crap films

Had a think & here goes….

Shark in Venice.
Rubber.
Any of the Scary Movie/Epic Movie ‘Spoofs’
Zombie Vs Ninja
Saw II onwards
Hostel
Human Centipede

All of the Nicolas Cage films I have ever seen.
what about con air?

Yep, utter garbage.
Can’t imagine what Highlander 5 is like. Me and the wife walked out of Highlander (1)! Thats the worst film I have seen at the cinema.

I think Nicolas Cage did some decent films in his younger days no?

*checks IMDB*…

…

Yep…

Birdy
Leaving Las Vegas
Raising Arizona wasn’t bad either…

But yeah, everything in the 21st century has been utter crap.

Lost in Translation
Highlander – I lasted 5 mins into the gymnastics in the car park and gave up
Aeon Flux for the same reason
Elf
Terminator 3 – although I thought that Terminator Salvation was ok

Melancholia .

You watch the earth get obliterated in the opening titles by a massive rogue planet then spend two and a half hours watching an upper class family being miserable who it is impossible to like or sympathise with until finally you get to the bit from the titles. Not even Kirsten Dust could salvage it.

All of the Nicolas Cage films I have ever seen.

What about Wild At Heart?

Although I have seen Ghost Rider: Spirit if Vengeance and Justice int he last couple of weeks, so I see your point.

I still stand by these as the biggest pile of pap I’ve had the misfortune to watch:

Anything with Mila Jovovich in it – Aeon Flux, Ultraviolet, Resident Evil etc etc.
+1 for lost in translation
has anyone mentioned A.I? Good lord, thats 2 hours or so i’ll never get back.
Have to say though, i really enjoyed Inception!
Oh, and Phantom Menace, purely for ruining the Star Wars franchise. I could happily strangle Jaja bloody Binks and if Anakin says “Yippee!” one more time…..

Anything with Mila Jovovich in it

Dunno, thought the Fifth Element was a great film, not really noticed her in anything else.

Lost in Translation, I just didn’t get at all.

Just because I saw it yesterday. ‘Goon’ is absolutely bloody awful. Steer well clear.

Love Film is great but I do end up adding all sorts of crap to my list.

My all time most hated film is Batman and Robin. Even as a 12 year old comic book fan I was devastated when I went to see it. No words can quite describe just how terrible it actually is.

Life Cycles. just watched it on youtube. i’m glad that i didn’t spend money on it….

Contagion – bird flu renamed and made even more uneventfull than any one could ever imagine.
Eyes Wide Shut – just for the piano that constantly dongs at every opportunity, seriously drove me nuts to the point i had to turn it off 3/4 of the way through the film.

Nicolas Cage was also in The Rock, this allows him to make 10 bad films before he can be slated….. sadly he has passed that point.
Cant stand the Harry potter films (never see all of one yet), just never could understand why they are so popular.
Apart from the first 2 star wars films, I also try to avoind anything directed or producewd by George Lucas although I have a soft spot for Howard the Duck.

any action movie made after 1976

You guys just don’t seem to be scraping the barrel enough.
Having just watched Sharktopus the other night offshore, I’m now have to wait for another quiet night and see how it weighs up against Dinoshark
Oh yeah!!!

I have a soft spot for Howard the Duck.

Thank gods it’s not just me. It’s a universally hated film, and I really quite like it.

john_drummer – Member

Highlander – I lasted 5 mins into the gymnastics in the car park and gave up

Interesting. Purely for research purposes I think you should watch Highlander 2 and see what happens.

Inception
Superbad (the film that reviews itself)
That 3D thing with the blue people in it…seriously the name escapes me.

You haven’t watched properly bad films. Inception is startling average for a film, and slightly above average for a big Hollywood film. Avatar is a complete blatant copy of other films, but again, slightly above average for a big Hollywood film.

I quite enjoyed Superbad, but then it is for a certain age group.

Someone mentioned The Tree Of Life. Yeah, that was awful. And god did it drag on.

Hanna stands as one of the worst films I’ve ever seen. Don’t watch it. Just really don’t.

2001: A Space Odyssey is also awful. It’s like 1.5 hours of dullness, 1 hour of stuff that makes no sense at all, and 10 minutes of awesomeness done incredibly badly. Such a great idea for a film, how could you do it so badly. Watch Moon instead.

Stuff like Dinoshark, Hobo with a Shotgun, Drive Angry, et al are kinda meant to be bad, and they are fun to watch, so can’t really put in this category IMO.

Controversial but I thought The Prestige was awful, and not just because Christian Bale was in it.

Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol and Captain America are probably some of the worst Hollywood films I’ve ever seen, and I don’t really know how I kidded myself into believing they were going to be worth watching.

I also can’t stand Mulholland Drive and Vanilla Sky type films. The first things you get taught when writing fiction at school is don’t end it with “…and he/she woke up and it was all dream”. Because that sucks. So don’t do it in films please.

