Just had the police around, I've been accused of racism

People get murdered over parking spaces

There are nutters about. It really isn’t worth confronting random strangers over parking. You never know who you are talking to.

The head of the infamous Daniels clan “lost it” and chased 30-year-old Gerard Fullerton – who had never met him before – around Glasgow’s Jordanhill area in his car in October last year.

The 52-year-old then got out of his Volkswagon Golf and smashed Mr Fullerton’s car windscreen with a metal bar because he thought that the driver had taken too long to turn into a junction

https://stv.tv/news/west-central/180674-jamie-daniel-jailed-for-road-rage/

I’m sorry to disappoint you outofbreath, its clear from your earlier assertions you are desperate for there to be more to it than my version of events.

You say that as though somehow what you already admit to doing isn’t already bad enough!

I accept all the criticism for name calling, I deserve it and if I had not pulled him up initially he couldn’t have suggested that he park the car and sort me out.

So specifically what “more to it” are you suggesting I would want? Isn’t that plenty?

The problem with confronting someone who is doing something a bit dickish is that the person concerned will not believe they are in the wrong and no amount of reasoned argument (or name calling) will make them see differently.

A bloke nearly ran me over in Tesco car park a couple of months back making a beeline for the ‘set down point’ so he could park his new TT there. I guess he wanted to be close to the shop and not get his hairdresser-mobile potentially scratched.
When I asked him whether he’d seen me, explained that he’d almost run me over & perhaps he should drive a bit slower in the car park, the first thing he uttered was like something out of the playground – he said ‘well maybe you should have watched where you were walking….’. There was no attempt at an apology, no ‘sorry mate, I just didn’t see you’ – nothing. It was just immediately defensive & basically saying it was my fault.

I managed to stay away from going proper batshit mental at him, but explained that he really hadn’t seen me & it was only because of the fact that I was looking where I was going that I was able to jump out of the way & avoid him driving into me.

His response – “you’re a cheerful one, aren’t you?! Maybe you should smile a bit more”.
To which I did go a bit batshit mental & told him that I am normally quite a happy bloke, it’s just when **** in car parks almost run me over & then accuse me of it being my fault that I tend to stop smiling.

I was going to continue a tirade about how for someone so observant, he hadn’t actually managed to park in a parking space, but was in a set-down point while appearing to not be actually setting down or picking up…..but I realised it was pointless. The dip-shit was never going to take heed. He was doing it his way & screw everyone else. The fact he’d almost run me over was neither here nor there; I was just a moany disturbance in his otherwise smug-**** infested day……I should have boxed him into the set-down point & stood there looking smug when he came back out – but life is too short….

So what “more to it” are you suggesting I would want? Isn’t that plenty?

Apart from you accusing me of racism and physical violence here?

outofbreath – Member
“It’s not like the op lost his temper, started screaming some racial epithet at the guy while frothing at the mouth, ripping his shirt off demanding a fight.”

Given the recipient of the abuse decided to call the police it seems highly likely that in the perception of the recipient that’s exactly what happened.

The problem with confronting someone who is doing something a bit dickish is that the person concerned will not believe they are in the wrong and no amount of reasoned argument (or name calling) will make them see differently.

Isn’t the real problem that we all have different standards of behavior and if we all habitually verbally attack people who are acting legally but we deem to be ‘doing wrong’ society dissolves into an aggressive free for all?

I regularly run down a lonely road with no pavement. I’m only on the road for 100m but frankly I have to admit it’s a bit dangerous to me and to others. If someone pulls over and cheerfully says “I say old chap, isn’t that a tad risky” that’s one thing. Shouting ‘prick’ in my face is another.

I’d probably respond to either approach with a mea culpa, but others wouldn’t and I or someone else might be genuinely scared by the latter approach. Neither approach would stop me doing it.

In this case a 3 year old was watching. Does that child now think the correct approach to someone doing something wrong is “sorting them out”? At very least they’ve learned the word ‘prick’ which isn’t ideal.

