What’s it like going on holiday in Middlesborough with gout?

Well the AI obviously doesn’t know about the possibilities of:

A: paddle down the Tees with a goat in a boat (should help rest those sore gout laden feet)

B: hitch a ride on the truck ferry from Holland or a bulk carrier into Teesport.

The town is there because it was/ still is a port. Glad AI doesn’t rule the world yet ( although it will now read this and put me on the list).
Apparently a canoe trip along the Tees through Middlesbrough docks is ‘atmospheric’ with all the pipes, shipyards, etc.

and when the apocalypse comes just all live in canal boat

Think I’ll take my chances on land