Buffalo Solders – A bison gets an apprenticeship in a pcb factory.

OK, Sc-Fi now…..
Close Encounters of the hird Kind – After an encounter with Thora Hird, a line worker feels undeniably drawn to an isolated area in the wilderness (Yorkshire) where something spectacular is about to happen ….to Compo.
Kira – A secret military project endangers Neo-Tokyo when it turns a biker gang member into a rampaging psychopath that appears in period dramas.
The mega Man – Army doctor Robert Neville struggles to create a cure for the plague that wiped out most of the human race while all the time thinking he is the coolest dude alive.

Oman Holiday – Desert romp starring Gregory Peck and Audrey Hepburn. Continues after the News at Ten.

Tar Trek – To boldly lay roads where no one has gone before

The Princess Ride – Unearthed home footage belonging to the late Dodi Al Fayed

Lara Croft: Tomb Rider – well-endowed young woman gets jiggy in the cemetery

The Man In the Ron Mask – Harrowing tale of the black man trapped inside Ron Atkinson’s body

All Quit on the Western Front – “Sod this for a game of soldiers”

Topic Thunder – It’s a bad day for the STW chat forum as all the big-hitters arrive on the bike helmet-join a union-Tory bashing super thread to end all threads…..

Close Encounters of the Third Kin – Being undeniably drawn to your relatives (a tale of everyday Norfolk folk)

House of 100 Corpses – Rob Zombie’s not so impressive sounding sequel

True Les – Harrowing biopic of a sports presenter

Capon – An emasculated rooster gets involved in organised crime

Despicable M – 007’s boss’ hilarious attempts to luring bond into a sexual encounter, will Q join in? find out in cinemas this friday!

Hoff – Jack Nicolson plays David in this bio-pic.

Erms of Endearment – He knows he loves her, he just doesn’t know how to say it..

Karate KD

Lesbian folk singer takes on all comers in this martial arts romp

The hunt for ed october – Tommy Lee jones plays a stern looking military type on a mission to find the crime lord Ed October

Letter from Iwo Jima.
A guy called Jim, who has awful handwriting, finds that his letters have turned up in strange places, due to the postal service being unable to read the address on the envelopes.

The Tran Sorter – Jason Statham has to work out which of the bevvy of beauties that he’s with are men, with hilarious consequences.

‘arry Lyndon – Frank Bruno as a lovable rogue trying to pass as aristocracy in 18th century ireland

Fags of Our Fathers – Teenagers going through the ashtrays in their dads sheds

The ink panther – Bumbling French detective follows large cat tracks after it knocked over bottle of Qwink
Chariots of ire – Really pissed off blokes race horse drawn vehicles in slow motion on beach (but not on Sundays)
Death of an alesman – Sad passing of a local brewery proprietor

…must get on with some work!!

Yep, bored this evening…..

Fight Cub – An insomniac office worker and a devil-may-care soap maker form an underground bear fighting club that transforms into a violent revolution.
The Magnificent Sven – An oppressed peasant village team hire a manager who just might get them out of the most oppressed league in Mexico.
The World’s Fatest Indian – The life story of New Zealander Burt Munro, who spent years building a 1920 Indian mobility scooter so he could get into town for donuts.
1 Angry Men – A dissenting juror in a murder trial slowly manages to convince the others that the dark skinned accussed gentleman is actually guilty, starring Jim Davidson.

Blimey these are brilliant. Best thread ever.

Beauty and The Best : The story of Two hot models and a pissed up footballer..

All Quiet on The Western Font – Larry’s typewrite is broken, can he fix it in time?

The odfather

A middle aged gangster with an unhealthy obsession of 29″ singlespeeds

Oman Holiday – Audrey Hepburn on vacation in the middle east

Roma Holiday – Audrey Hepburn goes off travelling in a horse drawn caravan..

Seven rides for seven brothers: a big family cycling holiday biopic

Men: a film with no mutants in it whatsoever

‘Arry on Camping: Mr Redknapp goes off into the woods to escape the Euro Champs and to come to terms with his feelings (and to open a new bank account for his dog)

Escape to Victor

Ragtag band of PoW’s create an audacious escape plan in which they form an unlikely amdram group to take part in the 1944 german Amdram championships. Their performance of ‘One Foot in the Grave’ has their guards rolling around in hysterics at which point they make their escape through the make up room.

“Time Out – I don’t BELLLLIIIIIEEEEVVVVEEE how contrived this story is”

Also:

One Foot in the Rave

Peglegged grumpy pensioner takes a wrong turn on the M25 one night and loses the next 12 hours of his life in a swirl of neon and MDMA in a field near High Wycombe.

Loita – Teenage dyslexic Ray goes after an underage girl.

ran man – the sequel to running man

The Empire Trikes Back – Julius Caesar re-conquers 21st century Britain by traversing the centures in a DeLorean three-wheeler

Fried Green Tomatos at the Whilstlestop Caf – Ian Beale gets threatened by the local council and the mitchel brothers after peggy gets food poisoning.

Seven rides for seven brothers – looks likes they all scored!

Unreakable – Samuel L Jackson proves that his deodorant stands up to any challenge.

Obocop – 21st century cop fights crime with string instruments

Ho Fuzz – nuff said

ill bill vol 2 – back with more ailments

Sinal Tap – A made up band go on tour with a heavy cold.
arousel – Musical in which a travelling fairground worker uses his horse based ride to pick up girls
Wet Side Story – Government information film about the perils of sleeping in the wet patch
antasia – one half of the well known presenting duo tours the far east alone

Das Bot – Claustrophobic journey into the nether regions

1 Angry Men. One mans stuggles against poor grammar on internet forums

Tree colours: Red – A beautiful French woman discovers the true meaning of friendship using only a step ladder and a spray gun.

Get carer – Michael Caine travels back to Newcastle to find the woman who’s been stealing his elderly brothers belongings in a residential home.

Gone with the win – the heartbreaking tail of how Jennifer Aniston leaves her loving husband played by vince vaughn after he wins 53million dollars. bitch.

Pretty Oman

Julia Roberts is romanced by Richard Gere in the Arabian Peninsular