Apart from you accusing me of racism and physical violence here?

Given the recipient of the abuse decided to call the police it seems highly likely that in the perception of the recipient that’s exactly what happened.

Huh?

I suppose superciluosly lecturing people on a forum will sort them right out though oob? 😆

I guess he wanted to be close to the shop and not get his hairdresser-mobile potentially scratched.

Intolerance, nastiness, selfishness is everywhere, whether its people parking in the ‘wrong’ place then getting ‘glowered at’, or being nasty about the car someone drives, I find it best to let it wash over me, it beats having a heart attack over something that’s extremely trivial.

The problem with confronting someone who is doing something a bit dickish is that the person concerned will not believe they are in the wrong and no amount of reasoned argument (or name calling) will make them see differently.

Isn’t it actually that they KNOW they were in the wrong and they don’t like being called out on it? That’s typical animalistic human behaviour – it starts as toddlers but many adults never grow out of it.

“I suppose superciluosly lecturing people on a forum will sort them right out though oob?”

Fair point Yunki. I think this thread has benefitted enough from my wisdom now!

Merry Christmas, all. (Including DS)

Tis the season of goodwill (and frayed nerves) after all

Good on you OP. The only reason I don’t challenge people is because I’m chicken. I do a good glower, mind. And the only reason that these people carry on doing it is because they don’t think anybody really cares. They also often think that everybody else is at it and they’d be a mug not to join in.

Personally I always park right at the other side of supermarket car parks because I think I’m less likely to get a trolley dent, and I spend all day at a desk and need the exercise. I can’t be doing with all that try and get as near to the entrance as possible stuff.

As for the “get a life” brigade – this is part of life.

And the only reason that these people carry on doing it is because they don’t think anybody really cares.

I don’t think that’s the case to be honest, everyone thinks differently. Parking in a parent & child space isn’t an issue to some people, others will think why should people with kids get special treatment, to others it’s a massive big deal and they see it as an injustice so feel compelled to challenge it.

Some folk get wound up by things, others don’t.

I was being accused of using a racist insult.

Are you sure they weren’t asking about contributing to a Brexit thread?

It’s marvellous that the debate here has been 90% about those parking spaces and 10% about the possible false accusation of racism.

+1 on how did the feds track you down?

+1 on how did the feds track you down?

Number plate I think, they asked if it was my car parked outside.

Reminds me of the time the police knocked to ask if the van on the drive was mine because someone had called them to say a toddler had been left alone in it! I think it must have been when I stopped outside the house to drop 3 bin bags into the utility room the day before.

In that case, if someone thought the wee guy was in danger, they should have knocked the house door to check before wasting police time. Any cases of wasting police time should be chargeable in my opinion; they’re not there as some kind of school prefect!

theotherjonv » Then you tried.

I know it’s ‘petty’ but it’s the thin end of the wedge.

What if the bloke got on and pushed to the front whilst muttering under his breath about all the immigrants getting in his way. Would you respond then?

What if he shouted ‘Oi, all you ****s (insert epithet of choice) – get off my bus, this is for English people!’ – would you do something then?

Missed that. You must’ve edited after I posted on the other page.

Is that a question to me personally or is it a rhetorical type stance. I assume the latter because of that quote you keep writing on threads like this.

But I’ll bite… personally I used to have/still have a quick temper and if I let something petty get under my skin and someone doesn’t like being told they’re wrong (cos let’s face it, no one does, do they) and respond aggressively, I’m all up for that. Which is absolutely insane given someone usually gets very hurt when fists and feet and whatever else on which you can lay your hands comes into play.

Tolerating racism and some dick that wants to push in are rather different. One is worth standing for, one isn’t. It’s for the individual to decide whether or not it’s something for which they are willing to risk their life. Some folk will punch you down and stamp on your head just because you challenge their behaviour. Once you’ve seen something like that it can alter how you respond. It has **** all to do with knitting yogurt or whatever else the internet hard want to call it.

outofbreath

Isn’t the real problem that we all have different standards of behavior and if we all habitually verbally attack people who are acting legally but we deem to be ‘doing wrong’ society dissolves into an aggressive free for all?

