Stuff that makes you disproportionately cross

Just needed to revisit this to wrinkle my nose up and ask why it exists. Vodka tastes of precisely nothing!

Because people will buy it?

I dunno, I don’t remember whether it was any good or not, it was pushing 20 years ago and I didn’t take notes.

tomato & vodka pasta sauce

Just needs a dash of Tabasco, and what you’ve got there is a bloody mary?

The go compare advert. New singer guy trying to look like the old one, why not make him completely different.

But more annoyingly he vacuums while a cat watches him……..from a robo vacuum.

HGV drivers tailgating in roadworks when I’m already doing 55 mph in the inside lane. You want to overtake? Go for it. But sitting behind me while flashing your lights and deliberately driving as close as possible just enrages me beyond belief.

Why is it that “professional” drivers are often the worst on the road?

Today it’s this guy

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cq5d4lx5qxdo

Camp there whenever you like but maybe just send the pics to a few close mates and not somehow try to prove you’ve completed Snowdonia, like the rescue guys aren’t stretched enough.

Roadworks on major roads. Or, rather the abject bellendery displayed by drivers in said areas.

A1/M. Major roadworks. 2 lanes. Signs on both sides saying ‘use both lanes’ then, lo and behold, at the merge point, signs saying ‘merge in turn’.

Its not complicated. It’s not difficult. So, to the wankstain in the white car, deciding he’s the road policing police, straddling both lanes to stop the ‘overtakers’ as they’re the ‘others’ over-taking… Eff you. Nob. Is it any wonder there’s 5 mile tailbacks you tosser?

Reading ‘one-fourth’ in a NY Times article.

Is it any wonder there’s 5 mile tailbacks you tosser?

I don’t think this is disproportionate, it’s asshattery of the highest order.  Merge like a zip and traffic works, well, like a zip.  Some tit gets it into their head that everyone else is queue-jumping despite it being two parallel lines to the same place and congratulations, you’ve just doubled the length of the queue causing who knows what knock-on problems behind you.

Reading ‘one-fourth’ in a NY Times article.

That’s because the NY Times is a daily, not a quarterly.

Traffic light creepers. The ones who stop at the red light queue long enough for me to pull up behind them and for my stop/start to kill the engine. Then they decide they’d like to be a foot closer to the car in front so they move forward, my car spots them moving off so starts the engine again. Then they decide another couple of inches of progress are necessary. And again.

Then when the lights change they’re suddenly in no hurry to go anywhere so leave a massive gap to the car in front, enough for the road sensor to decide it’s time to switch back to red. And repeat…

people that don’t admit they are wrong/made a mistake/didn’t actually say what they said they said.

Now this is NOT because I want to say ‘told you so’ or judge them – far from it.

Its just that I have the type of personality that always thinks it was my fault – when I balls up I always admit it but when something goes wrong, doesn’t happen etc and I’m sure its not me and the other person assures me they didn’t make a mistake then I spend way too long trying to work out how I messed up.

If I then subsequently find out that actually they were lying and (in this particular case) didn’t tell me some important info then I am now disproportionately cross that I spent a week worrying about how I could have been so stupid as to forget an important conversation rather then him saying ‘sorry mate must have forgot to tell you’ and me saying ‘muppet – no worries it will just take a bit longer now’ and forgetting about the situation 5 minutes later.

Cyclists who think they must get to the green bicyclists bit when there’s a line of traffic stopped at the lights. And do so by filtering up the middle.

What inevitable happens is just as they reach the front of the leading cars the lights change and they wobble about and hold up the entire two lanes.

Motorists moaning about cyclists using bike infrastructure as intended on a bike forum.

See also Motorists sitting in their two tonnes of high embedded CO2 materials taking up huge amount of space and being the major congestion problem moaning about the space dedicated to cyclists.

The regular as clockwork hype about “supermoons”, and the term itself.  As for the blue variety, get in the sea – preferably at the very high tides we get at perigee.

Few weeks ago I saw a passenger in a Yaris do a supermoon.

It did not make me disproportionately cross :)

People who send a full company emails highlighting an ‘issue’ that is a thinly veiled dig at one person. “In the future can we ALL make sure we include XYZ when we’re doing this?”

Motorists moaning about cyclists using bike infrastructure as intended on a bike forum

I had no idea motorists also moaned about that.

I had no idea motorists also moaned about that.

Some do it without even realising.

Canyon Bikes. I was ever-so-tempted by a Neuron CF8, as it was reduced…

Then they put the price back up and my longing abated.

