Damn, 'she' just wants to 'be friends' I need cheering up!

So there's this woman at work I really liked, asked her out and things seemed to be going well, she was always keen to do something and see me again, we've been out for a meal, even been mountain biking for 2 half days with pub stops that she said she really enjoyed but thought it's about time I found out what's going on, she just wants to be friends, aaarrrggh WTF! If that's how they felt I'd have prefered they said 'NO!' to begin with, I don't claim to understand? Anyway, I'm not even going to bother persuing it as I feel it's a waste of my time but I need cheering up, the recent threads about 'relationships/dating' that have been on here have been really amusing with the replies, so go ahead, tell me how stupid I am, how rubbish women are, what I need to do to cheer myself up, how I've had a lucky escape really cos she'll turn out to be a bunny boiler in 3 months! On a good note, I have another date this week with someone else 😀 someone I don't know so that might work out better, but I feel rotten now and can't work up the enthusiasm 😕

M

Or, if you enjoy spending time with her, spend more. She'll either come round to your way of thinking, tell her hot friend that you're the greatest guy in the world, or worse case scenario you get to hve some good times with someone you like.

Face it, you're a loser.

You should have got in first with that, then she would have chased you.

Everyone hankers after the unattainable… 🙂

she means you're nice but fugly 🙁

So let me get this straight, If the opposite sex don't want to sleep with you they should have nothing to do with you? Sounds like you have a new riding buddy who probably has a nicer arse to look at when following than your other riding buddies, and might be able to help tempt any new prospects out for a ride (bike! 🙂 ) as well.
Could be much worse…

There are plenty more backdoors er, fish in the sea.

I reckon fanciable female riding company is a good long-term investment.

Just tell her to let you know when she fancies going out again, let her do any chasing
When she does come back to you, tell her you can't make it as you have a date & suggest another time

Show her a knife and tell her you're willing to do time.

Cynical – a gentleman would use a rag soaked in chloroform.

Tell her all about the other date and watch her face, that'll be the giveaway if you've got any hope.

On the plus side I've been mates with loads of hot women and they all have hot friends that they introduce you to and you've already got your foot in the door as it were with these hot friends-of friends as you're friends with their mate.

😆 that's better, making me chuckle already … she does want to do some more rides but I said 'mmmm, I'll think about that' and she's quite happy to do something else together too but to be honest I can't be @rsed now, I'm convinced it going to waste my time and energy!

Show her a knife and tell her you're willing to do time.

Who ever said Romance is dead? Classy.

Cynical – a gentleman would use a rag soaked in chloroform.

Yes, some men just don't know how to treat a Lady.

go gay.

agree to go out for another "ride" then offer to "fettle" with her bike (losen the QR levers, oil the brake pads etc etc)

then when she has the resulting crash you can dash to her assistance and be a knight in shining armour

Invite her round to yours to talk things over.

Accidentally let her see the shrine you've built to her.

Then show her a knife and…

tell her you're into Eastenders and would like to lock her in your cellar whilst preaching the bible.

Forget her. Stay in. Stop going on dates. Save all the money you'd spend on drinks, meals out etc in a jar until you've got £800

there is absolutely no point pursuing this unless your happy to be just her friend. otherwise move on.

ask her if she'd like some flowers. When she says yes, get them and stamp on them in front of her screaming "that's what you did to my heart you psychopath!"

And then crawl to the corner of the office, hide behind a chair and weep.

you can sleep with "just" friends though, ask her

graft a dead sealion onto her

This is an almost unbelievably horrendous and hilarious idea. 😀 😯

Move on, she'll be back.

Current Mrs J was the same – just friends, until I started seeing someone else.

+1 on the fit riding buddy thing!

Remain friends and keep on taking her out for rides, at the very least you've got a nice arse to look at (assuming it's a nice arse!). Meantime date other women and ask her advice on them. If she thinks you've lost interest already she might take exception and decide you're the man for her!

You can't beat a bit of reverse psychology IMO, but then again I was always crap at this kind of thing so maybe you shouldn't listen to me 🙂

I suppose "f*ck buddy" is out of the question?

BigDummy – Member

graft a dead sealion onto her

This is an almost unbelievably horrendous and hilarious idea.

It would be great for flotation at the swimming pool. I would imagine it may start to smell after a while though, unless of course all major organs were joined and they were able to co-exist.

Hang on in there with the friends thing, maybe she this is some sort of test? Women do things like that, they are mental.

Keep cracking on to other women, don't put this one on a pedestal and let her interfere with your other efforts.

Then slowly chip away at her self esteem until see is felling rubbish enough to sleep with you. 😉

😆 some fantastic advice coming here, thanks guys … I've cheered up a bit and I think a nice wooded singletrack ride later with Rage Against The Machine on my player will sort me out

just enjoy spending time with her.she might actualy fancy the pants of you but something may be holding her back. either talk to her slowly and without any pressure about why she feels the way she does, or just be mates and she may well change her mind in the future. dont chase her too much tho.if you seem desperate youll look like a right dick and she will deff loose interest.
at the end of the day youve got another posabilty on the cards so chill out!

she might actualy fancy the pants of you but something may be holding her back

if true, and 'just want to be friends' means 'i fancy the pants off you', then ive missed a lot of action in my life thus far.

steve-g – Member

Then slowly chip away at her self esteem until see is felling rubbish enough to sleep with you.

+1 – Drop a few hints about maybe replacing those lycra cycling shorts with some baggies, or perhaps the odd critique on her riding style, and she'll soon be desperate to jump your bones. Or she'll shag your best mate.

stay friends at a distance, after a few weeks hint that you're going on a second date with someone, and robert is your mothers brother – unless you're actually fugly

We should set up a web site dedicated to relationship advice. Seriously this is way better than all that guff you get from agony aunts

Guys, you just don't get it, do you?

Kojaklollipop – Member
So there's this woman at work I really liked, asked her out and things

, she just wants to be friends

Maybe it is becuase you work together she is not sure?
Having seen other posts on here re dating workmates it can all go badly wrong.
Having also witnessed the fallings out of people who have done this it creates a really bad atmosphere in the workplace.

The staying friends, keep on riding doing other stuff sounds good to me. Maybe start including others in your rides, activities so that you do not appear to be coming on to her so strongly? Just bide your time, maybe she has "other stuff" going on atm.

just keep doing what you've been doing. Been with my wife 7.5 years (married 5 years last friday) She was the same, even asked me what my intentions were, knew that 'I just want to be friends' was coming, so told her I just liked hanging out etc. Couple of months down the line I went to OZ for 6 weeks. She missed me so much she realised she wanted to be with me. Never looked back. If you really like her, then just hang out, as soon as one of her friends starts asking about you, she'll either put in a good word for you, or she'll make a move.