Wrong. The opposite is true. We all know the difference between right and wrong. When we habitually ignore people who blatantly act ignorantly and antisocially, the aggressive pricks will have a free for all knowing that most people will turn a blind eye.

…..wasting police time should be chargeable in my opinion

It is.

Maximum of six months inside.

Number plate I think, they asked if it was my car parked outside.

How did the perp get your number plate though as you said in your op ‘My wife, youngest daughter and I pulled in to the car park (all the family spaces were taken), parked and walked towards the shop

Was the perp watching you so knew which car you came from, or did he hang around and wait until you came out the store?

Was the perp watching you so knew which car you came from, or did he hang around and wait until you came out the store?

I’m not sure Gary_M, we parked in an area of the car park with no other cars immediately close, so I think he just clocked the only vehicle in the area. My wife was carrying my daughter as was asleep and I think perhaps he may have seen the lights flash as we walked away and locked it. The car also has child seats in the back, so its a good indicator it was ours.

Poor guy may have been in the middle of an armed robbery and he gets called a prick by a mountain biker… sad times.

I’m not sure Gary_M, we parked in an area of the car park with no other cars immediately close, so I think he just clocked the only vehicle in the area. My wife was carrying my daughter as was asleep and I think perhaps he may have seen the lights flash as we walked away and locked it. The car also has child seats in the back, so its a good indicator it was ours.

Which I guess must have been a fair bit away from the parent & child spaces, but a space the perp could see and he was paying attention to a random person locking their car in a busy supermarket car park, in the dark. Doesn’t really add up.

Could you give us the name of the supermarket and postcode, I’d like to look at this car park 🙂

Stacks up… fast car and right next to the entrance. Definite armed robbery in progress.

Coconut, lol….loving the racial stereotyping…is coconut a reference to how ‘your people’ see you?…brown on the outsides, white on the inside…

(runs for cover)…

outofbreath – Member

Isn’t the real problem that we all have different standards of behavior and if we all habitually verbally attack people who are acting legally but we deem to be ‘doing wrong’ society dissolves into an aggressive free for all?

Dunno, but in the example I gave blokie had almost run me over….my initial approach wasn’t to ‘verbally attack’ him, but make him aware of what he’d done & yes, I probably was hoping for a small apology as some recognition that he’d driven like a dick….it was only his response that prompted me to get lairy.
If someone approached me as I got out of my car and said “did you see me there mate, you almost ran me over…?”, I can guarantee you my immediate response would not be to turn it on it’s head & accuse the person saying that of it actually being their fault…..but yeah, some people do have different standards of behaviour…..

Gary_M – Member

or being nasty about the car someone drives,

To be fair, after almost driving me over with it, I was hardly going to praise his choice of vehicle & the balanced selection of optional extras he’d lavished it with, was I?? 🙄

Gary_M – Member

it beats having a heart attack over something that’s extremely trivial.

HA HA – so having someone almost drive their car into you is ‘something that’s extremely trivial’ is it??
Would you not say something if it had happened to you?

HA HA – so having someone almost drive their car into you is ‘something that’s extremely trivial’ is it??

No, and I didn’t say that. I was referring to petty arguments over car parking spaces. However I can see you are easily wound up.

Gary_M – Member

However I can see you are easily wound up.

Yeah, probably.

stumpy01

Dunno, but in the example I gave blokie had almost run me over….my initial approach wasn’t to ‘verbally attack’ him, but make him aware of what he’d done & yes, I probably was hoping for a small apology as some recognition that he’d driven like a dick.

I had an eerily similar experience when someone in a white TT (doing about 45mph) almost ran me over in a Tesco car park. He hit the brakes and came within inches of my legs. Then blared the horn to which i gave the universal symbol for “wtf?”

