A small fight has broken out at STW Towers. After a series of tentative moves followed by capitalising on a fumble, Bon Jovi has made it through the wrestling ring of musical tastes.
However, Benji has played his Eagles Veto Card. Apparently one of these is available to all Eagles Disappreciation Society members.
What Benji has failed to factor in is the Mornington Crescent Eagles Veto Override Manoeuvre. An easy mistake to make when you’re partaking in musical wrestling, but if you were a spectator at the now infamous Barnes-Bryceland match of 2017, you’ll have seen how effective this move can be. Barnes thought he had Bryceland pinned down with Hanson’s Mmm-Bop, preventing Bryceland from shifting to the Eagles. By deploying the MCEVOM, Bryceland escaped, shifting Barnes through the Eurythmics and straight into the Eagles. What a move. Legendary. Hannah* has watched the replay many times and is excited to re-enact this powerplay now.
Before she makes the final move – we know the tension and anticipation are great – let us diverge and divert into FGF 662
Orange Stage 7 LE
- Price: £7,400
- From: Orange Bikes
Goshdarned it, you either love Orange Bikes or… you’re wrong. Oranges are rad. They may not be cheap. They may not be classically/boringly pretty. But they are rad. And they look cool. Maybe you have had to have ridden/owned one for a while to ‘get it’. There are two types of people who’ve owned Orange Bikes: those who still own one, and those who feel a bit sad that they don’t own one anymore. Orange Bikes fly in the face of all kinds of tedious received wisdoms. Orange Bikes are Orange Bikes.
But what about this new breed of linkage (GASP!) driven single pivot (PHEW!) Orange Bikes then? Well, let’s find out. We’ve just taken in this splendid purple beast. The Orange Stage 7 LE. 165mm rear travel. 170mm travel fork. And say what you want about the price tag (while you’re saying it, reel off all of the other brands fabricating full-suspension mountain bike frames in the UK), there’s no faulting the spec sheet. And yes, that includes the most excellent speccing of the classic Minion DHF up front instead of the all-pervasive Assegai (which we don”t really rate on our dirt, sorry). Anyway. Vive l’Orange! We’re very excited about thrashing this bike around the steep AF wooded valleys that it was born and bred for.
Specialized Roval Traverse SL II 240 Wheelset
- Price: £2,000
- From: Specialized
Specialized’s lightest ever Trail Bike wheelset ever. “Trail riders who prize nimble handling will be blown away by Traverse SL II’s category-leading control, strength-to-weight ratio, and pinch-flat resistance.” There’s also a new valve design. The ‘Roval ThreadBed Valve’ threads directly into the rim and claims to reduce the ability for sealant to clog.
Considering these are very expensive wheels – made from carbon fibre – perhaps the most interesting part of Spesh’s launch is their new ‘**it Happens’ policy. All Roval wheels come with a lifetime warranty, but they will also now come with a two year ‘**it Happens’ No Fault Crash Replacement. “If you damage your Roval product while riding within the first two years of ownership and it’s not covered under warranty, we’ll still replace or repair!” Read the full Ts and Cs.
Slicy Sublimistic Frame Protection Jo Burt Ltd Ed
- Price: £34.99
- From: Cyclorise
Yer man Jo Burt has designed a frame protection kit for Slicy. The design features black outlined flowers. Some filled white, but most are transparent to allow your frame colour to show through. And there’s a single pink flower on each section. Because. Two patches for the down tube, three for the top tube, four for seat stays and one for the seat tube.
Slicy Enduro-DH Mudguard Jo Burt Ltd Ed
- Price: £18.99
- From: Cyclorise
Fits square and rounded fork arches. Made in France. Digital printed. Largely made of recyclable Polypropylene. 45g, 273mm wide, 238mm long. Featuring the well known flowers of Jo Burt, formed in a bunch with his signature and a pink stand out flower amongst the bunch.
Crankbrothers Klic HV Mini Floor Pump
- Price: £69.99
- From: Extra UK
A maxi mini pump anyone? We’re big fans of portable pumps that have hoses. They just work betterer and don;t knacker valves. This a new backpack-able pump from Crankbrothers. 325mm in length (which I think is 13in in old money). Rated to 110psi (which I think is 7.6 bar in Euros). Magnetic ‘quick-connect’ hose which is nicely flexible and stows away when not in use. Fold-out ‘klic stand’ foothold with rubbery base. I like the base.
Fizik Vento Ferox Carbon MTB Shoes
- Price: £299.99
- From: Extra UK
These are aimed at the ‘serious off-road racer’, as they’re super lightweight yet tough. There’s excellent walking grip, stiff carbon soles, rubber tread, a secure top strap and BOA closure system, and they’re the prettiest shoes in the building. That last part is Amanda’s opinion, not actual fact.
Altangle Hangar Connect
- Price: £198
- From: Altangle Cycling
We first saw this rack at Sea Otter a couple of years back and thought it looked like just the thing for keeping in the car or van so that you’ve always got a proper bike rack to hand. Mechanical mishaps away from home are frustrating enough without having to balance your bike against a bench or dangle it from a tree to work on it. Weighing 3lbs and claiming to clamp to almost every surface – from round gazebo uprights to flat table tops. Hannah was planning to attach it to the hand rail on her van, and has now added that to the list of things she’ll try when she has two working arms. Not that she’s sulking.
99p Singletrackworld Membership
- Price: 99p
- From: The Singletrackworld Shop
Charlie says: “You can now join over 6,000 other mountain bikers at Singletrack from only 99p. That is a one month digital membership offer. You will also find 1/2 price annual membership deals which are better long term value.” Click here to see all our membership deals.
Thread Of The Week
Congratulations this week goes to crossed from bringing out all the Toms & Barbaras (ask yer Mud/Dad) from the forum woodwork to chip into this DIY dirt digging debrief…
The winning TOTW in FGF gets a prize. And it’s the fabulous majestic Singletrack Forum Bottle Opener! So, BIGGUPYERSEN! to crossed! Please email editorial@singletrackworld.com. Please include your postal address, as it really speeds up delivery logistics like. Ta!
OK. Brace yourselves. Back to that musical wrestling match. It’s time for that superb agile move from Eurythmics to Eagles. Behold the grace and elegant power of this shift. Pure ballet.
*Some of you may be surprised to learn that Hannah has not been prescribed any interesting painkillers for her dislocated shoulder. Has pain driven her round the twist?
What is Fresh Goods Friday?
It’s Singletrack’s long running, weekly roundup of all of the new products that have been sent in to the magazine.
Where do all of the goods come from?
They’re sent in by bike companies and marketing agencies
What happens to all of the products?
They’re featured and then some are reviewed down the line in either Singletrack Magazine or in online reviews and photoshoots.
What happens to them when you’ve finished with them?
They’re usually sent back after review, or kept on long-term test bikes. But no one ever asks for shorts and shoes back. Trust us on that. Once we were asked to return some brake pads.
I’m a company making the next big thing. How much does it cost to feature in FGF?
Nothing. Nil. Zero. Diddlysquat. Sod all. Just send all ‘next big things’ to us at – Fresh Goods Friday, Singletrack Magazine, Lockside Mill, Dale Street, Todmorden. OL14 5PX. Please note that if you require the products back after they have featured then you are responsible for arranging collection at your cost. While it is our policy to feature everything we receive in FGF if we decide your product is not suitable for publication we won’t do it. Publication is at our discretion. Whether a product goes on for publication as a review is at editorial discretion. Beer, coffee & spirits will ALWAYS be tested.
More Reviews
“I don’t like The Eagles. Their albums are good for keeping the dust off your turntable and that’s about all.”
Tom Waits
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