Are National Highways genuinely useless?

I guess the person who planned that is the same person who planned the diversion signs in Stafford.  We've got about 4 sets of works and closures, about half the diversion signs required, but each one just has an arrow and "Diverted Traffic" on.  So you can just go round in circles until you run out of fuel.

I vote yes!, last year we needed to close Junction 29a southbound offslip on a Saturday evening so some resurfacing work could be carried out on the junction roundabout. National Highways delayed us putting the closure on for around 2 hours because something unforeseen had happened on the M1 around 70 miles to the South of us.

Yes, I've had to deal with them on DCO applications. Makes anything described above seem competent and well thought out.

What sort of person plans the overnight closure of the northbound carriageways of both the A1 and the M1 at the same time?

"The finest"

It’s really hard to look up planned works as well.

Certainly whoever was involved with the diversion signing around Reading when the M4 was closed at night between J10-11. I ended up heading back east towards London three times because the signs just seemed to disappear and my satnav (TomTom on my phone connected to my car via cable) just couldn’t show me a route to the M4 heading west on the other side of Reading.
I was getting ever more frustrated and angry, trying to find clear directions, because I’m not at all familiar with the roads around Reading, I think I’ve been there two or three times in my life, so I don’t know the area at all.

Eventually I found myself behind a van that seemed to be heading in the right direction, so stayed behind it, and several other vehicles joined the convoy, and ultimately I started to see diversion signs, and my satnav picked up the route. I didn’t get home until 3am, I lost around 45 minutes because of the farce that was the Highways signing.

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M23 heading for the ferry end of July we get off for a wee stop at a small services at a junction with roundabout.  Leave the services to get back on and the exit slip is completely blocked off and the detour is over 30 minutes through the next town. No prior warning and this on one of the busiest tourist routes on one of the busiest weekend of the year when everyone is going to have worked out their route and time planning based on a couple of 10 minute stops.  We weren't late for the ferry but we couldn't get on the earlier one that we'd hoped to.

Eventually I found myself behind a van that seemed to be heading in the right direction, so stayed behind it,

"His method of "Zen" navigation, which was simply to find any car that looked as if it knew where it was going and follow it. The results were more often surprising than successful, but he felt it was worth it for the sake of the few occasions when it was both."

Ah yes @BigJohn, the Stafford roadworks are almost laughable. Baswich Lane now being one way means all sorts of fun taking the kids to school (we could walk it but my wife drops them off on the way to work before the moral crusaders start).

On the plus side I've been running errands round town on my old beater bike which is fun.

Yes, I’ve had to deal with them on DCO applications

What scheme(s)?

Some of the TM around at the moment is hopeless.  There are so many TM companies cutting each other's throats for the business that the 'quality' suffers.

Following someone else as a means of navigation is not reccomended.
I was cycling to work and the road was blocked so I turned down a small lane.

I became aware that quite a few cars were following me.

Unfortunately the road ends in a pedestrian bridge over the Mersey.
Great for bikes but not for cars.

Some of the TM around at the moment is hopeless. There are so many TM companies cutting each other’s throats for the business that the ‘quality’ suffers.

Indeed.
One such set managed to block hundreds of cars into Cameron Toll shopping centre are the weekend. Fire two hours.
And refused to turn out to sort the problem.

“His method of “Zen” navigation, which was simply to find any car that looked as if it knew where it was going and follow it. The results were more often surprising than successful, but he felt it was worth it for the sake of the few occasions when it was both.”

Now that's a niche literary reference!

Douglas Adams isn't exactly niche.

Smart motorways run by absolute numb skulls.

Dirk Gently might be a little more niche than HHGTTG

Although most of us on here appear to have got it