If you could revisit your teenage years.

To balance it,
Go to uni, but TRY.
Don’t be afraid to try things, failing doesn’t matter.
Don’t start the booze and dope until After you’ve done whatever was on the to-do list for the day.
Don’t worry, it is big enough and you do know how to use it 😳

Lighten up and enjoy the freedom instead of being old before my time.

2016, sell everything you have, loan to the hilt, and put it all on Leicester.

More petrol

Concentrate more at Uni and drink less.

Spend more time riding bikes, you’ll miss cold rainy Wednesday afternoons in the Peak one day.

Spend more money, your 30yr old self will hate you for it, but he’s just going to spend it on solicitors when buying a house.

Do a gap year after uni, once you start work it becomes “well I could afford to go now, but it’ll ‘cost’ a years wages”.

The “just go with it” voice in your head has a lot more fun than the “you’re both drunk and will regret this in the morning voice”, go with the first one.

Don’t spend money on media, it’ll never be worth anything.

apart from vinyl of course. Some sells for crazy money now

I must say, that had I done all those things ‘I should have done’, I probably wouldn’t have ended up in the relatively comfortable and very happy situation I now enjoy. Fate is a strange and wonderful thing; it seems my procrastination and over-cautiousness have actually worked out very well. In fact, even if I’m really honest, the only things I wanted to change, I couldn’t have anyway. So, no real regrets, thankfully.

Ok, so a couple of haircuts and fashion choices might not have been great, but hey ho. As for girls; yeah, maybe I could have been a little ‘braver’, but again, in hindsight (what a wonderful thing), no major regrets.

Best decision I ever made was turning down the military (RAF) when leaving uni. So pleased not to have been a willing participant in imperial belligerence.

apart from vinyl of course. Some sells for crazy money now

Precious little of the vinyl I’d have been likely to buy (or actually did) would be worth a jot now.

Drink less….. a lot less!!

Stand up to your parents and don’t let them bully you into choosing a uni course that you have no interest in, making you miserable for years and setting off a chain of events you’re still sorting out over 20 years later

Concentrate more at Uni and drink less

opposite for me. work less hard at uni and party more. Especially in the first 2 years that count for sh1t towards your degree.

And when you get towards the end of your 2yr postdoc in the US, reply to the email from Keith Bontrager showing interest in your background…

It will become clear.

stop being so frightened of the future, do more with now.

Nothing. I wouldn’t be here, if that guy hadn’t made all the choices he did.

crack on…

Mandy the younger more attractive version of Sandra Bullock you had a one night fling with wanted much much more….

Don’t f***ing look a f***ing gift horse in the mouth, you f***ing dick.

Pretty much covers it.

Downhill maybe cool but youll wish you started xc and road sooner when your 21.

Either go to uni and actually study it don’t bother and get a job. Either is fine. And do some work in your a-levels too, that’s what got you into the uni situation. And ffs talk to Allison, she is both fit and fancied you.

I’d go back and tell my younger self to think seriously about those computer things and how they are not just about games, then go an do a degree in them rather than wasting four years doing biochemistry.

Either that or just tell myself to do whatever and actually live the dream and join the Army straight after graduating.

You don’t have to do what you’re told. Make up your own mind. Don’t listen to your parents and grandparents.

Either go to uni and actually study it [or] don’t bother and get a job. Either is fine.

That is phenomenally good advice.

Not one single minute thing (as crappy as some of them were), as one split second of changed decision in my timeline would have certainly meant that even if I’d still have ended up meeting Mrs STR, then a different tadpole would have noshed it’s way into her eggs and then I wouldn’t have the daughter I do now 🙂

Be more careful when walking on ice

Smoke/drink less.

Ride your bike more – you were actually quite good at it..

I”d become a Firefighter,the ladies love it and it`s a relative doddle.
My best mate and next-door neighbour are both Firefighters so it`s not said from ignorance.

Don’t be so nice, you’ll always be the guy your female pal will moan to about her boyfriend because “you’re such a good listener”

Be nicer to your mum.

Chat less bollocks.

Get a mountain bike.

Don’t splurge all your cash on cars to try and impress the ladies, it doesn’t work.
Don’t get any credit of any sort. See above why.
Save like mad where you can for a house deposit.
For f***s sake ask Gillian out just as you leave school for college.
Don’t be ashamed of riding your bikes, the girls that matter actually like it!!
Avoid Alice like the plague.

Think that would cover it 8)

Make more of the glorious brief time while at uni when magic mushrooms started being widely sold in shops. Ah… Good times… At least once your legs reappeared and the laughing dwarfs had left.

I would have liked to say “Marry Nicola” but then.. well… am I just living in a fantasy world now ??? 😐

She was unbelievably gorgeous, and a truly beautiful person.

I hope she married well.

Listen to the lottery numbers I’m giving you.

Don’t seduce Francesca.

That idea the bank manager said wouldn’t work, do it as others did and you’ll be rich by 26.

Take PEDs, stop taking them in May 1998.

Then retire with a few millions in the bank and half a dozen interesting jerseys on the wall *before* Festina get busted.

(Actually i probably wouldn’t, far too chickenshit. And probably not good enough even with the drugs)

FFS just don’t get bloody caught………………

Stay with Dawn a bit longer as the sex was so worth her mental tantrums.

Dawn who?? I knew a Dawn like that.

Me. Don’t leave the council as a plant fitter to go self employed with Ma & Pa in a petrol station.
Join the RAF or Navy.
Marry your 1st love. (like I did 35 years later) 😆

Teenager:

Stop listening to your parents, they’re not experienced, they’re small minded. You’re not a disgrace to them, you’re an inconvenience, stop trying to please them, you can’t.

You’re better at EVERYTHING than you think you are, stop being afraid.

Food, booze and drugs aren’t making you happy, they’re stopping you feel unhappy for a few moments.

May 25th 2009:

Don’t invest all your redundancy in a partnership with someone looking to exploit you – take the ‘not sensible’ option and spend the summer in the Alps like you wanted too – just make sure you still chat up your wife when you get back in Autumn 😉

Don’t let that 14yr old girl get away. Oh, I didn’t, and she’s still making me happy 47 years later.

^ Post of the year.

Don’t listen to the damn coach stay playing in the centres. Or just play league instead

Study what you want at University, not what others expect. It’s free after all.

Go to travel agents buy round world ticket with that money DO NOT spaff it on booze and drugs. And at least do SOME work at school/uni

1. Dont wait for a friend to overdose in front of you before coming to the conclusion that heroin is a bad idea and trying to sort yourself out

or

2. Keep hold of all the bloody star wars toys!!!!!