Out on the pop in the middle of Cardiff, next thing I know I’m wading thru a stream in the countryside, worked out later that I’d walked past my digs and carried on completely out of the city.

Decided at closing time that a lampost climbing competition was a good idea with the winner being the person the fastest up and down, I got to the top and figured that letting go would be the quickest way of getting down, woke up in an ambulance wearing an oxygen mask.

On the same lampost theme won a bet on climbing the one of those big 60 foot ones in the middle of a dual carriageway.

…the boss’ daughter.

The boss – well over twice my age…

johndoh – Member
Set fire to a disabled (quadriplegic) girl in a wheelchair in a nightclub.

Worst-thing-you’ve-done-when-drunk. Winner.

I take my job very seriously but most of my drunken exploits seem to have happened after working at weddings as a photographer. The most memorable involved shooting a destination wedding (no need to drive home), being plied with drink from the free bar by the groom’s father, getting chatted up by one of the bridesmaids, sleeping with her (and I do mean sleeping – I’d had at least 14 pints and fell asleep on the job), waking up in the morning and finding I’d pissed all over the bed.

Sadly, it turned out that this was the same bridesmaid I had to give a lift to the next morning – it was a loooooong, silent four hour car trip.

My least proud moment though, involved a whole bottle of JD, a few wraps of powdered mushrooms, several spliffs and a few wraps of speed. This was at a forest party in Aberdeenshire, complete with sound system and perhaps 200 folk, all off their faces. At about 2am, some bright spark suggested skinny dipping in the local loch. Grand!

A goodly number of us schlepped into the pitch black forest in the right general direction and immediately became hopelessly lost. I announced that I would climb a tree to find the loch and picked the highest conifer available. The inevitable happened and I fell about 80 feet, suffering fairly severe injuries, but still able to walk.

For years afterwards, random people would come up to me on the street, slap my back and say things like, “Awright – it’s the f******* iron man!”.

Getting leathered on carlsberg export & vodka at a car show, the gang of us went to the fair ground, I passed out in the middle of the dodgem track while in a car & promptly fell out, survived that to get dragged onto some big whirly up & down ride thing where I passed out again and smashed my nose up, get dragged / carried back to my tent where I promptly wake up and pee all over my mate.

Next show later that summer, leathered again, go to a local pub, mate gets accused of chatting up a local wench, wenches husband gives out a bit, mate come back with “why would I be doing that she’s a **** munger mate” one bunch of (what turned out to be local travellers) chasing after us through the local lanes on foot, we survive that, get back to the camping ground, let a load of tents down, steal a gazebo, push a side screen into a lake and steal half a boundary rope. Ended up getting banned from those ones!!