This site is spooky.

Some absolute gems on these transcripts.

Especially the Indian Call Centre stuff.

You: Do you cheesy ride ?
Stranger: do I ever! of course i do!
You: What sort of cheesy riding do you do ?
Stranger: swiss cheesy riding
Stranger: how bout you?
You: cheddar cheese roding mainly… when dressed in Lycra with Dirty Rubber.
Stranger: oooooh, nasty! what exactly is cheddar cheesy riding?
You: Riding singletrack on a mountain bike… do you singletrack ?
Stranger: uuuuuuuuhhhhhh
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I think i need to work at this

Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hello
You: Hi there
Stranger: What’s up?
You: Nothings up, what gave you that impression
Stranger: Uhmmm
Stranger: I guess nothing ..

You: Do you Singletrack?
Stranger: no
You: Go on, of course you do.
You: Surely everyone does?
Stranger: IM NOT SINGLE
Stranger: 1 month preg and married

😆

Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Hi there
Stranger: where you from?
You: I dont live anywhere, i travel around
Stranger: cool, are you a hobo?
Stranger: I plan on doing that someday

Bloomin Heck how good is that 🙂

Oh cripes, my first cyber sex experience is with…….a bloke with a big dick 🙁

Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello there
Stranger: I have bigger cock than you!
You: No you dont
Stranger: yes i do
Stranger: 25cm long with boner
You: I beg to differ. My cock is considerably larger than yours

Stranger: Hi.
You: Are you the Littlest Hobo?
Stranger: Nope.
You: That’s a shame.
Stranger: Why’s it a shame?
You: Well, you see I’ve been looking for him. He keeps saying that he’ll settle down, tomorrow maybe.
Stranger: Oh. That sucks. But maybe tomorrow’ll be the day?
You: Maybe it will. Maybe he’ll just keep moving on until then.

pmsl 🙂

Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Yowzer
Stranger: 1337?
You: 1667
Stranger: ehrm, no :S
You: Fail ?
Stranger: yeah way too much
You: Bah
You: Do you singletrack ?
Stranger: no
Stranger: do u play guitar hero?
You: Prefer the lycra thang personally
Stranger: what? :S
You: Y’know, sweaty, puffing, grinding away…..
Stranger: aha with the dick?
You: Well not really
Stranger: with u big toe?
You: That does play a part in the process but it’s a pretty minor one considering…
Stranger: ok, m / f?
You: : ………………………….. ………………………_,-~”¯¯”~-,
………………………………………….. …………….__„-~”¯¯:::,-~~-,_::::”-
………………………………………….. ……….„~”¯::::::::::::::”::::::::::::::::::\
………………………………………….. .__„„„-“::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::”~-,
……………………………………__-~”::,-‘::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: ::::~-,
………………………_______~”___-~”:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: :::::::::::”-,
………………….,~”::::::::::::::¯¯:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::,: |
………………..:/:::::::::::::::::__-~”:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::_,-~”:’\’-,:\:|:\|::\|\::\:|
……………….,’::::::::,-~~”~”_::’,::|::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::,~ ‘:\’-,::’,”-\::”:”::::::::\|:|/
……………_,-‘”~—-“:::/,~”¯”-:|::|::|:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::,~”::\’-,:\;;’-‘;;;;;;;;;;;,-‘::\::|/
…………,-‘::::::::::::::::’-\~”O¯_/::,’::|:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::,-‘,::\’-,:|::”;;;;;;;;;;;;,-‘:\:’-,::\
…………|:::::::::::::::::-,_’~’::::,-‘::,’:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::,-‘:\’-,:\’-,’;;’;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-‘:\:::’\-,|”
…………|::,-~”::::::::::::::”~~”:::,-‘::::::::::::::::::::::::_,-~’:\’-,|:”‘”;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-‘¯::’-,:’,\|
………../::/::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::_,„-~”¯\:\’-,|;”-‘;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-‘–,::\-:\:\|
………/::::|:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::,-‘;;’-‘;;;;’,/;\/;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-,|:::\-,:|\|..\|
……./:::::::\:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::,-‘;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-~”'(“-,\:::|\:|::”
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..,’::::::::::::”,:,-~”¯::::::::”-,::::::::::|:::/;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,’:::::::|::::,’
./:::::::::::::::|:::::::::::::::::::”-,:::::::\:::|¯¯¯”””~-,~,_/::::::::,’:::/ — ARE YOU A GIRL?!
:::::::::::::::::|::::::::::::::::::::::”~-,_::|::\: : : : : : |: : \::::::::/:/
:::::::::::::::::|::::::::::::::”,:::::::::::::”-‘:::\: : : : : : |: : :\::::::|::|\
:::::::::::::::::|::::::::::::::::”,::::::::::::::::::\: : : : : : \: : : |:::::|::|;;\
::::::::::::::::::”-,:::::::::::::::”,:::::::::::::::/|\ ,: : : : : : : |::::,’/|::::|
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::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::”~-,_:::::\:::\:::”~/_:|:|\: : : ‘-,\::”::,’\
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::”-,_:’-,::\:::::::”-,|:||\,-, : ‘-,\:::|-‘-„
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: ::,-,'”-:”~,:::::”/_/::|-/\–‘;;\:::/: ||\-,
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: :/…’-,::::::”~„::::”-,/_:|:/\:/|/|/|_/:|
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: |……”-,::::::::”~-:::::””~~~”¯:::|
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: |………”-,_:::::::::::::::::::::::::/
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::\ …………..”~–„_____„„-~~”
Stranger: me male
Stranger: u?
You: T-rex
Stranger: serrius
You: Yup, Seen Jurassic Park ?
Stranger: wanna cam so i can see t-rex?
You: Hey, I’ve only just learnt to use the internets, giz a chance with the cam thang
Stranger: so u wanna cam?
You: I ate my cam yestrday, T-rex do that type of thing
Stranger: ohh, damn
Stranger: how old r u?
Stranger: 10?
You: Well theoretically several million years old if you factor in the DNA in amber thing
Stranger: ohh, i see O_o
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

