Sexism on STW (a goodbye and some thanks :) )

Nonsense. The forum doesn’t have a “way”, but it sometimes gets hijacked by a few impolite bigmouths who ruin it for everyone else.

That’s for the mods to decide, not you. Those of us that aren’t mods are all equal. If the sexism has only been a few bigmouths, then there’s no reason to go (or moan about it) is there?

I hope I am not the culprit as I only advocate maggots reduction and occassional views on celebrities turds. Apart from that I only offer simple solutions … nuke!

IMO everyone has been rather well behaved. Yes, you do get a few comments here and there on women but they got the mods to deal with if they go too far, so I just hope diverse views are not seen as an attack on certain people.

Participating in a forum is like a balancing act. You switch off the moment you get bore …

Oh ya … TJ, Elf etc are funny lots … 😆

Del – I do report on occasion.

What I meant was I hoped that the mods will clamp down again on sexism on here as it has caused some of the female posters to leave and others to greatly scale back their posting- a situation which I believe is to the detriment of the forum.

just read all this thread (was bored), but i have to agree with the ladies on here.
all the offensive sexual stuff is not needed. a lot of female stw’rs do not come on the forum anymore, and i reckon the sexism is a big part of the reason why.

we all spout a fair bit of shyte on here from time to time, but somethings are uncalled for, what i would like to know is, would the offenders talk in the same manner to or in front of their wives/girlfriends?

i reckon not if they are honest with themselves.

ton they probably don’t have wives or girlfriends. 😉

What a shame, two of the most pleasant posters gone.

I’ve challenged a few offensive posts of the ‘Look at this woman, isn’t she ugly?’ type in the past.

I find that telling people how to find an image of the partner of the idiot involved, then inviting everyone to compare and contrast usually does the trick.
Amazing what you can find on Google Images.

It’s not difficult:
If you wouldn’t like it said about your mother, sister, daughter or partner, don’t say it about anyone else.

would the offenders talk in the same manner to or in front of their wives/girlfriends?

Do you ever objectify your partner?

LOLs at the barefaced irony of “flange” and “wrecker” complaining about the length of this thread then suggesting that if people don’t like what they read they should go elsewhere. 😆

I think the chat forum needs heavier modding, definitely. An maybe a league table to make all the points-scoring worthwhile.

I’ve challenged a few offensive posts of the ‘Look at this woman, isn’t she ugly?’ type in the past….
If you wouldn’t like it said about your mother, sister, daughter or partner, don’t say it about anyone else.

Well that would make for very dull reading.

Most women I know are FAR FAR bitchier than men about other people’s behaviour and appearance. I don’t see many gossip mags aimed at men for example.

That’s for the mods to decide, not you. Those of us that aren’t mods are all equal. If the sexism has only been a few bigmouths, then there’s no reason to go (or moan about it) is there?

It’s a simple matter of politeness. If the few who insist on being impolite carry on, despite having been asked to stop, then the rest of us have every reason to go on about it.

what i would like to know is, would the offenders talk in the same manner to or in front of their wives/girlfriends?

are you joking ? i say things to my wife that i wouldn’t dare say on a public forum.

anyway, i think we’ve all learnt a valuable lesson

today someone was merely offended, tomorrow it could be childs face

TYS………….no mate i dont, why?

Has anyone cross-referenced this story?

Racist tweet story

Worth thinking about before you post racist/sexist/defamatory material.

May not apply, may come to nothing of course.

i say things to my wife that i wouldn’t dare say on a public forum.

If your wife asked you to stop saying those things because she found them offensive, what would you do?

If your wife asked you to stop saying those things because she found them offensive, what would you do?

Get her to report me to the mods if it bothered her that much.

A long-term and respected contributor to this forum who is female has described the posters of sexist comments as being like earwigs and woodlice that live under bricks.

