On my bike, I sometimes nip through the security barrier at work, straight after a car has gone through.

I feel mildly dangerous

I sometimes leave the toilet seat down to have a pee while standing up….

I didn’t put the bins out on Tuesday 😳

I remove USB sticks without ejecting them first.

…most of the above I can accept and I’m sure those confessing to murder are mainly misunderstood (though weeing without seat up is pretty much watersports.)

Just don’t stand on the left on tube escalators. Or you’ll hear me saying ‘excuse me!” in sanctimonious tones. And no one wants that.

And I don’t care how gansta you are, don’t leave the fridge door open whilst putting milk in tea.

I rode along a NT footpath on the CX’er earlier and got caught by a Ranger, I say a Ranger but he couldn’t actually confirm whether he was or not. I asked for ID or something to confirm who he was but sadly Ashley couldn’t enlighten me. 😀
I also explained the nature of the path and that it’s used by families as a permissive pathway and is used by kids on bikes and dog walkers for well over 20 years now, he seemed little interested in all that and quite content to want to escort me 1/2mile down to the road. Of course I politely declined his kind offer, asked if he had a Boss or actually someone who was either the Landlord or the Agent of the Landlord, I fear I put Ashley in an awkward position when I started to ask these questions, sadly for him I think I may have dissipated his initial angst with both intelligence and fitness.

I got escorted off Lord mountbatten’s estate by a gamekeeper after taking a wrong turn on a marathon training run. I knew it wasn’t the official Test way route but it actually follows the river which is beautiful, a gate was left open that wasn’t usually so I went for it.
Claimed I was lost, gamekeeper\fishery guy said the Lord would have his head if I passed on that side of of the house. Shame ‘cos it was such a nice route far nicer than the actual test way which seems to hardly go near the river, in that area anyway.

You lot are totally out of control!

I walk across my yard at work to my truck everyday with NO Hi-Viz, even though the sign says I have to have it on!

I also use the wash bay before 6am.. Even after a memo was issued saying this was not to happen.

I climb on top of my tanker without raising the handrails…

I don’t turn up for work until bang on my start time (much to my bosses annoyance)

I never read work memos.

I ride with a tinted visor.

I filter to the front of queues on my bikes.

I don’t always remove my helmet to pay for fuel.

I’m a man with blatant disregard for rules.. Surprised I’m still even breathing.

Wrong way down a one way in Waitrose car park.

Thug Life y’all

Always taste the grapes before I buy them. Every week for 25 years.

My clotted cream always goes on top of the jam on top of the scone.

I always drive at exactly 3mph above the prevailing speed limit.

And when in America, I walk places, including CROSSING THE ROAD WITHOUT A CROSSING.

I ride on pavements……….

I’ve been to Finningley to see the Vulcan take off and landing.

Alarm starts beeping when leaving supermarket.

Security goon: “Can I look inside your bag?”
Me: “No”.
SG: “Oh”.

I park in the first space I see in the car park then walk to where I’m going, rather than the legally mandated circling of the car park for 20 minutes to find a space 50m closer to the front……

…thought of another one…

When shopping in my local tesco’s or co-op….

Please use the baskets provided

No thanks, i’m on my bike so i’ll use my messenger bag, once it’s comfortably full that’s quite enough shopping for me to carry rather than inadvertently fill a basket and have to squash everything in.

This is me, in the Ducati Museum in Bologna. That’s Loris Capirossi’s Desmosedici. Read the sign.

[url=https://flic.kr/p/8ciQSW]Italy 2005 035[/url] by Peter Atkin, on Flickr

No helmet. Naughty

somafunk – Member

No thanks, i’m on my bike so i’ll use my messenger bag, once it’s comfortably full that’s quite enough shopping for me to carry rather than inadvertently fill a basket and have to squash everything in.

There’s a certain sort of rarified pleasure in this- going around a shop putting everything in your non-approved bag and generally looking a bit shoplifty, then just as the security guards are about to sweep, going and paying for it.

I let Li’l J watch three episodes of Paw Patrol this morning.
His Mammy only wants him to watch a maximum of two. She was in Bed.

lookmanohands » I sometimes leave the toilet seat down to have a pee while standing up….

Best user name to fit the crime – get risky…!

I take chocolates from the bottom tray, regardless of whether there are any left of the top.

Edit:

I often use blue instead of black ink on forms…

I frequently ride down the wrong side of the road, around the barrier on the Clifton Suspension Bridge. (Not that I am alone)

I ignore signs all the time, they are for other people. (I am Sign-maker)

mcmoonter – Member
My clotted cream always goes on top of the jam on top of the scone.

POSTED 1 HOUR AGO # REPORT-POST

Please go back and read the thread title – “Mild rule breakers“

Then, please start another thread for those, such as yourself, who have committed crimes, which as well as being far from mild, are heinous to the point of being against the very fabric of all humanity.

You sicken me.

My local loop has a golf course section.

I like pot noodles

McMoonter is adopted Cornish. Well I never.

I’m smiling on my passport photo.

I think McMoonter needs to clarify:

cream on jam – all right-thinking folk would do that

… on the top of the scone – If you mean that literally then I’m with the cap’n. An outrage.

cream on jam – all right-thinking folk would do that

It would appear that I have to kill again.

pfft – sometimes I have scones with fruit in as well 😀

Who in their right mind would ever put jam on top of the clotted cream?
Nutters.
Off to Devon tomorrow so will be eating plenty of scones.
Cream on top of course.

Why ruin it with jam in the first place??

Tuesday pants on a Thursday.

Imperial spanner on metric nut.

Cream/Jam/More Cream

Baddest of the bad me.

I’m banned from Slovenia and Monaco. Not saying why.

I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die

Ooh, I’ve got a good one. I never paid my doctor’s bill in Switzerland (for treatment I didn’t ask for, and nobody told me I’d be charged for). I’ve been back a few times since so don’t appear to be banned.