Grow up FFS

My mate built a tree house for his son, then promptly spent the first night sleeping in it.. His son (6) was furious, so was his wife come to think of it.

I ACTUALLY NEED THIS!

No seriously I do.

Forty three thousand pieces. 😯

I outsprint Steve Ovett on a regular basis 😯 (when he was in his heyday of course!(

I think, if I’d built that, I’d look as smug as he does.

Just thought of another. My gf likes to give me obscure words or phrases to try and fit into my lectures. It always makes me smile when i do it.

I still mentally recite the theme tune to Airwolf, not just on swoopy singletrack, but during any activity that involves weaving between things (e.g. just walking down a busy street and yes, pushing supermarket trolleys)

Sometime I catch myself leaning in a bit too noticeably as Santini says “They’re right behind us String” and I have to take evasive action.

When my kids mention one of their friends by their first name I have to make up a stupid last name. For example:
Daughter ‘You know Leah?’
Sparkle ‘Leah Jet?’

‘Gail.’
‘Gail Forcewind?’

Sparkle
49

God, yeah, I do that or something similar – like sing a song with their name in. Luckily, he’s only 9 so still finds it funny 🙂

Anyone else pull off some rad trolley 360 action?

I work part time at a supermarket and I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve been told off by managers for doing this 😳 😀

I also like to make up random lines of conversation when walking past people just to see if they’re listening, stuff like ‘and then I farted so hard I pooped a bit’ 😀

I gaffer taped sparklers to my bike when solo night riding on Saturday night and made noises like the millenium falcon as I whooshed downhill.

Unfortunately they only lasted 30secs to I had to revert to motorbike noises to keep the scary night beasties away.

ps I’m 43

I still buy books of Peanuts cartoons.
I make up songs about our cat, including the word “fluffy” as often as possible..or ideally “fwuffy”.
When I undress for bed, I have to flick my underpants off my toe and catch them on my head. My wife hates this – but she’s jealous because she can’t do it properly.
46 and three quarters.

When my kids mention one of their friends by their first name I have to make up a stupid last name. For example:
Daughter ‘You know Leah?’
Sparkle ‘Leah Jet?’

Nicholas.

“… Girlsshouldntclimbtrees?

When asked, “Have you farted?” I will always reply, “No. Would you like me to?”

WOW i need to pull this one.

5 jaffa cakes dispatched in less than 1 minute. beating my three kids. get in there….

Still 45

Reading this thread i really hope I get worse with age!

It’s been the first thread in a long time thats made me proper lol!
Thanks all x

Juan, de rien mon vieux!

Pleased to report that several enemy planes were destroyed over the North East of the US this morning…! They strayed in to the crosshairs, you see 🙂

Another – When standing at a pedestrian crossing, pressing the button blows up whatever vehicle is on the crossing at that point. KABOOM!

5 jaffa cakes dispatched in less than 1 minute. beating my three kids. get in there….

With respect, I don’t think you’re really trying. I’ll have to have a go at that.

You just try cougar. Do your best with a quintet of little deviant cakes.

I like to re-arrange the spice jars in tesco that have the big letters on the front to make rude words on the shelf.

AMAZING, I want to go shopping now just to do this

Toast.

morgs – Member
I like to re-arrange the spice jars in tesco that have the big letters on the front to make rude words on the shelf.

AMAZING, I want to go shopping now just to do this

On a similar note, I can’t go past a shop display of action figures or soft toys without rearranging them in compromise positions…

Also, egg/kitchen timers all have to be set to 5 minutes after I plan to leave the shop, and any “press to try me” noise making toys all have to be pressed before I can leave….

Also, egg/kitchen timers all have to be set to 5 minutes after I plan to leave the shop, and any “press to try me” noise making toys all have to be pressed before I can leave….

*High fives fellow sad-shopper!*

Me (41) and my work mate (48) have wheelie contests when we ride to work together – in shirts and ties 🙂

He wins as he used to be a red hot motocrosser.

Elfinsafety – Member

I ACTUALLY NEED THIS!

No seriously I do.

Why do you want Louis Theroux’s ironing board?

A mate of mine always tries to work out who is following him. That might just be a sign of mental illness though.

As an aside, I try and stack as much of my supermarket shopping on top of one another on the conveyor belt . You can make huge wobbly towers of shopping that take up hardly any space at all.
This can , and does sometimes go horribly wrong with the resulting structual failure leaving bread or yoghurts the wrong side of the shopping divider . This then results in tutting and general shaking of heads from the other shoppers .
As i normally have my MP3 on i really dont give a damn , its childish and funny and takes away some of the tedium of shopping.
rob aged 42 1/2

Every torch becomes a sighting system for a super powerful/highly accurate weapon of my choice…

Never use the dividers on the conveyor belts in the supermarket & score points if the shoppers in front/behind put them in place for you. *Always* keeps the wife amused that one.

Pass Foxes Riding School on the Chester High Road and always wonder out loud “How do earth do they get the foxes to do that?”…

*Every* set of stairs in any office block becomes a task of figuring out whether they can be ridden down.

Can’t wait to teach Jnr about the finger pulling!

36 and a half.

When driving through here, I always do.

any “press to try me” noise making toys all have to be pressed before I can leave….

I once set off Toys R Us’s entire stock of Tickle Me Elmos off at once. I thought the shelf was going to collapse.

CaptainFlashheart – Member
When driving through here, I always do.

As long as when riding through here just down the road from there, you try not to.

slainte 🙂 rob

another one, when I set away for work in the morning I sing the tune from Thunderbirds in my head – but sometimes it comes out aloud – oops. 56

Every morning when I get my banana for my lunch, I slide a clip in and cock it and then shoot both my kids.
(What would Freud say?)

pressing all the buttons in a lift will always be fun. hiding in the dark and scaring mrsconsequence/making her jump will never fail to amuse me. waving at strangers is fun, when being introduced to someone for the first time it’s fun to say ‘oh we’ve met, don’t worry’ and leave them wondering why they don’t remember meeting you all day.

This thread makes me feel worryingly mature.

Do you people really want Star Wars lego?!?!

In my defense, I do not want Lego. I draw the line at fantasy cycling moments and jaffacake war.

Dave – those things aren’t immature though, they’re normal, but lego… 😕

I’m sat in the office reading this whilst also looking for a BMX for myself, decided yesterday that I needed one in my life (I’ve no idea what sort I need, just that I need one)

Also recently bought myself a new longboard, and spent half of my life wearing T Shirts and Shorts, (todays T Shirts says ‘pussy magnet’)

Tried growing up once, it didn’t suit me

Im 36, but most people say i’m 6!!!

More toys fellas, more toys..

In the car, on dual carriageway/motorway with wife in passenger seat I’m quite fond of slow overtakes.
It has to be the same car as mine, when passing I slow down so we are neck and neck, other driver looks across, I give thumbs up and point at wife. She then crumples into the footwell in a mixture of shame, embarrassment and pant wetting giggling.
She then asks if they are gone, I say yes, she sits up and they are still there etc, etc. Normally pull forward once I start to get embarrassed by my own behaviour.

Also still fond of some arm pumping airhorn action with passing trucks.

Also like encouraging motorcycles to pass fast when on the roadbike, when one comes up behind sounding fast they often throttle off a bit so as not to upset the cyclist, thats when I do some windmill arms in a ‘wind ‘er up’ motion. Love it when biker responds by wellying it past full chat. 🙂

Tooundred! 😀

Do you people really want Star Wars lego?!?!

Yes.

Star wars + Lego = Megawin.