I nearly did a dump in the passenger seat…

So we’re in this car I’m thinking about buying and the guy who’s selling it drives it down this country lane at a reasonable enough speed, 40 mph maybe, the suns out and its a lovely day and all is right in the world. But as we turn onto this main road all hell brakes loose. Before I can get a grip on whats going on he turns to me as we arrive at a fairly tight 30 degree bend and says “we’re doing a 100mph now and theres no need to lift…see?” As you can imagine I didn’t share is unwavering conviction on this point but somehow and I really don’t know how ‘cos my eyes were shut very tight, we got round the bend and thankfully the velocity we were travelling at slowed ( I think this happened because he could hear me whimpering).
This all took place in about 30 seconds but I’ll never forget them.
This kind of thing ever happened to anyone else on a test drive?

So, did you buy the car ❓

Not a test drive but a friend of mine’s driver gave me a lift to Berlin airport in his souped up Audi A6. We were driving for the most part at 250ks an hour with all the other cars looking like they were standing still and the lorries going backwards! I tried not to show my absolute terror but I am sure he noticed the wet patch on his leather seat. 😳

Err, yes I have. I think I might have post traumatic stress and thats wot made me buy it.

Remember going for s test drive in an Evo 8 and was being told to go faster and faster around this roundabout in an effort to demonstrate the (pretty amazing) active diffs.

Still bought an Impreza, though.

Rachel

Out of interest what car is it?

Selling my old Pulsar to some wide-eyed kid who’d travelled 2hours to view it – one sweet full-on launch up to the 60 speed limit & he was sold on it, all over in <7seconds I reckon! I very rarely drove it that aggressively myself, was too scared something would break!

Pulsar was and is a great car…

I did the opposite – I had a test drive in a mini and scared the garage chap in the passenger seat by sloting it into a motorbike sized space on a roundabout 😳

Yeah you can pass me at X mph, but if I catch you, I’m going to actually eat your face.

So enjoy your skin while you can, until I eat it.

And I will make you watch me eating your face; mind, you won’t have any eyelids left at this stage.

Where’syer lolcat for this one phil? 😉

?

good few years back I hd just finished preping mates car for a rally at the weekend and he decided to take it for a test run. I reminded him a few times that the roads were pretty icy as he set the car up sideways for most corners(country lane, late at night) Needless to say the inevitable happened and we ended up bouncing of a dyke and rolling down the road a bit before the car landed on it`s wheels. We got back to the garage and started straightening it out ready again for the weekend
Another mate ended up buying an ex Graham Elsmore GP1 escort after inverting it on a test run. Nice car actually
I did manage to frighten off a few navigators when I was road rallying 😈

we ended up bouncing of a dyke

What was her name?

Sorry if that’s horribly offensive to anyone 😳

Liftman, its an old boxster 😳

and to be fair i am going to re train as a hairdresser 😉

I did the opposite – I had a test drive in a mini and scared the garage chap in the passenger seat by sloting it into a motorbike sized space on a roundabout

Yep me too.

The wife wanted a sports car so she tested a Porsche Caymen, came back with a smile. Salesman suggested that I also have a go. A couple of miles up the road and he’s clenching in the seat and asks what do I normally drive – a motorbike… We came back with him shaking – I enjoyed the car though.

Test drove an Elise a few years ago around Birmingham…..That was fun, the salesman screamed a couple of times 8)

Also have a mate who’s a motoring journo so have been the passenger in a few rapid cars

Back in the day I had the collosal misfortune to work with someone who had a Carlos Fandango Golf GTi. One day I had to go out on site with him, in the Golf.

As soon as we started off I got the impression he was trying way too hard and as we peeled off yet another roundabout onto a fairly empty A-road I remember him uttering the immortal phrase ‘watch this’.

So we went around a few corners pretty fast then came to one which was a decreasing radius.

And yes he rolled it.

Was directing a ‘new driver’ to someone’s house (from the passenger seat) and as we approached a roundabout said “oh you need to turn right here” thinking it was obvious I meant “take the third exit”, but no, driver actually did turn right into the oncoming traffic – touched a bit of cloth there for sure….

Know a chap back in NZ who raced rally cars as a hobby (both driving and navigating). He won a prize in some competition which was a trip round a stage with Tommi Mäkinen at the wheel. Mäkinen was taking it easy, one hand on the wheel, pointing out landmarks, braking points and the like… this chap said it was all he could do not weep and beg for him to slow down to spare their lives 😀

A mate of mine was a squadee and was sent on an army course to pass your test in 3 days. He’d never been behind the wheel before. I don’t think they ever failed anyone. Certainly not on the strength of his driving. He was absolutely awful. Truly life-threatening as it turned out.

