I’m 45 years old. I’m happily married. I have a dull desk job. I’m probably in slightly better shape than most 45 year olds (especially those I see around me doing their dull desk jobs), but George Clooney I ain’t.

I’ve come to realise that, whenever I see an attractive lady from the age of, I dunno, early twenties upwards, I stand up straighter, pull my shoulders back a bit and suck in my gut. I didn’t realise I was doing it but then I noticed I was, and now I realise I do it every time.

I’m pathetic.

I suspect we are all to some degree there with you, realising our youth has slipped away from us and we are not sure what we have really achieved.

I say this typing from my desk and being 41, I’m probably not in anything more than average shape, although a better shape than this time last year.

I didn’t realise I was doing it but then I noticed I was, and now I realise I do it every time.

Don’t fret over it. She won’t have noticed you doing it, or indeed noticed you at all. 🙂

I guess we all take pride in our appearance, no matter how far from the ideal ‘clooney’ we are!

I can add balding to my list of faults.

I think it was Bob Mortimer who recounted the story of an attractive young lady who smiled at him on the tube, made eye contact…..and then offered him her seat…😀

I’d say don’t sweat it…it happens to everyone you know!

Call that pathetic?

Hold my beer…..

I’m 47 years old. I’m happily married. I have an extremely dull desk job. I’m probably in worse shape than most 47 year olds (including those I see around me doing their dull desk jobs), but George Formby I ain’t.

I’ve come to realise that, whenever I see an attractive lady from the age of, I dunno, early twenties upwards, I immediately assume that she views me as some sort of deviant sexual predator even though I’d much rather just have a nice bowl of soup these days. I get all self conscious and modify my behaviour to try not to come across as a creepy pervert, even though I’m really not.  It doesn’t help. I didn’t realise I was doing it but then I noticed I was, and now I realise I do it every time.

I’m more pathetic.

I’ve come to realise that, whenever I see an attractive lady from the age of, I dunno, early twenties upwards, I stand up straighter, pull my shoulders back a bit and suck in my gut. I didn’t realise I was doing it but then I noticed I was, and now I realise I do it every time.

I wouldn’t bother, she won’t have seen you.

Remember The Sixth Sense? The world is just like that, except it’s not dead and living, it’s over 35’s and under 35’s. We’re invisible to them, they just hear vague whispers telling them what to do, which they promptly ignore.

but George Formby I ain’t.

Except when you’re cleaning windows, I’ve heard.

Except when you’re cleaning windows, I’ve heard.

If you could see what I can see…

I’m with PP on this one.

Also noticed at some point in the past 5 years or so (I am 52) that all checkout girls etc get thanked with some form of endearment…. thanks darling, thank you lovely, etc, etc. You know, the same way your dad did, which used to to embarrass you as a kid.

I’m divorced and live by myself with two cats

Not at all (IMHO!).

all checkout girls etc get thanked with some form of endearment…. thanks darling, thank you lovely, etc, etc.

You see, you’ve got show you’re not scared of the new fangled technology and use the self-checkout tills – unless you use the normal checkouts because you’ve not got anyone else to talk to!

This thread is far too light-hearted to reflect how pathetic I am.

Start a new one to include constant dark thoughts (when I can be arsed, that is), and I’ll be all in!

Im 33, i think i started behaving like this at 21!

As with so many things in life, Mark Radcliffe and Stuart Maconi summed it up perfectly. To summarise:

As a man over the age of 40 you are effectively invisable. Nobody will notice you. So just accept that and put a fleece and some comfy trousers on

As a designer, working some of the time in fashion retail, some of the time at achingly cool agencies (where I am thankfully invisable) I regularly see guys in their 40’s and even 50’s trying waaaay too hard – sporting skinny jeans, sculpted waxed facial hair, boating shoes with no socks etc. The full hipster look

Its tragic

Get a bloody grip ..
I’m a 62 year old bloke ..admittedly my best years are behind me..but aged 42 I attracted the eye of a stunning 25 year old lass..
20 years later and we are still together..very happily so with a sixteen year old son ..and.. aged 45 she is still as fit looking ..and I’m a lucky bloke ..

I didn’t realise I was doing it but then I noticed I was, and now I realise I do it every time.

Ignoring the big-headed freak (well, obviously something is freakishly big) above. I think IHN and Perchy will be pleased to know, that once your 40s are over and you reach mid-50s, the reaction to these 20s+ women passes. Not only do they not notice you, but you stop noticing them.

Except maybe on telly, where the rewind button on the remote gets a bit erm.. worn.

😉😁
If that was referencing me Dez..I can only wish!
Decidedly average mate..

I think IHN and Perchy will be pleased to know, that once your 40s are over and you reach mid-50s, the reaction to these 20s+ women passes.

Nope. Not even slightly. 67 and I notice every time. I spend 90% of my life trying to hide the fact I self identify as Sid James.
Luckily my pathetic nature includes still thinking riding bikes through puddles is epic. I think my development stopped at the age of 17.