It’s bloody reduced again, only this time, by a further £100! Damn you Canyon…damn you.

Yeah – but was it blue?

Yeah – but was it blue?

Red.

Estate agent I’m currently dealing with… the ‘boss’ is really nice, but his ‘senior sales negociator’ is an absolute nightmare, one of those who loves the sound of thier own voice…I’ve literally had to tell her “shut up, let me talk, I can’t get a bloody word in edgeways!” on more than one occasion.

The job is almost complete so I’m just not picking the phone up to them any more, email only, for my sanity!

Front seat passengers that put their feet up on the dashboard. Often barefoot.

Get your rank cheesy feet off the dash and windscreen, before, god forbid you have a crash and put your knee caps through your eye sockets as the airbag goes off.

People who park up in a village to shit in the woods. Saw this guy park up in a quiet side street the other day. Gets out the car his mate hands him a roll of toilet paper. He walks into the woods. Comes back out five minutes later with his phone in his hand no toilet roll. Jumps in the car and drives off. There are public toilets in the village centre and plenty of cafes about with toilets. Is it a thing to shit in the woods when you could just as easily go to a nearby public toilet? Maybe a hash tag thing to brag about.

Front seat passengers that put their feet up on the dashboard. Often barefoot.

Get your rank cheesy feet off the dash and windscreen, before, god forbid you have a crash and put your knee caps through your eye sockets as the airbag goes off.

Oh man, I would lose the plot if someone did that in my car, huge safety aspects aside, it shows a complete lack of respect. I would stop the car and kick them out.

People who are orecious about tbeur cars  ?

Front seat passengers that put their feet up on the dashboard. Often barefoot.

In my defence, it was a hot day and I’d been cooped up in the car for hours. Seat was hot so change of position required. Feet not cheesy because I wash then and they weren’t sweating away inside foot coffins :-)

To be honest feet on the dash is the least of the issues in our car lolol.

orecious about tbeur cars

Easy for you to say…..

Lolz

Shoe sizes aaaaaaahhhhhh

People who use the bandsaw and just leave their offcuts all over it.

Every. Single. Time.

Annoying as anything, but also very dangerous in a busy workshop where your instinct is to sweep offcuts away when saws can still be running unnoticed in the general noise.

Angry face emoji

People that chip their car park/ drive at their house then keep dragging stones out into the road every time they drive off but never sweep up all their s–t

Fishermen who loose creels or cut their ropes only for them to be washed ashore never seem to clean up their act

People who are orecious about tbeur cars?

Winds me up immensely as I’d have to clean the footprints of it. I’ve kicked a passenger out before now for that, our vehicles used to get inspected BITD.

Not bothered about their stupidity related potential injury.

We have a shower curtain. It is dripping wet after you have a shower. I leave it inside the bath to drip dry, as any normal person would.

I frequently find that MrsMC has pulled it outside the bath so it can drip dry onto the floor.

WHY!?

Because you’re foolish enough to have a shower curtain.  Hateful things, clammily slopping against your leg as soon as you start the shower because that’s how air pressure works.  She’s hoping that you’ll get sufficiently pissed off to replace it with a screen door, this isn’t the 1970s.

(She’s not, she thinks it looks better hanging straight, but y’know.)

Ryan Reynolds wearing a reputable watch upside down on his wrist in the Fall Guy.  I mean seriously, how could he or anyone else not notice.

I am outraged.

Mrs sargey going for a shower and using the loo before her shower, Nothing wrong with that but before the cistern has filled up she turns the boiler fed shower on before it’s filled up.

Que boiler straining to send water to the shower.

Most folk now have semi retired their big oven for making cakes, scones and Xmas and bought an air fryer so why don’t they give times for optimum cooking frozen stuff instead of guessing

Council road signs still workmen either using a shovel or struggling with an umbrella rather than sitting parked up having their extended piece as it’s started to rain and show a side elevation of a Morris 1100 , I had a b reg one from ’64

60 years ago

The disgusting lunatic of a man who, in a busy campsite toilet block in Dorset, showers next door,  is standing at the line of basins, pants down, washing his bollocks etc, arse hanging out, waddling around getting things from his bag, mid-bollock washing.

Seriously, WTAF is wrong with some people?!

Won’t be brushing my teeth in there…

The disgusting lunatic of a man who, in a busy campsite toilet block in Dorset, showers next door,  is standing at the line of basins, pants down, washing his bollocks etc, arse hanging out,

Sorry, I didn’t have a token for the shower……

And, I’ve got a bit of a fungal infection ‘down there’ which chafes and flakes like a b*****d so needs must.