Large companies crap ideas..

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  • Large companies crap ideas..
  • bencooper
    Member

    Possibly apocryphal story, when that policy was first introduced in the UK:

    A hapless Starbucks employee asked a customer his name, and a voice from further back in the queue shouted “Don’t tell him, Pike!”

    Jamie
    Member

    Might have been chatting you up?

    ohnohesback
    Member

    Barclays: If you make another automated junk call to me (I’m not one of your customers) the frayed threads restraining my rage will snap and I will do something that you will regret, with pain, for the rest of your miserable life.

    Anger management? I’ve got plenty of anger to spare! I don’t need to ration it!

    Gunz
    Member

    Any company whose advert revolves around some wispy ballad, a bloke with a ukulele and washed out Summer sunshine happiness.
    Oh, and any car advert that promotes their product as some sort of lifestyle choice instead of telling me what the thing actually does (that is just about all of them though).

    ernie_lynch
    Member

    Don’t knock them for trying to add a personal touch and increase their appeal, they desperately need to do something – they haven’t made a profit in the UK for 3 years !

    Premier Icon andytherocketeer
    Subscriber

    Yep, none of their business. If it’s something so they can do multiple orders in parallel, then they need better staff.

    On a name theme… Coke and stupid names on bottles. If I see that, I pick another drink. I don’t want coke with someone else’s name written on it that’s been rummaged about in the fridge.

    willard
    Member

    My local Starbucks (for when I can’t get a nice coffee at my usual place) has pretty much stopped asking for my name. Mind you, it may have been because I kept giving them my surname and they then had to call me “Mr. …” rather than be fake chummy and call out my first name.

    I’m currently very annoyed with drinks companies telling me that I could enhance my summer if I a) drank their piss-weak rubbish lager/cider from Australia/Belgium* but that I should also b) drink it responsibly.

    Drinking crap beer/cider, hell, drinking alcohol full stop, will not enhance my summer. It will make me fat, feel hungover and ruin my fitness.

    * All made in west London by the A4. Another lie.

    Premier Icon molgrips
    Subscriber

    Starbucks, asking my name when I order coffee.

    Generally that’s so that everyone knows which drink is theirs, and it’s also quite useful if you are having to wait and you get chatting because you pick your name out of the background noise quite easily.

    Most of them don’t bother asking me if it’s quiet.

    Premier Icon ratherbeintobago
    Subscriber

    rather than be fake chummy and call out my first name.

    That really boils my piss. Call centre operatives saying “Is it OK if I call you Andrew?” No, it’s not. You can call me Dr RBIT.

    On a par with cold callers ringing up and asking to speak to Mr (Mrs RBIT’s surname). No, you can’t. My father in law doesn’t live here.

    zokes
    Member

    piss-weak rubbish lager/cider from Australia/

    Well, we certainly don’t want it here!

    zokes
    Member

    No, it’s not. You can call me Dr RBIT.

    Yeah, but then they’d just call you Mr Rabbit, which probably wouldn’t help much

    Premier Icon molgrips
    Subscriber

    A lot of people here living with dangerously volatile wee, I think 🙂

    TooTall
    Member

    Are these First World Problems or Middle Class Angst? I find it so hard to tell them apart these days.

    Premier Icon dannybgoode
    Subscriber

    LloydsTSB – if they suspect fraudulent activity on your account they ring you with an automated voice asking you to confirm certain aspects of your account.

    Haven’t we been told time and time again never to confirm any personal details unless you know for sure who is calling and you can’t verify an automated system…

    bencooper
    Member

    RBS do that too – random phone calls from an Indian call centre, with the script “Hello, I’m calling about charges on your business Mastercard – for security could you please give me your business name and address, your personal address, your date of birth, and your mother’s maiden name?”

    “No” seems to surprise them. I always hang up and call them back.

    nealglover
    Member

    Are these First World Problems or Middle Class Angst? I find it so hard to tell them apart these days.

    Not sure it either. It’s just people on the Internet doing bad Charlie Brooker impressions 😉

    2hottie
    Member

    Children in bog roll adverts…. I cannot see the point. Lets be honest all we really care about is its ability to wipe without breaking and in as few sheets as possible. I’m not fussed if kiddies think it’s all lovely and soft.

    wrecker
    Member

    Generally that’s so that everyone knows which drink is theirs, and it’s also quite useful if you are having to wait and you get chatting because you pick your name out of the background noise quite easily.

    They don’t do it if you’re “having in”. Don’t want to felt tip on the porcelain probably, which is why it falls within “gimmick” to me.

    IanW
    Member

    Not as in sharp practice although that too but their crap attempts to endear themselves to me.

    example: Starbucks, asking my name when I order coffee.

    No you cant have my name just **** off.

