DIY Toenail Removal – not for the weak of stomach!

I generally suffer some toenail trauma after running a marathon. Ironman Zurich was no different, and the nail on my right big toe was going to require something more than just waiting until it turned black and fell off. Out with the tools for a bit of DIY!

tools for the job

the painful nail – note the swollen bottom left indicating not all is well

loosening under the nail

loosening under the cuticle

already coming away nicely

a fair bit of nail-bed visible

out with the pliers (cue Pulp Fiction quotes where Marsellus Wallace is in the pawn shop basement)

left side of the nail has popped out nicely

right side will require a little more work

rather stubborn

a bit more loosening around the edge

more pulling

almost there but still hanging in

quite a bit more pulling and prodding

Success 8)

Just need some phenol to stop it growing back again – might employ the services of a medical practitioner for that bit 😀

Might also be worth sticking a bit of iodine on it too before it becomes horrible infected 😯

Cheers, Rich

😯

I don’t know what to say.

😯

*picks up sandwich*

Clinging onto my chair like I’m on a roller coaster here.

😯

I have seen many things on the net and even sights of peoples popped noggins under heavy truck wheels etc have never made my stomach twitch like those pics did 😆

My Mrs lost her two big toenails from lots of dancing at a club in questionable shoes a few months back 🙄

Your toes have their own fringes, coooooool.

BEJEESUS !!

One has to ask, why did you feel you needed to share that with anyone? Let alone with teh interwebz?

I’ve had a colonoscopy and had my haemorrhoids banded, would you like see?*

* I’ve had a number of other procedures too, all available on subscription, for a one off price of £10. One offer per household.

Glad to have been able to provoke a reaction 😀

Cheers, Rich

I was tempted to point out that iodine on an open wound will smart a tad. Then I realised that YOU’VE JUST PULLED OUT YOUR OWN TOENAIL WITH PLIERS. Frankly, iodine on that to you will feel like being tickled gently with a feather.

One has to ask, why did you feel you needed to share that with anyone? Let alone with teh interwebz?

Glad to have been able to provoke a reaction

I am having to stay in tonight and babysit my nephews, 3 & 6, the eldest has just asked you do another.

There seems to be a bottle of whisky missing from your kit. Everyone knows that amateur surgery always involve a bottle of whisky.

Oooft… 😯

Good effort .

Enjoy your infection.

Enjoy your infection.

Oh for once, can’t your glass be half full, George?

I am always glass half full. I did tell the guy to enjoy his infection after all. 😀

OP, congratulations on a truly original and riveting post. I applaud you, sir.

My 2nd toe is longer than my big toe so when I do any serious walking the toes bruise & the nail eventually drops off- I generally wait for that to happen though & only pull the nail off when it catches a lot-Man, that must smart!
What multi-tool for DIY surgery?

Words escape me, but I did go back for a 2nd look. 😳

Eat it! 😀

Paging Dr P for a professional opinion

Do you offer any other types of surgery – appendectomy, hernia repair ?

Nice! 🙂

Surely it will grow back?

As a nipper I had terrible problems with in-grown toenails 🙁

I had an op back in 1995 to remove mine, got em both done – one at a time.

Had the nail beds removed so they wouldn’t grow back.

It was freeking agony when the anesthetic wore off, couldn’t walk, had to keep it elevated for ages.

But look now – thing of beauty! 😉

Eat it!

That has now been seconded by my nephew, with tomato sauce.

😯

I’ve lost a few big toe nails through playing football and always thought it hurt, but shit me, looking at that’s made my eyes water!

That’s the best thing I’ve seen on here for a good while.

I’ve a running mate who’s had all of his removed, though not by his own hands.

Rocketdog has it right

That’s just wrong

Mara was 7 April, so this is nearly 4 months after?

It’s the use of a Leatherman that gains extra man points.

Does beg the question of what the hell the point in toenails is?

Mara was 7 April, so this is nearly 4 months after?

Zurich Ironman – Sunday, July 28, 2013

When ever anyone asks “What multi-tool for….” the answer is always Leatherman, accept no substitutes or imitations.

Back on topic though i cant believe you did that, when i think of some of the months i have spent in pain with ingrowing toenails lol

Jesus h. goddam mother **** christ.

Noooooooooooo

No, and thrice NOOOOOO!

Reaction acheived, now delete ffs.

TRIM THE FRIGGIN PIGGIES – the toe hair is the most shocking thing in this thread.

You are one sick ****……
I feel ill.

Lordy.