crap films

I’m never surprised to see that so many hate Lost in Translation though, despite the fact I really loved it. Great film.

+1

Ooh, the thread takes an interesting new twist. Phantom Menace Effect you say? How about Drive? At the very least I expected a bit more driving in it. Very stylish but mostly a bit dull.

The thing with ” lost in translation “, like broken flowers and other bill murray films is that its just him walking around with his ” ironic face ” – the absolutly shitist has to be ” the life aquatic ” like watching paint refuse to dry .

until you’ve sat through this, you haven’t seen a bad film!

I’ve only ever walked out on one movie – Body of Evidence – god awful

I agree that Nicholas Cage has had some terrible movies lately, but Lord of War and KickAss help him redeem himself

IMO Quantum of Solace is terrible, but its blown away by the collossus of bilge that is GI Joe, Rise of the Cobra…

That or ‘Churchill, The Hollywood years’

‘Vanilla Sky’ is a dreadful film. ‘Eyes wide shut’ is too. ‘Inception’ just has one of those endings that makes me cross because it leaves you hanging. If I wanted that I would just read one of the helmet debates on here.
Most Nicholas Cage fims are rubbish. He tries his hardest to spoil ‘The Rock’ but Sean Connery drags it back for him.
‘PS. I love you’ is soo bad that I can even begin to describe how I felt about it. I was actually please when the bloke died, only to find out that he still popped up from time to time postumously. That was a case of my lovely wife playing film roulette on love film. She has a lot to answer for.
Oh and ‘The Blair witch project’. I got in for free and still walked out. Infact it’s the only film I have ever walked out of.

mr potatohead – Member

the absolutly shitist has to be ” the life aquatic ” like watching paint refuse to dry .

It had its moments. And an ace soundtrack!

For the Nic Cage fans,

4 minutes of Nic Cage losing his rag

Hilarious, disturbing sad. A bit sweary mind

The money train – should have been the cliche train……….terrible.

If you want to see truly awful films where you feel like you’ve been cheated out of hours of your life, simply read the film reviews in the Guardian on a Friday.

If they go into raptures about an Icelandic, subtitled film, shot in black and white by a director hailed as a visionary genius, who you’re supposed to have heard of – DO NOT GO AND SEE IT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES!!!

There’s not even the chance of an exploding helicopter to break the spirit crushing, depressing, hardly lit (noire?) mumble-fest. You have been warned!

Sainsbury’s Basics Cling Film.
– Melts in the microwave.

When at university myself & a few others thought it’d be a laugh to go to the cinema to watch ‘Showgirls’, we went for a couple of beers first, this turned out to be a mistake cos I wanted to go for a wee about 1/2 way through & predictably got a load of abuse from the 20 or so people in the cinema..

Anyway what seemed like a good idea lead us to the most boring film any of us had ever seen & we eventually walked out leaving about 5 people from the original 30-40 people that went in.

Any of the “Twilight” franchise.

I think it’s about expectations with films sometimes. To pick one example Lost In Translation. I was looking forward to being blown away as so many folk rated it, but it was just boring, in my opinion. Perhaps that was what they were after ?

I agree with this. In fact Mark Kermode often talks about audience expectation and has some interesting theories on believing we like certain films when in fact, we don’t.

Northwind I agree about the soundtrack ,in fact I bought the CD, how can you not love Bowie songs in portugese but that as I recall was the only memorable or redeeming feature

For me the worst films are the pointless remakes that miss the point of the origonal, the origonal ” producers ” for example owed a lot to the chemistry between a genuinely petrified gene wilder and a mischevious zero mostell .the remake was like acting by numbers

Oh and ‘The Blair witch project’. I got in for free and still walked out. Infact it’s the only film I have ever walked out of.

That’s a good call. I actually bought The Blurred Witch Project on holiday (NTSC VHS!) and was massively disappointed.

I rarely if ever give up on a film halfway through; I figure that even with the crappest of movies, you might as well see how it ends. With TBWP, despite being less scary than a warm fart after a madras and having thoroughly hateful characters that frankly deserved to be killed off, I stuck with it to the end to find that the damn thing just stops. HULK SMASH!

Terrible movie. But still not as bad as Open Water.

I think to find Blair Witch scary you probably had to have been lost and clueless in the woods at least once, to get that feeling of hysteria/paranoia where everything seems weird and terrifying. I didn’t like a lot about that film but I did get quite into those bits.

Only film i’ve walked out of at the cinema is ‘perfect stranger’

still have no idea why i walked in in the first place.

I could only watch 10 minutes of Mama Mia, but apparently that’s actually a good film.

I also didn’t like A Few Good Men, didn’t manage to finish that one either.

And I am usually disappointed by scary films. I liked the first Amityville (although I watched that when I was quite young), since then i haven’t been scared by scary films. That was after reading the book, that’s better than the film.

I liked the first Paranormal Activity, watched that when my wife was on a hen weekend and scared myself a little.

I think to find Blair Witch scary you probably had to have been lost and clueless in the woods at least once, to get that feeling of hysteria/paranoia where everything seems weird and terrifying. I didn’t like a lot about that film but I did get quite into those bits.

My wife and I watched that in the cinema when we were first going out, I later learned that she gets terrified of scary films and it possibly wasn’t a good film to take her to.

She spent the whole film thinking it was real.

It didn’t go down well when I switched the car lights off on the way home while driving through some woods. She’s been scared of woods ever since.

I on the other hand spent the entire film irritated by the teary, snotty woman, and I was dying for a wee. But the now wife was holding my hand so I stayed squirming in my seat.

when we were first going out

I switched the car lights off on the way home while driving through some woods.

And she didnt run away screaming? Or is that what the gaffer tape and cable ties were for?

Sliding Doors: Dogbert: I rather enjoyed sliding doors as we had been to the pub and I was quite tired. Had a lovely sleep and woke up just as the credits were rolling – perfect. I’ve seen it (or as much as I could be bothered with) on telly since and it’s definitely better with eyelids down.

The Happening: Absolutely dull as ditchwater but at least you’ve got the customary M KNight Shamalyan twist to look forward to. Oh, there isn’t one….

Chronicles of Riddick: Terrible….Pitch Black was great. How could they drop the ball so badly?

gone in 60 seconds (and all the others like this): Utter pap. Can’t you just watch Jeremy Clarkson if you like cars?

XXX: Just rubbish. Give me Johnny English any day.

Casino Royale: (the new one) Can’t watch that new bond guy…like watching a piece of wood for 2 hours….

Anything with Superheros in: People seem to like these but I just can’t find anything engaging in the “amazing special powers but with an achillies heel!” plots. I like the original batman though (the 60’s one)

Any of those new puberty films with vampires: complete arse.

Definitely Highlander 5 here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=tWkPBt_qgu8#t=233s

Usually enjoy crap films, that one really pained me though 😕