littlest hobo! 🙂

opens new tab to watch old episodes on youtube….

You: hey
Stranger: hey
You: woo freaky
Stranger: how you doing
You: not bad
You: all the ways to start a conversation and we both go for hey
Stranger: eauhuhahuaehuae
Stranger: funny
You: yeah
You: cosmic
Stranger: so asl
You: have you been to Wales?
Stranger: no, im brazilian
You: You should go
You: I’m sure Brazil is nice, but Wales has a lot to recommend it
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: greetings comrade
Stranger: hi asl
You: Do you have a beard ?
You: Well ?
Stranger: who wants to no lol
Stranger: if i do or not
You: The revolution wants to know !
You: All counter-revolutionaries are cleaned shaven !
Stranger: well thats nice
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

surely out of 2500 ish users we must have had a stw to stw conversation at some point

Well, there now must be at least 50 “strangers” wondering what the hell singletracking is!! 😯

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: why did you do that?
Stranger: what?
You: that thing you just did
Stranger: what did i do?
You: I saw you. Don’t worry, it should wipe off if your quick
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: I’m saying Hi !
Stranger: are u gay
You: I’m sorry – no 🙁
Stranger: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo]
Stranger: ok bye

Stranger: egg
You: chicken first
Stranger: egg
You: f**kin chicken
Stranger: egg
You: no i’m f**kin a chicken
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

thisisnotaspoon – Member
surely out of 2500 ish users we must have had a stw to stw conversation at some point

See earlier pages, I got a hit!

What is asl?

this is so childishly funny

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: hi
You: not you again
Stranger: lol
Stranger: who?
You: sorry different stranger
Stranger: i think you get someone different every time
You: ah, they should give all you strangers numbers
You: I get confused so easily
Stranger: lol
Stranger: well you’re a stranger too
You: they only let me on here for 5 mins a day
Stranger: why
You: court order
Stranger: right lol
You: well it wasn’t true what they said
Stranger: hmm
You: honest, the bunny got what it deserved

This is damned good fun!

Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: I don’t think they noticed. Did you get away with it?
Stranger: maybee
You: Did it hurt much?
Stranger: nah im good with pain
You: coo, ‘cos the next one is massive
You: made my eyes water
Stranger: oh jeeze all prepare myself
Stranger: ill*
You: Brace yourself. It’s coming in dry!
Stranger: ok i will
You: I’m taking a run up
You: I M P A C T ! ! !
Stranger: ahhhhh
You: you OK?
You: you look pale
Stranger: yea i think ill be okay
You: Shit. The ends come off. don’t think I can get it out
Stranger: damnit
You: try pushing
Stranger: i am its not working
You: bugger. I could try tying some string round it
Stranger: do it
You: Ok. Reef knot. Arse. It’s lipped off
You: slipped off
You: do you think it will fall out of the other side?
Stranger: maybe is it worth it to try
You: OK. I’ll get a broom to give it a good hard shove
You: ready?
Stranger: yea go!
You: OK.
You: Hmm, seems to have moved a bit. Can you see it yet?
Stranger: yea a little it keep going
Stranger: bit*
You: Def stuck. I could heat it up. I have a blow torch
Stranger: hot. do it
You: OK. Going in. Might smell a bit, but should come out like a rocket
Stranger: haha okay hurry
You: I can see it moving, yes, it’s out!
Stranger: yayayayayay
You: Can I have it back? I’ll take it back for a refund
Stranger: sure go ahead
You: Thanks
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: heey!
You: Um Bongo
Stranger: um bongo what
You: They Drink It In The Congo
Stranger: nice 😀
You: You should try it
You: There’s a lot to recommend it
Stranger: u should bring me one
You: I’m just going to the shop
Stranger: hah
Stranger: right
You: give me 10
Stranger: 10?
Stranger: i guess ur kinda crazy
Stranger: myb next time. xx
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

there’s more than one egg, ive struck up a conversation

I had egg man earlier. I was very rude to him…

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: you like egg?
You: DO YOU LIKE CHEESE?
Stranger: I LIKE EGGCHEASE
Stranger: CHEESE
Stranger: AND EGG
You: eggy
Stranger: YOU ARE EGGY
You: do you singletrack?
Stranger: WAZ IZ SINGLETRACK SIR?
You: website
You: bout bikes
You: what tyres for cheese?
Stranger: NOW I SCARED D:

asl…I asked…age/sex/land!

looks like I got him too

Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: chicken
Stranger: im not playing this stupid f**kinggg ameeee
Stranger: *game
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi!
Stranger: heyaa
You: what’s up?
Stranger: nothing much
Stranger: and yourself?
You: nothing, clearly. I’m chatting to a stranger on t’internet 🙂
You: no offence, but this isn’t a place for busy men!
Stranger: hahaha
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Why do they always disconnect on me?

has it occured to anyone that you’re all just talking to each other? 😆

I’m so desparate for a STW hit I reckon I’ll be up all night!

Bugger…just read that back and it’s SO wrong!! 8)

just had a conversation about quantum and biocomputing, was that one of you?

You: singletrack
Stranger: bacon
You: eggs
Stranger: sausage
You: baked beans
Stranger: toast
You: mushrooms
Stranger: unemployment
You: What rules of Mornington Crescent are we playing here? remind me.
Stranger: i dont know.
You: Do you singletrack ?
Stranger: what does that mean?
You: Dress up in lycra, get muddy and blast through woodland!
Stranger: ehm.. yeah. i dont understand eierkopf!
You: Do you ride a bike offroad ?
Stranger: you`re crazy
You: I was only released yesterday 🙂
Stranger: oh yes
Stranger: bye!!

FoxyChick – Member
I’m so desparate for a STW hit I reckon I’ll be up all night!

Bugger…just read that back and it SO wrong!!

FC, where do I send the bill for the keyboard repair? Have just laughed a mouthful of Summer Lightning all over mine!

I’m going to try I’m Spartacus next…

Stranger: Hi
You: I’m Spartacus
Stranger: I’m a stapler
You: and so’s my wife.
Stranger: guess she doesn’t give blow jobs then
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Do you Singletrack?
Stranger: ………………….._,,-~’’’¯¯¯’’~-,,…………………………………………
………………..,-‘’ ; ; ;_ ,,—,,_ ; ;’ ’-,…………………………….._,,,—,,_………………
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I’ve just had egg man!!! 😯

FFS ……… all I seem to get are perverts 😯

I got egg man too

And a freaky Michael Jackson picture thing

Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: bored?
You: Fancy a game of pong ?
You: | .
You: | .
You: | .
You: | .
Stranger: wtf
You: | .
Your conversational partner has disconnected.