[Closed] Just saw the worst film ever

Even worse than the Clash of the Titans remake?

Are you seriously suggesting that this is worse than War Horse?

Or GI Joe, Rise of the Cobra?

It can't be [i]THAT[/i] bad can it?

I am now tearing into this to try to forget how much worse that pile of crap was
[img] [/img]

Edit: And yes, it was worse than all of those, at least some of those had special effects to ease the pain slightly. It's even worse than Immortals

Fine choice of whisky, if not a fine choice of [s]woman[/s] film.

Has no-one seen "Hanna"? I was so irritated by it at the pictures, I nearly bought it on DVD just so I could smash it to pieces. What a load of sh...

Quite right Dogbert. It is a nice dram that one.

'Worst film' is quite a bold claim.

Now you're not expecting me to believe that his film is worse than Battlefield Earth are you?

I've not watched it, but this is currently on virgin ondemand:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2141875/

'Osombie: Axis of evil dead' Description: Osama bin laden returns from the dead to start a zombie army

Quite right Dogbert. It is a nice dram that one.

Cheers, mate brought it over for me from Australia because he forgot the fridge magnets he promised me......result!

This is the worst film ever.

http://www.lovefilm.com/film/Sleeping-Beauty/166321/

Unfathomable, Disturbing and in the end unwatchable.

I watched The Grey last night. Was bored stupid and as for the ending 🙄

Worst film I saw was the wrong 5 minutes of Brokeback Mountain, I thought they were having a friendly wrestle while out camping but my wife explained the bees and the bees to me.

I had to change over to watch Rambo.

I watched 2012 the other night. We were warned. That it was pish. But I still watched it. 😳

See "Worst Film" is a difficult one.

You've got mediocre drivel like the OP posted. You've got genuine poorly made rubbish - think anything on the SciFi channel - Octoshark comes to mind

Then you've got films that promise everything, are gloriously shot, have lots of talented people in them - working on them. But end up being absolute drivel.

Yes Warhorse I'm talking about you!

obviously none of you have ever seen melancholia!

Worst film ever is R.O.T.O.R
Closely followed by Assassins Code.

You really haven't seen the worst movie ever made until you have seen this:

[img] [/img]

You've got genuine poorly made rubbish - think anything on the SciFi channel - Octoshark comes to mind

At least the people in those films don't seem to mind & they realise they're making something bobbins....

Then you get films like Transformers - I liked the first one, but the next 2 were just utter bobbins

Not a touch on this:

Sieze the day (1986) Robin Williams.

You keep watching it because it can't get any worse, right, it's got to get better. Wanted to slit my wrists by the end.

I agree that Faces in the Crowd was indeed awful, however you need to have see the US remake of Get Carter before you start talking about worst film ever.

Nope, tried to watch this the other day:

The trailer made it seem interesting, the film was as bad as a failing film students attempt using their own family as actors..

It was so bad, it made this watcheable:

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck starring in - Gigli. AArrrggghh, utter tosh, rubbish, no story, bad acting, awful film.

I walked out of the 'Bodyguard', that was mind numbingly bad too.

Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion. Remains to this day the only film I have fallen asleep during whilst in the cinema. Utter pish.

And I raise you:
[url= http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0297169/ ]Holiday in the Sun[/url]

My candidate. Open Water.

Utterly dreadful, unless watching two thoroughly dislikeable people float about whining at each other for an hour is your idea of a good time. The most exciting bit is when one of them needs a wee (I'll not ruin it for you by telling you which one). Its only saving grace is a brief spot of gratuitous nudity at the beginning.

Only film I ever walked out on was Contact, just awful.

My vote is "mega-python vs Gataroid" starring Tiffany. They feed alligators steroids to combat giant, nae mega sized pythons. That's right! Stinker.

Wouldn't mind have a try of that whisky tho'!

Debbie Gibson's in that too, if memory serves.

The Happening.

after about 30mins of Open Water, I was rooting for the sharks

ooh forgot about showgirls.

Very nearly walked out of Transformers 2, that was shit.

Stopped watching a couple of DVDs/TV films, the last one that springs to mind was Rock N Rolla, the Guy Ritchie film. Also one about some massive snake in captivity that escapes. The name of the film escapes me, thankfully forgotten.

[b]alfabus[/b]
obviously none of you have ever seen melancholia!

This.
Beat the previous holder "The Tree of Life" which was 2 hours of people running around the garden from what I recall...

So, no one's seen Taxidermia?

Beautiful film, but very, very sick indeed.

obviously none of you have ever seen melancholia!

I loved Melancholia!!

Sleeping Beauty, though - that WAS a pile of pish.

[url= http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101700/ ]Delicatessen[/url] was painfully dull and awful to watch.

Jean-Pierre Jeunet then went onto make the one film that makes me grin the whole way through.

We saw Hanna at the cinema a while ago, the first 5 minutes were excellent but it did run downhill rather quickly from there, but nowhere near the worst film ever.

Surely any of the slushy, vapid US romcom sh**e that my mrs watches qualifies? It's all exactly the same (same "plot", same cast, same irritating muzack) so surely qualifies as just one film?

I walked out of Date Night in the cinema. Painful to watch, was that (and I was there for the GF who also happily walked out).

And

my wife explained the bees and the bees to me

Melancholia was superb! Utterly utterly depressing, but then that's the whole point - some great acting in it though.

Worst film vote here is Ultraviolet (again with Milla Jovovich - do I sense a theme here....) - just utter drivel. Honestly didn't have a clue what was going on for pretty much all of it, took itself WAY too seriously, and properly dodgy acting. AVOID!