Also this I feel is meant to be silly[/url] and I don’t think they were really going for the Oscars, but it’s a whole new level of awful I’ve not really seen before (although still not as bad as Hanna).

Skyline.

So, so horrible.

You haven’t watched properly bad films.

Oh don’t worry laddy, I have.

no such thing as a crap film if somebody out there enjoys it. all subjective innit blud.

The worst film I’ve sat through recently was Twilight. Words cannot describe how awful I thought it was, but as Phil says above its all subjective. The missus thinks its brilliant and I’m just too shallow to “get it”.

The Seventh Seal.

Many years ago my Dad insisted the family watch it on video, as he felt we lacked culture. No-one was allowed to move or speak. Long, grim black & white film about the Black Death.

Worst. Christmas. Afternoon. Ever.

What’s the current blockbuster of the moment? Cos I’m going to say I walked out after 5 minutes just to get me some attention 😉

What’s the current blockbuster of the moment? Cos I’m going to say I walked out after 5 minutes just to get me some attention

From what you tweet that you’re about to watch sometimes, it’s going to have to be really shit.

God this is bringing back memories I thought I’d successfully hidden away in some scarred over part of my brain.

Sliding doors, I’ve never walked out of a cinema but it was close with that, infact I took the piss so much the girl I was with nearly had me removed, she seemed to like it.

Quite subjective innit, I saw most of twilight the other week on TV when mrs decided she wanted to watch it. Sat through it coz I was knackered and CBA doing owt else. Didn’t think it was a truly awful film but thinking back I can’t remember any redeeming features. If you sit down to watch a movie or (dear god no) pay to go to cinema and it sucks you remember it, if it’s just on in the background I don’t think it really offends you that much. Borat possibly being an exception, managed to offend me whilst trying not to watch it.

Squidlord – your dad sounds cool !! My dad used to make me listen to classical music.

no such thing as a crap film if somebody out there enjoys it.

Of course there is.

thats like saying there’s crap art or crap music… one man’s crap is another man’s JLS.

Oh god, I’d forgotten about the twilight movies, also had the misfortune to watch g I Joe on film four a while back.

That had truly awful acting & even worse special effects.

Green lantern was also poop.

There is a finely balanced point where a film is so crap that it becomes strangely entertaining.

The worst possible films are the ones that fall only just short of that tipping point. This….

is a fine example of such. A mate brought it round to watch. We turned it off half way through. She was very embarrassed and apoligised profusely for wasting an hour of our lives. FFS you wouldn’t think you could go wrong with staring at Angelina Jolie for an hour! 😉

Aliens is in fact one of the best films ever made in both the With Spaceships and Not With Spaceships categories.

For that alone, I will be asking your film advice from now on.

😀

Atomic Train…..
2 hours of my life I will never, ever get back. Truely rubbish but then it is a Rob Lowe film!
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0144039/

From what you tweet that you’re about to watch sometimes, it’s going to have to be really shit.

Yes, I’ll admit to a certain fascination with bad films. Some kind of morbid curiosity as to how bad a film can be means I quite enjoy them for their awfulness. Probably explains why I’ve never walked out of a crap film but seen plenty.

I’m still undecided about actually buying Battlefield Earth, simply to see if it actually IS as awful as people say. The more terrible it is the less I’ll regret buying it 🙂

Dune is another awful film.. so bad they actually state on the back of the DVD case how awful it is. No really! They did 🙂

Bruno. Simply unfunny and a bitter disappointment after Borat. If it got better towards the end I didn’t bother finding out

A flatmate of mine many years ago was obsessed with John Waters films. The King of So Bad They are Good. OK maybe the Prince, Russ Meyers was the King.

Your homework tonite young persons is to watch Faster Pussycat Kill, Kill and Pink Flamingos, then report back. No spaceships in either of those.

@Mark, just realised absence of smiley on that post may have implied seriousness.

Rapid fire with Brandon Lee…. unsure how I got sucked into watching it the other night but it was dismal.

Shame how he died in real life though.

Its’ OK DD I sort of assumed it was there 🙂

Skyline was truly awful in a disappointing way – I really wanted it to be good. Mind you, once we realised how terrible it was we started to play ‘script cliche bingo’ which passed the time with some giggles to the end.

Good thread this. If nothing else it just confirms (what we already know) that film is utterly subjective.

So many films in peoples lists that I absolutely adore. I could never argue with anyones point of view of course because of the subjectivity.

I’m never surprised to see that so many hate Lost in Translation though, despite the fact I really loved it. Great film.

I think it’s about expectations with films sometimes. To pick one example Lost In Translation. I was looking forward to being blown away as so many folk rated it, but it was just boring, in my opinion. Perhaps that was what they were after ?

Anyway so it rates even lower, for that alone.

Let’s call it the Phantom Menace effect.