* give up teacher training to get a job and pay his mortgage if the worst came to the worst.

woody2000 I think you might be on to something there!

No – Obviously.

Taxi25 – she would be 100% hell to live with if there was a “No” decision. It’ll just fester and be brought up in every argument about unrelated matters for the rest of my life I imagine! Fun times ahead!

haha, is this when the classic MTFU answer appears?

No don’t mix relationships and money. Your obviously not sure otherwise you wouldn’t ask here. Also think about the context? He’s living at home parents who have given up work because they didn’t like their jobs. Common. The danger signals are all there. Mortgages are 20 or 25 years long. Your putting yourself in a long term pain position.

Bottom dollar mate if his mother and father are so keen why don’t they go back to work and guarantee the mortgage for their son. As a parent of three I know what I would do.

Absolutely no way, no. Never.

The other obvious alternative is for him to buy a house within his price bracket. That’s what the rest of us do.

My three rent, not ideal I know but their in their 20’s and like most need to move with jobs. So renting is far easier