Least favourite ‘personal grooming’ tasks!

I don’t know how people use toilet paper since I bought a portable bidet that lives in the bathroom. Utterly life-changing, you wouldn’t think 10 quid could bring so much joy

Why are proper bidets so rare in UK bathrooms? Nothing like starting the day with a clean bum 🙂

On the toenail thing- most nail clippers seem to have blades that are curved to accommodate people with tiny toes. Totally unsuitable for my big ugly feet.

@hairyscary – isn’t part of that because you’re hairy EVERYWHERE? Not seen it myself but it’s what I’d always assumed.

Why are proper bidets so rare in UK bathrooms? Nothing like starting the day with a clean bum

They are quite a problematic  piece of apparatus froma cross contamination* perspective.

The most stringent fitting and plumbing of all the bathroom and specification of all the bathroom fittings.

So i would assume with oir traditional water tank arrangement were even worse, for the same reason we had seperate taps for so long.

Haircuts.

[Bidets] are quite a problematic  piece of apparatus from a cross contamination* perspective.

Not really clear why that should be the case. Unless folk are using them in a strange way.

I suspect that as of today and for a few weeks, there will be a few more grooming and hygiene tasks that are going to be a challenge.  Any tips on left handed wiping for a right hander?

Just use your right and peel off a layer of bandage as you go?

? Get well soon

Why are proper bidets so rare in UK bathrooms? Nothing like starting the day with a clean bum ?

Hmmm sh**,shower and shave is the correct protocol 🙂

Bidets are for when you a have a bad bot bot and require additional emptying or hot sweaty days 🙂

Bidets are ace and unless your drinking from it, should not present an issue. They represent a dirty smear campaign against toilet paper.

Shaving….whether that be my head or face it’s a **** weekly hassle I could do without – I wish I could take a pill to remove all body hair as it’s utterly pointless.

I attempted to shave a few days ago but only got halfway through before my hands/arms started to cramp badly due to my spms so I downed tools and now have patchy hair and stubble on head/face,  the title of the new Arab Strap album comes to mind……

”Im totally fine with it….don’t give a **** anymore”

And it’s not exactly grooming but don’t get me started on manual/digital extraction of my bowels with cramping hands/fingers…that’s a shitshow for real.

🙂

after a few years in thailand, I dont understand why we dont have bum guns here

also, grilfriend plucking hairs out of my ears took a bit of getting used to

and how the **** do you trim the back of your head/neck without the trimmer going sideways/ up/down

after a few years in thailand, I dont understand why we dont have bum guns here

Out in Rhodes last summer, not flushing bog roll is a big thing (leading to quite eye-bleedingly revolting rubbish skips out on the streetside in the midday sun). One time I was in a trap and they had a sort of short hosepipe with a trigger like you might find on, uh, a hosepipe. I thought “oh, that’s a neat solution.”

I’m only glad that I thought to give it a test squirt before trying it “in situ” as it were, it had the pressure of a bloody fire hose. Presumably it’s a replacement for a bog brush (and in which case, actually a great idea), if I’d taken it to my bum I’d have ejected tagnuts out of my nose.

Bidets? I think I know what the problem is. Most of Britain doesn’t even have mixer taps in bathrooms. Would its bidets not be similarly configured, with a binary choice between scalding and icy?

Most of Britain doesn’t even have mixer taps in bathrooms.

I seem to be saying this a lot today but,

Is that true? Having separate taps was AFAIK to avoid a risk of contamination from the non-drinkable hot water into the drinkable cold water plus I suppose mixer taps simply hadn’t been invented). The only time I see it today is in pubs (which likely only have the cold tap working anyway) and old houses which never had the original plumbing updated. It’s surely not been a thing in new builds since, what, the 1980s? Mixer taps (in the UK) are older tech than bidets, aren’t they?

I don’t know, I’m just guessing. I’d say that parts of Britain for sure, but “most”?

IANAplumber.

Most of Britain doesn’t even have mixer taps in bathroom

That might have been true in the 1970s, I doubt it has since unless you still live in a 2 up 2 down with an outside loo and cook over the open fire.  I exaggerate, but “most” is doing some heavy lifting there I think?

after a few years in thailand, I dont understand why we dont have bum guns here

Never used one, but the description fills me with the terrible fear of contamination by a previous user, however microscopic being blasted all over my clacker valve.  Is that not a possibility?

Re: toe nails, top tip, use (or get) some slightly more powerful glasses from one of those cheap online shops for the garage/workshop/bike toolbox, and use those for toenail chopping

Shaving.

People think I like having a beard, I prefer to be clean shaven but cannot be arsed with the time and expense of shaving along with the off chance of cutting myself just before an important meeting. Also I’m sure people treat me better when I have a beard.

Hang on, I’ve changed my mind. Trimming my “down-below” hair is worse. It’s so bad I need to ensure that no one else is in the house, there’s no scheduled windows to be cleaned and then have to run the hoover about after.

I waited for a very long time for a total hip replacement which finally happenned last month. As a part of the pre-op asessment I was told that if there were any cuts, nicks, abrasions etc on my skin the op could be cancelled. As a long-term habitual nail-biter I was pretty concerned because unpleasant but true, I regularly would draw blood. All of this was the spur I needed to stop nail biting and now at the grand old age of 62 I’ve finally broken the habit. Needless to say, I LOVE cutting my nails. I also enjoy rmoving nasal hair, shaving, hair cuts (self-admdinistered or otherwise), cutting my toenails (top tip, get some decent side cutters), brushing my teeth and generally being clean. Some of you lot have issues to be sure 😉

Although the wound to my leg from the operation is now healed enough that I’m allowed to get it wet we only have an ‘over bath’ shower. I’m not allowed to raise my foot above knee height yet so I’m still on flannel washes. I crave a good soak, so much.

Haircuts. Even if I knock the top off first it takes the wife a good 10 minutes to finish the #2 clip job. What a waste of time every month. The beard gets done at the same time but take 2 minutes max.

expense of shaving

A DE razor is what you need. Shaving is still a bind but the cost goes through the floor.

Trimming my “down-below” hair is worse.

At the risk of oversharing, I had a bit of a downstairs tidy-up the other day. I don’t really know why, no-one’s been near my bits in ages, it just seemed a little out of control. I nicked myself with the clippers. **** me, scrotums can bleed. It was like that scene in Carrie.