RBS, MASSIVE BONUSES AND HUGE LOSES.

Right, I’ve had a think about this and have decided I agree with the “anti banking” side. So, I propose:

We fire anyone involved in the original problems so that they can’t be accused of profiting from failure. Yes, there will be large payouts but that is fine becuase they will be gone.

Then we hire the best people in the UK to come in and make the bank profitable. This will be paid for by “us” apparently so they will get paid 50% less than market rates to deliver best value. These new people will be very keen to join RBS for lower salaries and more preasure.

To reward these new people we will offer them bonuses if they succeed in making the various parts of the bank profitable. But, even if they succeed in their areas we may still not pay them there bonuses because, well, it’s RBS and “the tax payer” doesn’t like bonues.

These employees with still stay around because they will show loyalty like all employees do. They certainly won’t be looking around and RBS certainly won’t loose these people.

Simple, fool proof even…

oops

No, no, no.

Since RBS is owned by ‘us’ we just agree that for every bonus we pay to ‘them’ we also pay the the same to ‘us’.

No one will object to being given a share of the success of ‘our’ bank, its only right after all, thereby everyone will be happy because those greedy lunch-eating bankers wont be getting any more than ‘us’ hard done by working types who after all deserve such windfalls.

All in favour say ‘Aye and we’ll celebrate with Ouzo

Leaving aside the extraordinary scale of the intervention required to keep (some) Uk banks afloat, it is easy to forget that large amounts of current revenues/profits are merely accruing because Central Banks here, in Eur and the RoW are maintaining completely false/distorted markets that by design are created to enable banks to return to profitability and hopefully play their important role in the transmission mechanism. So the plea, that haven’t I done a good job this year is based on very, thin ice. Warm the temp up a little and have normalised markets and that ice would soon crack plunging most of these guys back into the freezing water.

Perhaps RBS’ bonuses in GBM should actually be going to staff in the BoE and ECB? Are these they real £10m widget makers?

I’m just glad that when we become independant we can off load RBS to the City of London. Happy Days 😀

stevewhyte, Unlikely. RBS is selling most of it’s retail business in England to Santander whilst buying a lot of Santander’s North of the border.

I’m afraid, for the Scottish, it’s a keeper.

Somebody who was (once) very dear to me now works in corporate recruitment/executive research for RBS. Must be strange/interesting times for headhunters.

I’d love to ask her about it – if we were on speaking terms, that is. 🙁

Steve – by the time we get to that stage, the clean up will have been largely done and then we can scrap over who keeps the profitable bits of RBS (the basic banking).

Noteeth, they are still recruiting for sure!!

they are still recruiting for sure!!

I might submit a falsified CV under an assumed name… just on the off-chance she interviews me. 😈

cynic-al – Member

What about all the folk made redundant by banks?

Still pretty chuffed about it here!

Northwind – Member

cynic-al – Member

What about all the folk made redundant by banks?

Still pretty chuffed about it here!

And here….. 😀