Kids – How many and are you happy with the choice?

as many as you can look after (responsibly)

0, most definitely happy with my life choice.

Did population increase enter into the decision making process or was it a not even a consideration?

Sort of, and we do try to minimise our “impact” as much as we can. However, Western populations are not really increasing are they? Kind of pale into insignificance against India, China etc.

3 – happy
9 year old boy, 4 year old girl and 2 year old boy
the big one has always been good as gold
middle one is good too but is prone to occasional tantrums and sulks…well she is a girl
little one is a naughty mischievous little git and will pick on the other 2 whenever he feels like it

Never particularly fussed about kids of my own.
One ex wanted to move to Australia then have kids.
Aus was the deal breaker, not the kids!

Have 3 wonderful nieces in their 20’s who I’ve known all their lives and
have two adult step-daughters, now in their early 30’s.

Amazingly I now have shares in a grand daughter.
🙂

Basically, most of the good bits, without the hassle.

3, my eldest is 30 in November and back living with us, not only that, but on his days off his 4 year old son comes to stay too. I’d like my house back, (but the wife may see it differently). 😉

1. Oops.
2. Whoops.
3. Whatever, in for a penny in for a pound.

Yes – until another morning when mrs_oab and I are outnumbered.

Ever since I could legally be a father, since late 1989, I’ve never had a longing for kids of my own.

Mainly due to…
Cost
Stress
A genetic history of mental health issues in the family
I feel the Uk is too overpopulated already

Still not too late to change my mind, but happy with my choice.

One daughter, one unknown on the way. Daughter is 2.5 and will be 2.75 when the new one makes an appearance.

I took some persuading by Mrs Nerd to have the first. We ummed and aahed about having a 2nd one and then I was (being) sent to Mexico so the fear of Zika spurred us on and Mrs Nerd was pregnant before I boarded the flight.

Two seems about right – they will have a sibling in later life and someone has to pay for our pensions.
Just wish the 2.5 year old would sleep in her own bed. 🙂

2 and Yes.

Boy who’s 11 next month and Girl who was 2 in June.

If I’m honest, I didn’t seek out to have either of them – I met my Wife 6 years ago and she already had a little lad. His biological father has zero interest and in short, signed over all visitation rights etc in exchange for waiving his maintenance payments – £10 a week. Arsehole, but it made life easier for us – I’m Dad, he understands the mechanics of why and how etc, but I’m Dad, which is cool.

No2 was a ‘mistake’ although I’m not certain it was a mistake for all parties – it was terrifying for me, second kid, but first baby – I’m never done anything as hard in my life as the first 5 months with her, how I survived I don’t know.

They’re bloody hard work, there is no end, just when you think you’ve got them happy and healthy and growing up as as they should, they’ll go and thrown everything on it’s head, but it’s wonderful, absolutely wonderful – sometimes when things are hard and I just haven’t got a second to myself I wish I was back being single, carefree and doing whatever I wanted to do – but truth is back then I was unhappy more than I was happy, desperately unhappy a lot of the time, now I’m happy most of the time.

2, 17 and 3. yes. they are a bloody nightmare together ! total chaos! 😀

2 girls, 6 & 10, same birthday 4 years apart. I didn’t want kids whatsoever but they are absolutely the best things ever to have happened. So glad we didn’t have boys as I can’t stand them. I’m lucky in that I’ve spent far more time with them than most dads do with their kids and happily gave up my career to be the main carer and general housedad. I found that I am a pretty good dad and house husband, certainly better than I was as an employee, being hands on dad just came naturally. I just love hanging out with them and pretty much do with all of my spare time. Make the most of it as they grow up pretty fast and eventually they won’t want to but I wouldn’t have it any other way just now.

One, going to have one more try for a second (IVF), then leave it at that.

0, happy as a happy thing happed up on happypills

One daughter, and very happy with that.

3 girls, 16, 14 & 14 (BOGOF)

Very happy which is a good job ‘cos there’s not a lot I can do about it now.
I’m not a wendyball fan so not sure I could have done boys but girls come with their own bag of trouble.
Daffy, don’t have another because ‘they’ll play with each other’ as they may well not. That said I think that having just one child is a bit sad and I’m eternally grateful that I’m not an only child.

3. Twin boys (9) and daughter (11). Yes, very happy. One son nearly didn’t make it – so we are so thankful to have them.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s hard work sometimes and they have their moments, not perfect – but they are good kids with great caring natures. Never know what enthusiasm one boy will dive deeply into next, don’t know what his brother will say from minute to minute and my daughter is really interesting and thinks quite deeply.

Bit obvious but Iove them all so much…

0. (and 2 rescue kittens about 1.5 years old now who are mostly cool)

Had one (planned) on the way earlier in the year, but sadly it didn’t happen (got to 10-11 weeks). Mrs is ready to try again now.

Always wanted a boy, now not really bothered. (but would secretly like a boy).. Financially. Probably be OK.

On the age gap thing.. I dunno, my little sis is 5 years younger than me and we aren’t really bonded, we’re cool but she was away at school from 11-18 years old or so so not around much. (not a public school.. something else..)

I thought I wanted a boy, but have two girls and now the thought of having a boy feels weird.

Kids are great. Very challenging, but great.

0, yes

none and yes.

1 – 1 too many.

(Nah not really, but I do so enjoy telling her that)

We have 3, boy 18 and 2 girls 16 and 11.
As with MattOAB none of them really planned. Happy with 3 they are great and frustrating in equal measures almost daily!

None, Yes – both happy.

We have quite a few nephews who are close, aged 0.5, 1 & 4.

3 of the parents are seemingly completely ambivalent to them & the changes they have bought to life, which has just re-affirmed our decision not to bother.