Are they REALLY unable to understand why that might be, or are they suffering from some sort of developmental problem?

possibly the inability to grow a skeleton on the inside…obviously 🙄

If your wife asked you to stop saying those things because she found them offensive, what would you do?

ask her where the woman that i’d married had gone 😀

ton – so you never say she looks sexy? Has a cracking bum? A beautiful smile…

The thread that prompted Sue’s post today started to go this way. Would you say it to your Wife/GF etc…

To which I replied similarly to how trailmonkey did… what happened after that I’ve no idea, I went to bed.

TSY, to her, of course i do, but to be offensive never.

TSY, to her, of course i do, but to be offensive never.

Excatly – it’s about context. You know your wife wouldn’t be offended by those comments. Not the same thing as juvenile references to anal intercourse on a public forum.

Excatly – it’s about context. You know your wife wouldn’t be offended by those comments. Not the same thing as juvenile references to anal intercourse on a public forum.

right, so the analogy of not saying on here what you wouldn’t say to your wife doesn’t stack up then.

glad we all got round to agreeing in the end.

Excatly – it’s about context

So, playing devils advocate a bit, in a thread about appreciating whoever that athlete was (Ennis?*) would you not expect comments about her physical appearance as well as her sporting ability?

*(To confirm my Guardian reading, position on the political compass as being between Gandhi and Mandella) I didn’t even open it.

position on the political compass as being between Gandhi and Mandella

does that mean you’ll take part in armed struggle but only if you’re sitting down peacefully at the time ?

we all spout a fair bit of shyte on here from time to time, but somethings are uncalled for, what i would like to know is, would the offenders talk in the same manner to or in front of their wives/girlfriends?

Ton. imo that is what is wrong nowadays lots of young ones do 🙄 Those of us in middle age would never have dared speak to women the way the 20-30 some-things do nowadays ❗
imo again and recently in the press and on some tv progs the influence of music videos and the lyrics/scantily clad women are having an effect on the way men look at/treat women. eg why did Rhiana need to run through a field in Ireland half naked ❓
Like some others I to have reduced the amount of time spent on here and posting and have been here since the Go-Far days so can confirm it has descended into something unrecognisable from then ❗

So, playing devils advocate a bit, in a thread about appreciating whoever that athlete was (Ennis?*) would you not expect comments about her physical appearance as well as her sporting ability?

“She’s very good looking” is a widely-shared opinion.
“I would” is irrelevant ego-massaging, because she wouldn’t.
“I’d bang her back doors in” is plain-nasty misogyny.

In any case, plenty of people have made it quite clear that they have found some comments to be unacceptable, so why carry on making them?

I think it used be referred to as having good manners.

I really hope it makes a comeback.

7 pages WoW!!!

Sexist remarks have no place and are clearly against forum rules – in both ways (loose women note)

We should be sensitive to others – sex isn’t the only issue that causes upset – think before we post, because most of us overstep the mark occasionally

Shame that people feel alienated/upset enough to leave – far better to simply ignore. There will always be inflammatory comments on an open thread

Don’t lose a sense of humour (where appropriate) though! We should all be able to laugh at ourselves!!

I’m ssssssoooooooooooooo looking forward to tomorrow’s A + A thread!

Those of us in middle age would never have dared speak to women the way the some 20-30 some-things do nowadays

Indeed, just secretly scoffed at a woman wanting to learn to drive eh, but polite in company. 😉 Which is worse? Also, FTFY.

People should be treated with respect. Respect (roundly) doesn’t mean not appreciating their attractiveness, it just means not making it the ONLY positive thing you think of them. Simple, surely? At the end of the day no-one wants to be thought of *solely* as an object, but almost everyone wants to be physically attractive to someone – it’s human nature, I think. Physical attractiveness is part of every day life, we can’t avoid it or avoid being attracted to it or commenting on it. What we can avoid is commenting on it negatively or assuming the target of the comments isn’t seen solely as a physical object. This is just common sense, surely? However someone mentioning someone’s attractive and not subsequently pointing out all of their other positive traits doesn’t mean they’re objectifying and solely thinks of the person as a sex object. Attractiveness can be commented on without using phrases that would make the target shudder when they read it, I think this line is the line some members struggle with.