He did what any new driver would do and bought a tuned Cavalier SRi. And yes… I was in the passenger seat when it met its inevitable demise. Smashed to bits in a bus shelter after being t boned by another car he pulled out on in a screeching cloud of tyresmoke. It lasted less than a week. I was amazed it made it that far actually

His next car… a Cosworth Escort. I point blank refused to get in that one

Ahhh Car stories…

I bought an M3 convertable a couple of years back, it was Ghey Blue if you must know. So, my mates bought a BoxterS, had it a couple of weeks, and he takes me to collect my M3, nice Lad. I arrive at the garage and the BMW salesman (Martin) says “I see your mates gone for the Ghey version” I bust out laughing £42k’s worth of “Ghey version” mate gets out of his car and smacks Martin on the nose..

I stood in astonishment as my mate drove off…

I was once bought a hill climb day (just after I had bought myself a Puma and was fancying myself as a bit of an F1 star).

My father-in-law raced at the track and knew the instructor so asked him to give me a drive around in his car. It was just a standard BMW 320 but, on getting in, he said ‘people find that putting their right arm across their chest and holding on to the door grab handle works’ then proceeded to launch the car through a series of corners so quickly I genuinely had no idea how on earth he was keeping it on the track. All the time he was chatting, pointing out lines, apexes etc.

When i was in college a mate went for a test drive in a car, stopped on a hill and pulled the handbrake on and it came away from the floor, luckily the car behind stopped us rolling backwards down Rodborough hill in Stroud, strangely the owner of the car who was sitting in the front seat ran off, leaving us to sort it.

LOL – sounds like the time I was driving my very old and very broken old Escort. Pulled up at some traffic lights and they turned to green. I put the car into 1st and the gear stick just fell off in my hands. All the cars behind sounding horns and me waving the gear stick out of the window saying ‘I can’t make car go!’

I repaired it (by jamming a matchstick in the bushing to ‘tighten’ it) and t was stolen about a month later. The plod found it about 500 yards down the road, engine still running, gear stick on the back seat 🙂

And this is why I only go for test drives with people I know, I hate not being the one doing the scaring!

a friend was killed while out on his bike by somebody taking a car for a test drive at speed.

and to be fair i am going to re train as a hairdresser

this is where i come in… at no point have i owned anything quite so campboxsterish that classes it as a hairdressers car. i had a C Class Merc (W202) before a motorbike! why is it hairdressers get insulted here? 😀

(nice car by the way)

EDIT: and i’m sure hairdressers cars are the likes of MG’s etc. cars that look fast but go poo.

Test drove an Elise a few years ago around Birmingham…..That was fun, the salesman screamed a couple of times

I wouldn’t have bought from them. The mechanics gave me a ‘test spin’ in the Exige whilst my Elise was in for service. I have never been so scared.

I make it a rule that they should know the car better than I, they passed with flying colours and a little bit of vomit.

Mate of mine used to have a sticker on the inside of the passenger sun visor, “passengers are requested to refrain from screaming.” The car (and sticker) are long gone, but to this day whenever he’s driving a little, ah, vigorously, it’s still customary for his mates to pull down the sun visor and ‘check’ the non-existent warning.

Test drove an Elise a few years ago around Birmingham…..That was fun, the salesman screamed a couple of times

I had this with an Audi salesman in a Audi A2 going into a roundabout way too fast. He swore and screamed then apologises when we pulled back up.

He thought I drove into the roundabout at that speed on purpose but to be honest I hadn’t a clue what connection the steering wheel and tyres had with the road. (it was that woolly feeling) 😆

I was test driving a Civic Type R and went for an overtake that I was pretty sure my Leon Cupra would have easily made, not sure if I was in the wrong gear but never felt it going, braked and dropped back into where I was before pulling out. Sales man had a wee go at me saying ‘It’s not that bloody quick’ to which I said ‘I won’t bother taking it then!’.

Do feel sorry for them, they must get some terrible drivers testing the cars and some guys just out to see how quick they can go.

Flip side to that, my mate test drove a 2.2 Vectra, salesman told him to floor it, told him to keep going up to 75ish in a 30 limit (think it was my mate who decided it was too quick not the salesman). My mate is usually a very sensible driver but did what he was told. Did work though, he thought it was great and bought it.

He thought I drove into the roundabout at that speed on purpose but to be honest I hadn’t a clue what connection the steering wheel and tyres had with the road. (it was that woolly feeling)

Wooly feeling? And it was an Audi, you say? Shurely shome mishtake! 😉

Not long after I met my wife and she was driving us back to my place. She didn’t know the roads so I was directing her. We were approaching a bend where the road turned to the left but there was an entrance on the right which we didn’t want to take. I told her to follow the car in front which was going in the direction we wanted to.

Then the car in front veered off the road and crashed into a wall.

And my missus continued to follow it 😳

75 in a 30? Shouldn’t be driving at all if they’re that irresponsible…

stevemtb i testdrove both a type s and r and thought both shouted alot but with little comparative return