Bikemonger's Fancy Eurovision Sticker Contest Deluxe 2010

'I slow down for whores'

'Remove before use'

Smell my niche
Im a crank whore
I havent got tourettes I really think you are a c**t

Straddle my 21" Giant

havent got tourettes I really think you are a c**t

Pop I'm shocked at your potty mouth!

This is how i Roll

I "Fixied" your mom

As I replied to a pub landlady when asked why we hadn't travelled by car at the weekend and instead opted for a 100+ mile ride to the passport office and back…

"too lazy to drive"

Tazzy-tsk tsk—clot!!
When do you want my big red wanga?

Bare eSSentials
Mincing Machine

Pop I'll give ya wanga a good going over tomorrow night I'll txt you.

cheers

Taz

Its a Singlering thing

SS cos Sheldon told me too !

STICKER (rapid descent Scotland)

are we there yet ?

I'm bored

Pedal faster then !

Where's my ring ?

extra frame tubes give you moobs (one for the super nichers out there!!)
gears for queers
just pedal the **** thing
big wheels for big hills
MTFU or FTFO!
I'll see your 27 gears and raise you two busted knees

I have become death, destroyer of gears. Edited Oppenheimer.

What would Charlie do?

I may have been drinking.

My other bike has THREE top tubes.

gears are for queers!

'Take the dirt track'

'Real men do it in padded pants'

'My wife doesn't know about this one'

'My girlfriend doesn't know I spent the wedding fund'

'Blood, sweat and fears'

'I didn't mean to run over the dog'

"If you think I'm slow on this you want to see me on my road bike!"

Gears are for the old and frail.

A single speed is all I need

"Convert"
Sticker to be issued free with conversion kits.

This is my Drug, I love to Pedal

Are you sitting comfortably?

(seen / heard somewhere before, I think…)

Gear Prudence

Ride my ring.

If you can read this I've run you over. Sorry.

Gear prudence. Is a classic def on the shortlist.

I grew a beared to ride this singlespeed, fixie, riged cyclocross but i looked a right tit…

Singlespeeder, so don't step on my dick.

my contenders would be:

happy bum

if i look sad it's because i'm upside down

the monkey made me do it

cut'n'shut

you won't believe how much i paid for this

mummy wouldn't buy me a bmx

hello, is it me you're looking for

look no hands

get hammered like jesus

you should see the other guy

dolphins are whores

bike & beer – in that order

tell the missus i'm working late

i'm back in the community

rusty nuts

good lawd, use a mirror once in a while

Chad Valley.

That way no one will pinch your dandyhorse

I don't stop to pee

"Singlespeeder Doublelover"
"Obviously I have a singlespeed"
"Forgot the car"
"OMG one-gear LOL"

Momentum whore
One ring to bind them all
if(singlespeed) then beard = true;
just because I have a beard doesn't mean I'll eat your baby
I live to fettle

Loving:

It's not niche, there's a recession

Is that a bike or a handbag?

(although i can't claim to have made it up – heard as heckle at Dalby NPS)

It's not niche, there's a recession
It's going on the short List.
Thursday we will have a fresh post with the shortlist. Bit of a vote. And Friday is the grand award ceremony.

"Not Nearly Niche Enough"

"Your sister's athletic"
"… and so is your Mum"

"Send it, yaaaah"
"property of ………."
"if found broken I'm within 20ft & crying"
"where's the race?"
"why race?"
"I [bike lane type pic of bike] my bike" as in I [heart] my bike.
"I paid for England in 2010"
"Rubber fetishist on board"

Cars are c*ck bins

Beware the cog

The Cogfather

I'm the Cogfather

Had more rides than Ulrika-ka-ka-ka-ka

Hows my riding? Call 0800 **** off