Cougar makes a good point

Twice in one lifetime? When you’re hot, you’re hot.

Here’s another one perhaps. The number of male posters on here vastly outnumber the female ones. Why’s this an issue? Anyone? Bueller?

With a 50:50 split, the guys making comments about celebrities being attractive is no big deal, the ladies are probably doing the same thing. When you’ve got a big group of blokes and only a couple of women though, it becomes intimidating. Bullying, in fact.

The same would be true if roles were reversed. I’d have no issues if someone started a thread about how hot, I don’t know, Robert Pattinson is. I probably wouldn’t even read it, but if I did and it was full of sexist comments like “ooh, he can suck on me anytime,” I wouldn’t be phased. On the other hand, if I was one of a handful of blokes trying to fit in, and that sort of braying pack mentality permeated every thread, I think I’d feel pretty threatened. (And any bloke who thinks a pack of women can’t be intimidating has never been out with a pack of women.)

I’ll be honest, a lot of this simply hadn’t occurred to me until this thread gave me cause to stop and think. I hope I haven’t been out of line previously (I don’t think I have but couldn’t be sure) and I’ve no intention of changing who I am, but I’ll try to be a little more careful about my choice of words in future. So maybe there is some good to come out of this.

I wouldn’t be phased. On the other hand, if I was one of a handful of blokes trying to fit in, and that sort of braying pack mentality permeated every thread, I think I’d feel pretty threatened.

Fairly certain that out of the hundreds of threads I’ve read this month I’ve not seen any blatant sexism or such braying pack mentality? Maybe it’s because I use my subconscious judgement and avoid that sort of thread, leaving it to those who see fit to show themselves up? Maybe it’s because it doesn’t exist. I’m not sure.

Mods on overtime alert

Anyhow, what tyres for laughing out your ass?

I’d honestly be seriously flattered if someone wanted to bang my backdoors in. I’m in two minds whether I’d let them. But it’s the thought that counts. Problem is that nobody appears to want to regardless of gender so I feel a bit left out.

I quite like the pub analogies as i’ve been in loads and listened to so much rascist, sexist, mysoginist shit it’s unbelievable. In all my time I’ve never seen anyone actively speak their dissapproval then flouce out…unless they were bigger than the spouter. Most people grasp their drinks tighter and “tut” a lot out of ear-reach. So the OP does at least have the privelege of raising her dissapproval for debate and discussion. Which may not be an option in an East End pub. What I am trying to say is that internet forums may appear to allow comment thatbwould not happen in public, but they also support challenges that would not hapen either. Hurrah! For singletrackworld and ll who sail in her.

DavidB – Member
Hurrah! For singletrackworld and ll who sail in her.

Her???

Why do you need to attribute a female gender to an internet forum? Are you some sort of misgny misogi woman-hater??

Most women I know give as good as they get when it comes to (so-called) sexist banter and don’t get all uptight about it. They realise it’s all just a laugh and dish it back big time.

My reluctance to participate on this forum these days has nothing to do with sexism, and everything to do with the number of people who simply act like aresholes. I can wholly sympathise with anyone who doesn’t want to hang out on here anymore, it’s become a much more aggressive and disrespectful place of late.

As I’m not really the ‘oggling’ type I must have avoided the sexist ‘rugby-lad’ threads… I must admit though I’d never given a phrase like ‘bang her back doors in’ any thought whatsoever, though I can see it being insulting to some people, and it’s not like I’m going to use it myself..

I think what intimidates a lot of women (and men) is that stw threads can often turn into a bickering argument. it’s the personal insults that I can’t be bothered with. I don’t come across it in real life so I don’t want to be reading it at home. And that’s fine, I normally just gloss over it. But the general atmosphere of certain threads certainly does put me off contributing to the rest. Generalising here, but I do believe women are more likely to take such stuff personally (I know I would)

edit: i.e. what kit just said 🙂