Neighbour's junk ruining my view…

Neighbour over the back has recently cut down a tree in his garden, which sadly means we are now treated to a princely view from our kitchen window of the fat bugger waving his wedding tackle around as he gets dressed in his bedroom.

The concept of curtains and blinds seems somewhat lost on him.

Any tips for putting an end to this glorious peep show?

Thread needs pictures…?

No, no, no. no. NO!

I had the same problem,posted about it on here and Junkyard said he had let him see him rubbing himself while he was enjoying the view,which had stopped the problem.

Laser pen.

Nothing would make you shut your curtains quicker than having your tadger being targeted by a sniper.

Laser pen

YES!

I did jury service for someone being prosecuted for waving his todger around in similar circumstances, though with slightly less gardening involved.

Tell him you can see him (it) and if he doesn’t stop, tell the Police. Child’s face etc…

Now if it were his 18 year old daughter…

You realise you don’t have to watch, right?

scorecards?

Pop an anonymous note through his letterbox.*

(* not a euphemism)

The concept of curtains and blinds seems somewhat lost on him.

… and you.

We lived the other year in a 5th floor flat, which had a view of the back of a terrace. One old lad used to go out the back door and stand there **** while his wife was in the kitchen.

That was odd…

I did jury service for someone being prosecuted for waving his todger around in similar circumstances, though with slightly less gardening involved.
Tell him you can see him (it) and if he doesn’t stop, tell the Police.

IANAL, but I don’t think that would work. I’m pretty sure it has to be proven that he is naked with the intention of causing offence, or something, which would be very hard to prove indeed, in his own house. Unless he was, y’know, doing a bit more than just walking around.

So, stop looking seems a good answer. Although a note probably wouldn’t go amiss, he’d probably not be too happy that he’s strutting his stuff unintentionally… Personally, I’d generally be a little averse to deliberately aiming lasers at other men’s penises, but whatever floats your boat I suppose…

I tend to strip naked in my back garden after a ride. I ‘think’ the shrubs/trees are preventing neighbourly views, but they are now looking a bit thin. No-one has mentioned anything…

I suppose if I was causing any offence, I would like to be told.

Laser pen.

Likes 😀

Or maybe a bat symbol projector of some kind?

You realise you don’t have to watch, right?

It’s strangely compelling. Well, not actually, but what I’ve seen already cannot be unseen, any more glimpses of the underworld may cause mental scarring.

As for me having the put the blinds down, I would say the onus is on the nekkid person to pull down the shutters, as it were.

How can you be sure your neighbour isn’t blind and doesn’t realise the trees have gone? Your post makes the stereotypical non-disabled assumptions with worrying undertones of black Jewish gypsy homosexual lesbian whale-lover hatred as well.

Whack a leylandii in at the end of your garden.

Then topiary it into the shape of a big old wang.

Should send the right message I think. 8)

Fat middle-aged Yorkshiremen are one of the least-protected minorities out there.

whale-lover hatred

<Rings Japanese Embassy, browses Ebay for harpoons>

When you pass him in the street in your car waggle your pinky finger at him.

Just video him. Put it on Youtube (with bits pixelated) then share it on here. When it gets 1000+ views send him a card with the URL on it.

OP, how many times a day does he get dressed? Do you just stare at his window daily just to catch him in his birthday suit? Maybe stop staring into his house?

It’s quite hard to avoid it ‘catching your eye’ when it’s the only light on opposite while I’m doing the washing up. This morning he had the blind half pulled down, which meant that only his nethers were parading across my eyeline, like some bizarre art installation.

But you’re right, I shall not raise my eyes from the dishes in future…

He’s trying to hypnotise you with his junk!

He’s trying to hypnotise you with his junk!

“look into my eye……” 😳

How low are his windows that you can see anything below waist level from your kitchen ?

How low are his windows that you can see anything below waist level from your kitchen ?

Low enough. I only need to go halfway up the stepladder.

Brilliant 😀

video camera on zoom, hooked up to a giant screen placed in your window so he can see what you see?

You might think the onus is on him, but you’d be wrong. Nothing wrong with being naked in your own house, thank goodness. Stop looking or you might find the police are more interested in your activities as a peeping tom.

Don’t do the washing up – problem solved!

Yep, good excuse for a dishwasher i’d say.

Definitely do the laser pen thing though, that’d be great!!

How about a brazillion lumens lamp aimed at his bedroom window. Every time he gets nekkid turn on the lamp. That might get the message across….

You might think the onus is on him, but you’d be wrong. Nothing wrong with being naked in your own house, thank goodness.

You don’t live in east Skipton, do you, cap’n? 🙂

I’m just going to send the wife out into the garden to point and laugh. I know how humiliating it is when she does that.

You might think the onus is on him, but you’d be wrong. Nothing wrong with being naked in your own house, thank goodness. Stop looking or you might find the police are more interested in your activities as a peeping tom.

Just as there is nothing wrong with being naked in your own house, there is also nothing wrong with looking out of your own Windows.

Peeping Tom 😆

Tell him, or send the missus I think the line if I had one like that I wouldn’t bother showing it off is a good one

Looking out of your window is fine, looking into someone else’s window to have a peep at their willy is not.

bigyinn – Member
How about a brazillion

😯 – I suppose they could sugggest it

Nothing wrong with being naked in your own house

Depends who’s looking

http://www.dailypost.co.uk/news/north-wales-news/sealand-man-admits-flashing-denies-10526280

Do you live in a Victorian house, OP?

According to Planning magazine:
The Edwardians first introduced standards for minimum distances between main house windows.
They were built 22m apart so that a gentleman’s wife’s nipples would not be visible from next door.