Right I know quite a bit about these as had the same issues on two pairs.
Unfortunately even set up and bled perfectly they do run fairly close to the bars.
Like you, I prefer instant bite with minimal lever travel.
What helps is this :
1) do a quick bleed of the lever with the reach adjustment all the way out (longest throw) and wind the pad adjust (little screw under the rubber cover at the Base of the lever) out about 3 full turns.
2) advance the pads slightly. Remove wheel and pump lever once. Check pistons extend equally and then reinstall wheel. This is temporary as the pistons will return to their “happy place”.
What really helps though is to replace the hydraulic hose to slx/xt mtb hose. This stuff is much stiffer than the stuff that comes on the oem brakes. Bh90 hose as opposed to bh59. Because the hose is stiffer, there is less modulation and the lever feel improved for me dramatically.
I had a long reply from shimano tech suggesting the above.
It’s a shame as they are amazing brakes but need a bit of fiddling to get lever where you want.