Cats destroying my garden

They shit on the lawn.
They scratch the garden furniture.
…and my wife has just phoned to say that one of the little sods has made a mess of the kids’ swing by using it as a scratching post.

Time to buy yet more cat pepper and chicken wire to wrap round my stuff.

I hate cats.

Get a cat, that’ll sort it.

I hate cats

It appears they don’t like you either

See the ‘What air pistols…” thread 😆

Mark you own territory; start pissing on the garden furniture & kids swing

Smear everything in fox poo, that’ll sort the cat problem.

you’re welcome.

We managed to get rid of cats coming into our garden by getting a couple of cats.

Not only do they keep the other cats from crapping on our lawn, but they also keep my lap warm at this time of year too.

cats. rats. any bats in your garden as well?

think yourself lucky you’ve not got two of the little **** in your house.

(did she really ring you at work to give you a cat damage update?)

They’ll also crap on your neighbours lawn, not your own.

Though usually cats dig a hole and bury it, not just dump on the lawn, unlike dogs. Though cut the grass regularly, else they may think it’s deep enough to hide the crap.

by getting a couple of cats.

What you need is large aggressive cats (probably male)

cats. rats. any bats in your garden as well?

all wearing spats, the little ****

(did she really ring you at work to give you a cat damage update?)

It was in a “can you nip to B&Q at lunch to get some cat poison” context.

I have the poison. Tonight the cat gets it.

be careful poisoning pets.
(you’re not seriously planning to kill someone’s cat are you?}

Yeah. Make sure you wash your hands.

B&Q sell cat poison?????

If a cat came into my garden, I believe its fair game! I live in Africa people don’t have cats they get eaten by the locals!

I feel your pain but careful what you type on a public forum

(you’re not seriously planning to kill someone’s cat are you?}

Nah. I’ve got some cat pepper. I’ll make it go and ruin somebody else’s garden.

Chuck Norris would have done it differently though.

Have you tried the lion dung pellets? Silent Roar I think. It’s a strong scent, so you scatter them around the perimeter of your garden.

Saves you getting in trouble for killing your neighbours pets.
noted above – no cat massacre going on – phew

I’ve got 2 boy cats. They make a huge deal about seeing off any other cats, then come back in all puffed up like they’ve done a good deed.

Why not just rig up a small sprinkler system that you can turn on or off . You get to water the garden effectively in the summer and the added bonus of soaking the cats when you get the chance. I use a couple of more basic methods

1) I corner the little gits in my garden using the hose pipe and drench them

2) I entice them in with a couple of strokes then get a glass of water straight in the face while being held by me.

Both seem to be very effective

My 20yr old cat is now past patrolling the garden so she just sits there and watches these days

Rabbits

A male Westie, cats hated ours. Especially the one he caught 😯

Oops – ninja edit:

Nah. I’ve got some cat pepper. I’ll make it go and ruin somebody else’s garden.

As you all were.

There should be cat tax whereby all owners are charged to provide anti-cat measures for the communities they live in.

PJM… See my later post.

“cat poison” is what we call it in our house as we love spending time and money clearing up the mess left by other people’s pets

I’d love to hear any current deterrents. Our area is over run with cats. and I’ve stood in their poop a few times in the grass.

I love stroking the little feckers but not the contents of their ass’es.

If you have far too much time on your hands try this

teatree oil.

that’ll be £500 please.

teatree oil.

that’ll be £500 please.

That’s a lot of T tree 😯 😉

consultancy fees innit bro.

sonic cat repeller does the job for me
http://www.amazon.co.uk/STV-STV610-Mega-Sonic-Cat-Repeller/dp/B000NR8Q1U

Paint ball gun.
Freeze the paint balls.

They actually work do they Gonzy?
Hmmm… If the rat poison and tuna fish surprise cat pepper doesn’t sort it I may have to make a purchase. I’m utterly sick of the little fecker messing my garden up.

In our previous house, there was a large cat that used to come into our garden, generally act as if he owned the place and bullied our own cat.
I found that a pint glass full of cold water in reach and a confident throwing action soon sent it packing.
The car started off completely non-plussed by me approaching it from across the garden, followed by a degree of shock as I opened my initial salvo. Over the next few days/weeks I got better at ‘spreading’ the water over a large enough area that it was very rare he didn’t get a soaking. Watching him scrabble/balance/run along the top of the neighbours fence while trying to remain gracefully cat like in his escape was highly amusing.
Eventually he decided it was easier to just stay clear.

I’ve got two cats and if they were marauding around other neighbours gardens I would be happy with a similar level of repelling force!
Presley ventures into the neighbours kitchen and I have told them they should feel free giving him a swift kick up the arse if he is causing problems.

There should be cat tax

Crapital gains?

Cats bury their crap.
Yeah right.
Pint of water in the face worked to terrorise the little deckers out of my garden. Chasing them up the road helped to terrorise the owner as well.

Strange how different this is to the foxes in back garden all the time thread isn’t it?

Nerf gun people keep telling yer current fav the big 50cal style sniper rifle doesn’t do them any harm(ish) and even if you miss the whistling dart scare the living daylights out of them plus it’s big old load of fun 👿

this worked for me…

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B005MW9VOM?psc=1&redirect=true&ref_=oh_aui_detailpage_o01_s00

move it around for a few weeks and the cats soon move on – then leave it out every so often just to keep them on their toes

Cats don’t bury crap. Next doors are happy to crap on our door step.
Every cat I’ve ever met hates me and the feeling is mutual.