Any good office practical jokes?

It’s that time of year when things start to slow down in the office and there is only so many websites that you can check on a work computer. Therefore the office practical jokes have begun, so far we have had:

Changing the keys around on the keyboard
Taping the telephone receiver down…

Does anyone have any good ones???

Riding 2 abreat down a dual carriageway at 6 mph.

Drivers always see the funny side!

You did say orifice, didn’t you?

take a screenshot on a colleagues computer of their normal desktop background full of icons, task bar etc etc. set it as the background then hide the task bar, icons etc and sit back as they try clicking on a jpeg to get things to open.

Remove ball/Tape over the optical sensor on the mouse.

Take a screenprint of someone’s desk top.
Move all Icons to a folder, ideally in the same location with the same name as an existing one.
Set desk top image to be the screenprint of their desk top.
Hey presto – Clicky fail!

Swap the mouse button functions so it works left-handed.

Damnit! Beaten to it by Philomena!

ctrl-alt-left arrow (or right, or down) to rotate the desk top.

CTRL-ALT and the arrow buttons always used to rotate the screen view in Windows.

Edit – dang.

disconnect the brake fluid pump of your colleague’s car
Take all but one screw out of the banister on the top floor of the office stairs, spread fairy liquid on the edge of the top few steps
Bleach in the water cooler
Rig a remote activation device to a powder fire extinguisher hidden in a filing cabinet so it goes off in their faces when the drawer is opened.

a laff a minute.

sorry flashy!

if your computers sit back to back in the office swap the mouse cables so you plug your mouse into the back of a colleagues computer… ideal if they’re USB and you can leave theirs plugged in, gently and slowly moving it about whilst they retain some kinda control 😀

These are great keep em coming.

If anyone is drinking from a tin can, punch a small hole in it 2 cm below the mouth piece and watch it dribble all over them

Ones I did once:

Copy the desktop and create it as the background. Remove icons and start menu.
Leave a post it note for a manager to call C.Lyons (number for Bristol Zoo)
Leave a post it to call Liz (number for Buckinham palace)

Get your balaclava on and kidnap one of your colleagues at gunpoint! bundle them into a car and take them to a deserted location and torture them.

Alternatively, do The Office thang and set their staplers etc in jelly

CS spray in Billy’s sandwiches is always popular in our office.

Can’t help but think of this.

Rubbing a black ink pad on the back of a black mouse used to be popular at my work until they got rid of the ink pads

BSOD Screen Saver

Smear fairy liquid (or oil if you can get it) on the toilet seats.

Have a Bobby Sands style dirty protest on someones desk

attached a mouse to the back of my mates pc (on my desk). Wiggled it occasionally. As soon as he called someone over to look, the wiggling stopped. Went on for about 2 weeks before we told him

Not really an office jape, but when i used to be a chef, our restaurant manager didn’t stop going on about his new car, so we got a 80 litre plastic bucket, attached his car keys on a piece of thread from a wooden dowel across the top, filled it with water and placed it in walk in freezer.

At the end of the night we handed him a metre high block of ice with his car keys in the middle and went home!

Office jousting (waste paper baskets on head optional.)

shaving foam / gel / sommat sticky on the telephone ear piece and phone ’em up

The year before I joined they had races around the shop floor on swively chairs after the store closed on christmas eve

Another classic was to shorten the cord of the telephone and then ring them up from across the office and watch the phone smack them in the face.

pilfered from FHM – office longjump

find an doorway that can be covered with parcel paper or similar, dark enough to not be transparent.

tell your colleague the game is to jump from behind the paper and land as far as they can from the door.

do this for a few days, recording results on the floor using marker tape

tell him that today is “the big one” and to make a special effort for this jump.

close the door.

NB. anyone daft enough to try this accepts all liabilities for the damages that will occur…

Tradition states that whoever gets a certain guy (Craig) in my office in the secret santa dip has to buy him something total crap or a wind-up present

2008

He’d been trying to sell a rabbit cage for ages on our intranet. He was asking for £20. My boss then got him in the secret santa and got someone else in the company to buy the rabbit cage but managed to barter him down to £10 with a sob story about buying it for her niece and all she could afford was a tenner. Craig spent weeks moaning about this and he was raging he didn’t get the full £20 for it. The day comes along when we have to exchange presents and my boss brings in the massive rabbit cage all wrapped up. Craig get’s genuinely excited when he sees the size of it and realises it’s for him.

The look on his face when he unwrapped it and realised what he’d got was absolutely priceless.

2009

I get him and buy him a box full of tat from the poundshop

2010

I get him again and buy him a bottle of vodka. Except I’ve poured the vodka out and replaced it with water. All year I’ve been waiting on him coming in one day and saying the vodka was crap, but that day never comes…

2011

My boss got him this year and bought him something crap, but I’d kept the vodka from last year and stored it in the bottle of water I’d decanted last year. He unwraps it and looks a bit puzzled as to why he’s got a 3/4 full bottle of mineral water. We explain what we did and he looks a bit pale as he admits he had given the bottle of “vodka” from last year away as a present to someone else 😆

Sticky label over the laser of a mouse, or clear tape.
Change the layout of the keyboard physically and change the region settings.
Change mouse sensitivity, add mouse trails.

Empty the clippings from the office hole-punches into someone’s umbrella.

Empty the clippings from the office hole-punches into someone’s umbrella.

For a festive twist, put them in the vents of their car ventilation system. Set controls to max fan speed. Direct vents towards drivers face.

On starting the engine the next time they get in, hey presto, instant festive snowstorm.

Big pile of paper on someone’s desk with a post-it note:
“I need this done by 5pm tonight. This deadline CANNOT be extended.”
Do not leave a name on the note.

mobile phone in ceiling tile. ring it.

set autocorrect to change the spelling of words automatically.

Change language settings on mobile phones to Norwegian/Arabic/Swahili etc.

Shrinkwrap their car, use several rolls. Might be a bit harsh if they’re in it at the time.

@boardingbob – classic with the rabbit cage, i can imagine that would have been hilarious.

Tape up the lever on his chair that lets you move it up and down (will sit at max height then drop to the bottom when someone sits on it).