I spend 90% of my life trying to hide the

…

I approached the carriage return on my screen with much trepidation.
Perve.

🙂

54. Not too fat, could be fitter. Dental assistant, who is in her 60’s, offered to help me put my jacket on the other day out of pity.

mid-50s, the reaction to these 20s+ women passes. Not only do they not notice you, but you stop noticing them.

Not quite true – you just start assuming anyone under 30 is about 16 years old, and wondering why their mother lets them out of the house dressed like that.

 I immediately assume that she views me as some sort of deviant sexual predator even though I’d much rather just have a nice bowl of soup these days.

It’s the way you lean against that lamppost, and as for what you are doing with your little stick of Blackpool rock well is it any wonder they give you a wide berth.

think best to cut the George Formby references unless old age is the new middle age – Formby died in 1961…I was born in 1959 and have vague recollections of aged relatives laughing at him on that expensive we just got one new fangled* 2 channel black and white TV

*gave you that one for free

All I see so far are some pretty amateur levels of pathetic middle aged man acceptance, so hold onto your cocoa and prepare to be impressed…

After leaving the military and realising I could no longer fall back on Middle East tans, fresh war stories and my “nothing to do during downtime but hit the gym” sculptured body to impress the young ladies I made a plan.

What profession features lots of young, often attractive females who may find a collection of old war stories ‘interesting’? What profession also enables you to routinely display your caring nature in front of said attractive young females and will occasionally find you at work social functions, where the ratio of attractive young females to men (let alone increasingly saggy middle aged ones) is firmly in your favour?

Welcome to the world of nursing, where your dad jokes are laughed at by women young enough to be your daughters and where, when out on social functions, you turn full-on self-designated protector to ward off young, non-healthcare connected males from ‘your’ group of females.

😉

t’s the way you lean against that lamppost, and as for what you are doing with your little stick of Blackpool rock well is it any wonder they give you a wide berth.

It’s when i start “strumming my banjolele” that they really get the fear.

What profession features lots of young, often attractive females who may find a collection of old war stories ‘interesting’?

You are Mark Francois and I claim my blue passport.

Welcome to the world of nursing, where your dad jokes are laughed at by women young enough to be your daughters and where, when out on social functions, you turn full-on self-designated protector to ward off young, non-healthcare connected males from ‘your’ group of females.

This feels like it should be voiced by Sir David Attenborough.

you turn full-on self-designated protector to ward off young, non-healthcare connected males from ‘your’ group of females.

This a million times. I share a house with a couple of pretty girls who work in a local pub. I hear the stuff they have to listen to, get a bit annoyed on their behalf and then realise:
a) They can handle it very easily having had that attention most of their lives and b) what was i actually going to do? Nothing that would end well.

You are Mark Francois and I claim my blue passport.

How dare you Sir, how very dare you.

#i❤eu

The last woman I asked out actually laughed out loud…
IME people who think they are pathetic have a lot going for them but just can’t see it, whereas the big heads need bringing down a peg or two.

It is odd how otherwise very attractive women in their 20s who 20 years ago would have registered pretty highly on the lobometer scale now barely raise a flutter. Are we programmed to find people of roughly the same age attractive or is it some sort of built in rejection defence mechanism?

I’m 47 white male married with 2 teenage kids – don’t have dull desk job tbf and am in generally good shape, however: During a recent lunchtime discussion my entirely female team (the eldest of whom is 30) were having about certain filmstars – Chris Pratt was described as having a “Dad bod” – I of course made the mistake of asking what this meant and they were all too embarrassed to tell me.

Are we programmed to find people of roughly the same age attractive or is it some sort of built in rejection defence mechanism?

Combination of the 2 I suspect.
I mean – that Holliday Grainger on the telly, I could look at her all bleedin day, but there’s no way she’ll ever get a chance to reject me! The bitch. 😆

Remember The Sixth Sense? The world is just like that, except it’s not dead and living, it’s over 35’s and under 35’s. We’re invisible to them, they just hear vague whispers telling them what to do, which they promptly ignore.

The plus side of this effect is when a bunch of teenagers are running around stabbing each other with knives, they completely ignore you too.

Anyway I’m 51, my wife is 37 and completely ignores me. Again not necessarily a bad thing.

Never sure if that reaction to an attractive woman makes me a dirty middle aged man or not, just to add to my confusion.

How sad am I? Last night in Tesco I remembered I needed a new pair of slippers. As they had a security tag, decided it was easier to go to a staffed checkout. I chose the less attractive middle aged checkout assistant rather than the cute uni age one, just in case she had low expectations, even lower self esteem and father issues and couldn’t control herself..🙄

I get all self conscious and modify my behaviour to try not to come across as a creepy pervert,

… thus ensuring that you do come across as exactly that. (-:

… thus ensuring that you do come across as exactly that. (-:

I know, right?

It’s probably the balaclava that does it