Had a text off an old family friend saying they couldn't get hold of my step dad.
Rang my (half) sister (his daughter) and she hadn't heard from him for a few days.
Headed up to my childhood home fearing the worst.
Saw through the window that the fridge freezer was tipped over and on entering the house found his emaciated body on the kitchen floor.
I'll not go into the farce that ensued with the emergency services apart from five callbacks asking the same questions, waiting three hours for two Chinese guys who, to all intents and purposes, looked like they were on work experience to turn up, look at him from a bit of a distance and say they couldn't see why he died so they were going to call the police (he was very frail and had severe COPD). He'd quite obviously had a cardiac arrest.
Understandably the police said they weren't coming and we thankfully were allowed to call in the funeral directors.
Six and a half hours later, I'm in bed with a glass of wine, my sister is sort of ok - thankfully she didn't have to see her dad on the floor and I'm reflecting on a rather unpleasantly surreal experience
am very sorry to hear that, my condolences to you and your family.
Try to relax,you obviously did your best.Perhaps have a read in bed to take your mind of things.Tomorrow will take care of itself.Good luck.
That's a bit shit, sorry to hear it. I hope it was quick and painless for him.
... I woke up this morning to find an email my Dad had sent 12 hours previously asking me to call him. Old people seem to be hardwired to thinking international calls cost millions so he never just calls me. His list of ailments seems to be growing so every time he does this I expect I'll be needing to head to the airport soon after, so i call expecting the worst, but it wasn't, this time.
I’m sorry for your loss.
However, the positives, he was in his own home, he went quickly, it sounds like he was living independently despite COPD. He’s got people around him who realised something was up.
As a way out it’s one of the best.
I hope you’re okay, it sounds like as far as days go it’s right up there with one of the worst, so it’s time to get the family round.
I hope I haven’t got the tone of this message wrong.
sorry for your loss and well done for sorting it out
on a slightly inappropriate note (hidden in spoiler tags in case you didn’t want to see anything inappropriate)
i skim read and thought you said “six hours later and im in bed with my sister”. I’ve heard about those films
Ah, that sucks, I'm sorry for your loss, hope your sister is OK.
That’s awful news, sorry to hear that.
Sorry to hear that, you don't need an extra level of trauma on top of loosing a parent.
You appear to have coped though far better than I would have.
Sorry to hear that, it sounds a horrid experience and really not helped by the actions of others.
Look after yourself in the coming days. Shock can sneak up on you and others so keep checking in with loved ones and yourself.
Understandably the police said they weren't coming and we thankfully were allowed to call in the funeral directors.
I'm rather baffled by this bit; unless the law's changed recently, an unknown cause of death, where a doctor hasn't seen him recently, should be referred to the coroner. Saying he'd "obviously" had a cardiac arrest may be correct, but is hardly the diagnosis for a layman to make.
Blimey, that is crap. Sorry for your loss.
Yikes, that's not a pleasant experience. Sorry for your loss.
Very sorry to hear what youve had to deal with.
Sorry for your loss. Condolenses to family and friends.
That's a traumatic day, I'm sorry for your loss I hope that any issues are quickly cleared up. Look after yourself through this difficult time.
Understandably the police said they weren't coming and we thankfully were allowed to call in the funeral directors.
I'm rather baffled by this bit; unless the law's changed recently, an unknown cause of death, where a doctor hasn't seen him recently, should be referred to the coroner. Saying he'd "obviously" had a cardiac arrest may be correct, but is hardly the diagnosis for a layman to make.
It doesn't *have* take police involvement though to refer to the coroner. It often does but it's not mandatory.
In this particular case it may be the funeral director or even the family who refer to the coroner when looking to get the death certificate.
TBH, the funeral directors were fully informed of the course of events and I'm pretty sure they wouldn't have taken the body unless it was ok to do so.
Thanks for all your kind words.
That's horrible. Take care of yourself.
Aww, that's a really tough day that's clearly made worse by not feeling like the 'system' had your or dad's interests at heart.
Sorry for your loss.