He instantly went to defcon9, started revving the engine, screaming out the window how he was going to ****ing murder me, cut my ****ing head off calling me a ****. I could see he clearly would have tried to fight with me but I didn’t rise to it. I figured if he did want to kick off inside the shop was preferable to the tarmac.

After I’d completed my shop I called the cops and recounted the incident, including the multiple threats to kill, gave them his reg. I never heard anything more about it. I followed it up with an email about a week after that. Again, nothing.

or being nasty about the car someone drives,

Car stereotyping works really well. Just now and then you meet an exception – I know someone with a Q7, he’s paraplegic and it’s one of the few normal cars he can roll up to in his wheelchair, stash the chair and drive away without help. I also know a Porsche owner and he’s a guy on whom good well-intended pertinent advice is wasted. Check out the Porch owners (past and present) on this forum and see if it fits.

But I’ll bite… personally I used to have/still have a quick temper and if I let something petty get under my skin and someone doesn’t like being told they’re wrong (cos let’s face it, no one does, do they) and respond aggressively, I’m all up for that.

I don’t mind being told I’m wrong. I mean it rarely happens 😉 but I care so little about most things (because at the end of the day they’re not important really) so it doesn’t bother me. Being being able to take judgement/criticism is a skill so many people lack; hence why our country seems to be chock-a-block with high achievers driving Audis who’re absolute bellends.

Why not make a counter claim similar to his? Send the police round to the idiot’s door. If everyone did that anytime these silly accusations are made the whole thing would end up as a farce, which is essentially what it is.

Absolutely no chance of a fight there, Jimjam, no-one can get out of a car if you really don’t want them to.

Haven’t read the whole thing but if you aren’t prepared to back your words up with fists I’d be really careful mouthing off at people you don’t know future. Could have ended a lot worse!

The fact he then reported you for racism is ridiculous on his part but some people just pull that card at anything

Tolerating racism and some dick that wants to push in are rather different. One is worth standing for, one isn’t. It’s for the individual to decide whether or not it’s something for which they are willing to risk their life. Some folk will punch you down and stamp on your head just because you challenge their behaviour. Once you’ve seen something like that it can alter how you respond. It has **** all to do with knitting yogurt or whatever else the internet hard want to call it.

In my experience the likelihood of having someone punching you down and stamping on your head for pointing out (in an appropriate way) that they’re behaving in a selfish and inconsiderate manner is pretty slim. Confronting the angry racist on a bus or train, more likelihood. Yes, it’s up to the individual to decide if they think it’s worth it, but again if as a society we’re all going to sit around and tut about it but not actually do anything, then it’ll never change.

The yogurt weaving slur was a pisstake about ‘just chill and ride your bike’, and was meant to be a humorous follow on to the Niemoller quote, that one day they’ll be coming for the peaceful cyclists too. Nice that it makes me an internet hard man though – couldn’t be much further from the truth. I’m a meek and sensitive sort but one that thinks we collectively need to grow a pair and start to face down this growing trend, even though it does make me frequently feel nervous about doing so.

Edukator

Absolutely no chance of a fight there, Jimjam, no-one can get out of a car if you really don’t want them to.

Yeah but if I’d made the decision to fight (as opposed to walk or run away) I’d let him out of the car, rather than some kind of door kicking competition.

As you don’t mind taking criticism, Davidtaylforth, this…

hence why

…is just tautological bollocks. 😛

What I just don’t get is that tho OP said that his daughter with him at the time was 3 years old, she was also asleep – presumably left in the car with his wife as sleeping 3 year olds are a little heavy to carry and tend to wake up once removed from a vehicle?

In which case why the OP’s strong desire on this occasion to use the parent and child space anyway?

we collectively need to grow a pair and start to face down this growing trend, even though it does make me frequently feel nervous about doing so.

I agree. But we also need to be discerning in that stance and hold on to a modicum of perspective.