    PJM1974
    Member

    I like telling the Starbucks people that my name is Spartacus.

    wrecker
    Member

    I tried telling them my name was Batman. The polite waitress smiled and asked nothing. My dim-witted friend got her attention and told her my name wasn’t really Batman. She laughed 😀

    scuzz
    Member

    They don’t do it if you’re “having in”. Don’t want to felt tip on the porcelain probably, which is why it falls within “gimmick” to me.

    The barista boys always ask my name and get all wide eyed when I reply ‘Cosmo’…

    compositepro
    Member

    i thought this was a hoover thread

    nealglover
    Member

    They don’t do it if you’re “having in”. Don’t want to felt tip on the porcelain probably, which is why it falls within “gimmick” to me.

    They do in the one I use, and they put it on a little sticker/post it type thing and stick it to the cup.

    It all seems perfectly sensible to me.

    Maybe I need to pretend to be angry for effect more often 😉

    edlong
    Member

    Hoover? Is that a reference to their “buy a £80 vacuum and get £300 of flights free” wheeze a few years ago?

    Premier Icon andytherocketeer
    Subscriber

    DOn’t see why there’s any need to. You order a coffee, the guy makes it, then charges you for it. And if there are several of you in one group ordering together, well thousands and thousands of restaurants and coffee shops and customers have been more than capable of handling multiple item orders and getting the right items to the right customer, for decades.

    Wouldn’t use the term “Barista” in Starbucks or Costa, etc.

    lilchris
    Member

    bencooper – Member
    random phone calls from an Indian call centre…..

    ….I always hang up and call them back.WOT?
    Why?

    compositepro
    Member

    Hoover? Is that a reference to their “buy a £80 vacuum and get £300 of flights free” wheeze a few years ago?

    aye

    Premier Icon molgrips
    Subscriber

    well thousands and thousands of restaurants and coffee shops and customers have been more than capable of ordering some items and getting those items to the right customer, for decades.

    Not 100% right.

    wrecker
    Member

    Maybe I need to pretend to be angry for effect more often

    Up your red meat intake 😉

    Premier Icon andytherocketeer
    Subscriber

    or maybe Starbuck staff are moer forgetful than the kids who work in McDonalds… and they can handle multiple orders in parallel, and drinks that look identical (eg diet/non-diet coke) ?
    And I’d hope any waiter/waitress and fastfood attendant can remember who they are currently serving

    samuri
    Member

    Children in bog roll adverts…. I cannot see the point. Lets be honest all we really care about is its ability to wipe without breaking and in as few sheets as possible. I’m not fussed if kiddies think it’s all lovely and soft.

    This. In fact if a company said ‘our bogroll isn’t soft but it’s hard as nails’ and showed a dock worker grimacing as he scrubbed his backside, I’d buy that one.

    Bad company decisions? I’d like to think that the Budweiser what’sup advertising campaign lost them many millions but the sad truth is that people are so stupid, I think it worked.

    dabble
    Member

    If I ever get desperate enough for a coffee that i’m willing to spend 3 and a half quid on a cup then the server asking for my name will be the thing i’m least pissed off about.

    nealglover
    Member

    You order a coffee, the guy makes it, then charges you for it.

    Or, how it actually happens.

    You order your drink, one guy charges you for it.
    Passes the order to a couple of other guys, one of which will make it.
    Or they may make different bits of it each possibly.
    In the time it’s taken him to make it, the first guy has taken loads more order for similar or totally different drinks and passed them on too.
    The second (or third) guy has a drink ready, and a hoard of people waiting around for drinks, a few of them have ordered the same thing and nobody can remember who’s next in line.
    The guy who made them doesn’t know either because he’s never seen any of you before.
    So nobody knows who’s drink it is until the pushy tw@ at the back grabs it and wanders off.

    Here’s an idea, they could put your name on it maybe, safe any confusion ?

    ernie_lynch
    Member

    Here’s an idea, they could put your name on it maybe, safe any confusion ?

    It’s the only reason I go to Starbucks.

    If I go anywhere else I can never find my coffee.

    scuzz
    Member

    andytherocketeer, I hope you pay in cash – they can easily read your name from your card y’know, or maybe get you to sign a bit of paper if the chip and pin machine is down… In those cases it’s very much their business to know your name.

    Premier Icon andytherocketeer
    Subscriber

    Or go to a proper coffee bar.

    Premier Icon Sandwich
    Subscriber

    they haven’t made a profit in the UK for 3 years

    According to the tax man, in their company filings in USA they have declared a rather healthy profit for UK territory.

    GRRRRRR

    And breathe.

    deadlydarcy
    Member

    Breweries importing beers brewed abroad (usually lager) and once finding they’re a success, forget that the reason they were ever a hit might have been down to taste rather than marketing and then brew them to an “authentic” recipe in the UK.

    I bought a four pack of Brahma recently for a barbecue in the sun – thought “Hmm, this doesn’t taste as nice as I was expecting” only to find the familiar “Brewed in the UK to an authentic Brazilian recipe” on the label. Bah! 😐

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