He coughs, he dies. Movie spoilers.

Watched “Radioactive” on the iPlayer the other night with the family. Interesting, but not exactly a barrel of laughs. At one point a character coughs and my daughter pipes up with “Well, that’s him dead”.

Same thing happens in the Beatrix Potter film. Obi Wan has a cough at the train station and in the next scene they are burying him.

Has anyone in movie history survived a coughing fit?

Or a nosebleed. 100% fatal in Hollywood.

On the other hand, heart attacks are surprisingly OK. A few pumps of chest compression and a bit of mouth to mouth and the hero jumps right back up and re-commences gunning down the bad guys.

A heart felt declaration of love, or finally reconciled…

…enjoy your car crash sucka.

Conversely, a gunshot wound to the shoulder or thigh can be treated with a sit down on the tail gate of a truck/ambulance and a coffee/cigarette.

Sometime it is necessary to wrap a blanket around their shoulders.

On the other hand, heart attacks are surprisingly OK

As is head trauma.

Anytime you need a character to be unavailable so the plot can progress then just give them a donk on the head and they’ll have a nice nap for anything from a minute to several hours.

They’ll then wake up saying, ‘Uuh, my head’ before jumping back into action.

Not my experience of seeing someone knocked unconscious for 90 seconds ( a week in a dark room and then about 6 months before being more or less fully functional again) but the movie version seems alright.

Conversely, a gunshot wound to the shoulder

The hero can take all sorts of wounds with barely a groan or wince, when the love interest dabs at a wound with antiseptic or pulls the bandage too tight; it’s agony.

Che-coughs gun innit.

PSA: If you’ve never heard of Chekovs Gun before …. DO NOT GOOGLE IT.  It will ruin pretty much every movie, book and TV show you ever watch forever.

never look at a picture of the wife and kids in a war movie.

never stare longingly at the barbed wire as a POW

Ah, there’s loads of them that annoy me, people getting blasted back 10 metres after an explosion just relaxing on the car they’ve landed on, reality is their internal organs would be mush, same with landmines, you see a movie, you hear a click and they’re stood on it and can’t take their foot off, that’s not how pressure plates work.

This is a good website for spotting things like this and it also has an entry for the OP…

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/IncurableCoughOfDeath

Che-coughs gun innit.

The principle that every gadget Bond is presented with at the start of the film will be miraculously useful at some point later on.

I really want to see a Bond spoof where he gets in a spot of bother and reaches for his gadgets before giving up in disgust cos none of them are right.

What if I were to tell you it’s a thing?

PSA: If you’ve never heard of Chekovs Gun before …. DO NOT GOOGLE IT.  It will ruin pretty much every movie, book and TV show you ever watch forever.

Especially if the gun doesn’t get used. Winds me right up.

the Beatrix Potter film. Obi Wan has a cough at the train station

Erm, I’m clearly missing something here… please explain

Ewan McGregor.

Just as it looks like him and Renee will fall in love and live happily ever after with all of the cartoon bunnies he has a cough at the train station.

And dies.

If she’d shot him he would have lived.

Erm, I’m clearly missing something here… please explain

You mean that you haven’t watched ‘Episode II – Attack of the Flopsy Bunnies’ or ‘Episode V – Mrs Tiggy Winkle strikes back’??!!

Actually, if she’s shot the rabbit I wouldn’t have had to sit through the two recent movies.

At least it took a long time for Walter White

A bit of stomach ache when you’re in outer space is not a good sign.

A couple of Rennies ain’t gonna sort that problem out.

Thermal imaging through walls. Erm no. If that worked thermal camouflage would be pointless.

Uma Thurman’s nosebleed in Pulp Fiction wasn’t fatal.

You mean that you haven’t watched ‘Episode II – Attack of the Flopsy Bunnies’ or ‘Episode V – Mrs Tiggy Winkle strikes back’??!!

Ah, silly me 😂

Uma Thurman’s nosebleed in Pulp Fiction wasn’t fatal.

Well, it was. Just not permanently so.

Thermal imaging through walls. Erm no.

That’s pretty niche knowledge. Maybe our baddie is leaning against said wall, and it’s really conductive. 😊

Well, it was. Just not permanently so.

From my recollection Mia Wallace died and then was reincarnated as Brian Molko of Placebo.

Which will have a been a surprise to Marcellus.

She gives him a smouldering look. They lock eyes. They have sex,. Ten seconds later it’s all done inclusive of foreplay and everyone’s happy.

So quite a lot like real life, thinking about it.

I’m worried about Toronaga-Sama’s cough now.

The hero can take all sorts of wounds with barely a groan or wince, when the love interest dabs at a wound with antiseptic or pulls the bandage too tight; it’s agony.

I like the Avengers approach to hero-wounding. Tony Stark gets a big sword stuck through him, puts some miracle spray on, good to go. Small nuke dropped on their HQ? No casualties!

for me it’s any movie that starts with a family with a single young child happily playing together.  You just know that the family are about to get killed to ‘justify’ 2 hours of revenge filled nonsense

PSA: If you’ve never heard of Chekovs Gun before …. DO NOT GOOGLE IT.  It will ruin pretty much every movie, book and TV show you ever watch forever.

Probably my favourite example, usually they aren’t fleshed out at all, this one had an entire segment in the film and it was memorable 🤣

Sign takes chekovs gun to the absolute limit…

The people in John Wick,  primarily Mr Wick himself, have an amazing ability to survive an almost continuous succession of fatal stair falls.