Tell me about catapults

Want to rid the garden of pests (tree rats, pigeons etc). Don’t want to kill or maim anything though, just do enough to startle them.

I was thinking about a black widow for accuracy but is it likely to seriously hurt anything?

Only if you use 3/4″ ball bearings………..apparently 8)

You stand in the tree, I’ll practice against you – lets find out.

yes depending on what you use as ammunition.

No, if course not, how would projecting a solid pellet at very high speeds into a living creature possibly harm it? How about something noisier, like a shotgun? Or maybe some sort of tactical nuclear weapon?

is it likely to seriously hurt anything?

Yes.

Either embrace teh fluffeh or embrace your inner Nuge and kill it and grill it!

(Squirrel and pigeon are both mighty tasty)

Have you, even for one split second in your selfish and homicidal drive to want to kill things, considered the implications of a stray BB or stone flying off beyond the boundaries of your garden by accident?

This is a child’s face:

Do I need to spell it out to you? Do I? Hmm??

@valleydaddy – so is there a specific ammo I can use? Something like rubber bullets for catapults?

You will kill things with a catapult in the unlikely event you actually hit anything. Have you considered a water pistol?

Elfin – if it went past the tree they all live in, it would end up in a private field full of sheep.

I’d suggest getting a guard fox, but according to most people they only come out at night.

A decent Super Soaker/BFO Water pistol/Gun thing will do the job nicely and won’t put any windows through or P off the neighbours if it goes a bit stray.

A spring lamb recklessly shot by a catapult, just imagine…………

@valleydaddy – so is there a specific ammo I can use? Something like rubber bullets for catapults?

Ace, because rubber bullets never hurt anyone, right. Apart from the odd blinding incident. Go and google images for ‘rubber bullets’.

duntstick, I can work with that;

Blowpipe with rubber tipped darts?

I’m imagining.

EDIT: Must Google faster, even if mine does look tastier. 😉

leos dried peas are the best 😀

Cat?

And what if there are children in the field, petting the lambs? Hmm? Have you considered that?

No you haven’t, because you’re too intent on killing things to satisfy some sort of primal lust, than to consider the danger to children’s faces. So selfish. 🙁

If you must, then get a pigeon and rip it’s head off with yer teeth then hold the body aloft and let the blood drip over your naked body.

Might be an idea not to let yer neighbours see you doing this. Can be awkward later down the local Gestapo office…

even if mine does look tastier poncier and comes with a “jus”

FTFY

😉

How COULD you 🙄

Not sure what you think you’ll achieve by startling them anyway, they’ll come back if there’s food to be had.

Get an air rifle and do the job properly, and eat the proceeds. Better than going to a supermarket for some cling film wrapped protein.

Badlywired you seem intent on assuming I want to hurt things but I don’t ( see the op). And there would be zero chance of blinding anyone but myself given the garden backs on to a private field.

A water pistol MAY work but the pigeons especially sit high in the tree and I an not sure it would have the range.

That’s a fluff overload right there, RichPenny!

Aye, could stick in throat 😉

I wouldn’t know about poncey, Captain. 😉

pea shooter and dried peas, brilliant fun

Look – field! Sheep! No children!

Badlywired you seem intent on assuming I want to hurt things but I don’t ( see the op). And there would be zero chance of blinding anyone but myself given the garden backs on to a private field.

No, I’m just a little incredulous that you have to ask on a forum whether something designed as a hunting weapon is likely to hurt anything… what were you thinking?

And then you come up with rubber bullets as an example of harmless ammunition…

I’m surprised that you haven’t asked whether using a high-powered water pistol is likely to make anything wet… 😉 Mind you, you’d probably opt for a water cannon instead…

Flame thrower? Is it likely to damage foliage?

Fire some lit bangers into the tree?

Burn the **** tree down

What was I thinking? See the original post and work it out FFS! If there is no option available to use a catapult without hurting them then I won’t get one. Which was, err, the point of the question in the original post I made. Originally.

Vegetables as projectiles, less harmful to the environment

What was I thinking? See the original post and work it out FFS! If there is no option available to use a catapult without hurting them then I won’t get one. Which was, err, the point of the question in the original post I made. Originally.

Marshmallows. If you heat them first, they’re like Napalm, but non-fatal. Clogs up their fur and means other animals will lick them compulsively, but will wash out with heavy rain or if you put the animal in a washing machine. Harmless to lambs and small children as well.

if you put the animal in a washing machine. Harmless to lambs and small children as well.

Are you suggesting that putting small children in a washing machine is safe?

Are you suggesting that putting small children in a washing machine is safe?

Only if its set to delicate’s.

Delicate’s what?

Delicate’s delicates?

Pigeons and squirrels are vermin, get a proper gun and shot them if its safe to do so.