2 here – girls aged 9 and 5.

11 years ago a Dr told my wife it was unlikely we’d be able to have kids due to issues with her ovaries.
18 months later daughter No1 came along.

we then lost a pregnancy at 12 weeks after my wife was in a car crash.

Daughter No2 then almost killed my wife (and herself) – ruptured uterus during delivery = 1/200 chance of them both surviving – but they did.
A gas test on a section of umbilical cord confirmed our daughter was 90 seconds from brain damage due to lack of oxygen.. so, so lucky.

My wife always wanted 3 kids, but the Surgeon standing in the corridor outside the operating Theatre, covered in my wifes blood and telling me not to have anymore kids sort of put me off.

Totally happy with how things turned out – the 9 year old is Tinkerbell in Human form, the younger one more like Tank Girl.

General question to those who had > 2 children (excluding children from previous relationship s). Did population increase enter into the decision making process or was it a not even a consideration?

not really

the problem with our country (the world) is that we have too many old people, living for far too long
we either need more people to emigrate in or more babies being born or we get all Logans Run

Not that I believe that we are overcrowded,
theres plenty of room, we just need to use things more wisely and share the wealth better, comrades

3
boy 6, girl 4 and girl 1.5
I was happy with two, we had the discussion and decided to get a dog instead of 3rd child. Now we have a dog and a 3rd child!
I don’t regret any of it though, they’re all amazing although sometimes you do feel a bit outnumbered!
Definitely no number 4 though, doctor made sure of that

2 girls 2.5 years apart. Tried for closer. They are now 7 and 5 and each others’ best mates.

Lots of reasons for sticking at two. Population control is one (if everyone has two kids population would fall) but others include being able to use normal cars, cost of holidays (need to travel to the us for that), practicality of travel, size of house and so on.

However seeing what lovely kids they are it strikes me that we could probably do with more decent thoughtful well brought-up people in the world so maybe more would have been better.

But there’s no chance we’re going back to crying babies and all that shit.

One boy and that’s fine – he’s two on the weekend and is generally a good ‘un but he keeps up busy! I wish I had just a wee bit of his energy.

He’s getting easier in some ways and I have no desire to reset to newborn stage. He won’t grow up alone because he’s very very close to one of his cousins who is only a few months older. He seems him a lot (although they do bicker an awful lot).

However seeing what lovely kids they are it strikes me that we could probably do with more decent thoughtful well brought-up people in the world so maybe more would have been better.

yup.. you gotta balance out the stats.. otherwise the scummers with 6 kids by 6 fathers will be the majority..

0 kids 6 bikes. Only thing I could wish for is more bikes.

3 boys – 7, 6 and 2. Every day is spent desperately trying to tire them out, shouting at no-one as they don’t listen, tidying/washing/cleaning/feeding (why can’t boys stop eating!), breaking up fights and so on. Any more than 1 kid and you stop being a parent and start being a referee!

Happy – mostly

This only 10,8 and 6. It’s great!

0 kids 6 bikes. Only thing I could wish for is more bikes.

Parkesie, are you me?

0, 100% happy with my decision.

1 aged 1 and a little bit.
No plans for a second he is awesome but don’t feel the need for a second at all he will be fine as an only child and it means we are not bankrupting ourselves and get to spend lots and lots of time with him

Yes i know i shouldn’t look at the financial side but it is actually valid as a concern

Yes i know i shouldn’t look at the financial side but it is actually valid as a concern

absolutely! my o/h works in education, so half terms etc won’t be much of a problem once of school age 🙂

Yes i know i shouldn’t look at the financial side but it is actually valid as a concern

Why the hell would you not look at the financial side? You’re taking on a long term commitment, you absolutely should look at if you can afford it before going down that route.

3, 2 girls 22, 18 and boy 13, wouldn`t change it for the world, only difference is 15 bikes in the garage and they are not all mine!!

One boy and that’s fine – he’s two on the weekend and is generally a good ‘un but he keeps up busy! I wish I had just a wee bit of his energy.

He’s getting easier in some ways and I have no desire to reset to newborn stage. He won’t grow up alone because he’s very very close to one of his cousins who is only a few months older. He seems him a lot (although they do bicker an awful lot).

you’ve not got to the terrible two’s stage yet!! 😆

Why the hell would you not look at the financial side? You’re taking on a long term commitment, you absolutely should look at if you can afford it before going down that route.

perfectly valid point. mrs gonzy got pregnant 3 months into our marriage. it wasnt planned but more a case of if it happens its a bonus
second one was planned…we decided that gonzy 1 needed a sibling and the time was right
we were happy with the 2 then gonzy 3 turned up out of nowhere….completely unplanned. mrs gonzy stopped taking the pill ofr a while due to some health issues and forgot to restart them
but we’ve never regretted it

as for having a fourth…she has mentioned it a few times because she got broody when her sister had her fourth…but i had to point out that financially it would be hard.
we’d need a bigger house, i’d just bought her a new car that i was still paying off and a 4th child would mean selling it at a loss and buying a people carrier, nursery care costs at some point would hit us hard…etc

i was glad she saw sense and agreed with me

We have two, 13 and 8. I didn’t want any at first and once we’d had one I didn’t want anymore. But I can’t imagine life without either of them now. They’re great kids but we have no desire for a third, life is exhausting enough. We have quite a few friends with toddlers and anytime we look after them we both say, great kids but don’t want to go back to that. One thing I’ve noted is that some of our kids friends that don’t have siblings come across as quite needy and high maintenance, not saying this is true of all only child’s but it wouldn’t be hard to spoil an only child.

2, one aged 8 and one aged 6. That’ll do nicely thanks.

Both are awesome and frustrating in their own ways.