Hanna was excellent.
Transformers 2 was a film about robots killing each other. WTF did you expect? Does what it says on the tin. Or were you the idiot who reviewed it in the Metro and marked it down because "it was just robots killing each other". No sh*t Sherlock...

Worst film must be Attack The Block. Watched that in stunned silence on lovefilm the other night. Bloody hell...

Did anybody other than me see the sequel to the excellent Carlitos Way, 'Carlitos Way 2: Rise to Power', if not then maybe it was just a bad dream after all?

Worst film must be Attack The Block. Watched that in stunned silence on lovefilm the other night. Bloody hell...

I watched this (again, via LF) a couple of weeks back. It's supposed to be brilliant and, whilst it's not the 'worst film' by any stretch, I was very disappointed.

I wonder if part of it is just me being Northern; I've no frame of reference, no means of identifying with the Lahndan yoof. If a film doesn't cause you to empathise with the antagonists then it has to pull out the stops in other ways, and ATB really just didn't. Maybe if I'd grown up in our fine capital then it might've resonated more with me.

Shame, really.

I'm sorry but, although there have been some excellent suggestions, this is without doubt the worst film ever made. Especially so if you possess a 'Y' chromosome but not exclusively, women can hate it too.

[img] [/img]

Meeting Joe Black.

Please die already. All of you. Now.

AI

How many endings can a film have. All rubbish. Is it wrong to want to punch a (robot) child?

If we are to discuss 'hostile' audiences whilst watching something that is a matter of taste, then it has to be a GF dragging me to a packed screen at one of the local cinemas to watch Mama Mia. I was just trying to sit there and get through the film, minding my own business, but surrounded by hundreds of screaming, singing women that were jumping around, banging my seat and creating real fear in me have probably produced one of the worst viewing experiences I've ever lived through.

Almost as bad as the time me and a mate had the misfortune to walk past the entrance of a theatre in Scarborough when hundreds of drunken, sex starved middle aged (and above) women piled out of a Chippendales show.

Killer Elite. At first glance you think "Hmmm... DeNiro, Clive Owen..." then you ignore the fact the "star" is Jason Statham. Just total drivel from start to finish despite the fact it's based on a true story. Apparently.

some film that had a woman as the lead like a female Bourne identity, with Ewan Mcgregor playing a bit part, it was only 6 months ago and I can't remember the title, nor can I be bothered to google it.

"The Boat That Rocked"

The only cinema showing that I've ever walked-out of -plenty of others did the same.

Truly, truly dire.

I watched Hobo with a Shotgun, and I can see why it gets a cult following - it's awful!!

The Boat That Rocked... remember seeing the adverts for that and even they made me want to stick pins in my eyes.

Or GI Joe, Rise of the Cobra?

this + a number that looks a lot like a sideways 8...

My vote is "mega-python vs Gataroid" starring Tiffany. They feed alligators steroids to combat giant, nae mega sized pythons. That's right! Stinker.

I remember watching that on syfy. It was up to the usual syfy standard, however it stayed on as I have a thing for Tiffany. The police tell me she doesn't want it though. 😳

She's still well hot. Better for loosing the denim jacket in a shopping centre.

She's still well hot. Better for loosing the denim jacket in a shopping centre.

You know she did playboy I assume? As did Debbie Gibson

You know she did playboy I assume? As did Debbie Gibson

WHAT?

hmm, probably shouldn't google that at work.......

some film that had a woman as the lead like a female Bourne identity, with Ewan Mcgregor playing a bit part, it was only 6 months ago and I can't remember the title, nor can I be bothered to google it.

this?

[img] [/img]

Utter Chuffing Bobbins......I was expecting so much more and something that resembled a film, not an art-house take on a female Bourne

Transformers 2 was a film about robots killing each other.

It wasn't though, that was the problem. There was FAR too much Shia Labouef / Megan Whatsherface general blathering, and nowhere NEAR enough robots smacking the crap out of each other. 3 was ok though.

I quite enjoyed Haywire.

@dogbert - Yep - that was it! -absolute tripe- story was completely full of holes

Anyone said 'Coyote Ugly' ? - unconscionable sh*te. Just one long and hugely boring Martini advert.

It wasn't though, that was the problem. There was FAR too much Shia Labouef / Megan Whatsherface general blathering, and nowhere NEAR enough robots smacking the crap out of each other. 3 was ok though.

I think where the Transformers films went wrong is that they took themselves far too seriously for what should have been films about big robots kicking the crap out of each other. The first one is passable enough because of the novelty to turn your brain off but the other two tried to get too serious. This is where The Avengers was so good I think - Joss Whedon managed to write it so there was a lot of action, you cared about the characters and plot, but it didn't take itself seriously at all and in places could almost of have been a comedy (and that worked!).

Setup. Just don't.

For those who can't follow orders: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1748197/

there should be categories of badness, cause some films are bad because of low budgets bad scripts and cheap special effects.

examples of this are...

[url= http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0067515/ ]Octaman[/url]
[url= http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0192251/ ]lionman[/url]

two truly awful productions.

some film are quite "polished" and have had plenty of money thrown at them and are still bad and quite a few have been mentioned above, transformers haywire etc High budget B-movies.

I think where the Transformers films went wrong is that they took themselves far too seriously for what should have been films about big robots kicking the crap out of each other. The first one is passable enough because of the novelty to turn your brain off but the other two tried to get too serious. This is where The Avengers was so good I think - Joss Whedon managed to write it so there was a lot of action, you cared about the characters and plot, but it didn't take itself seriously at all and in places could almost of have been a comedy (and that worked!).

Melancholia was the worst I've seen this year , truly bloody awful. Usually anything with an ex Friends star in it will be bad (especially Chandler). Also the Date / Epic movie spoof by the Wayans brothers.

Setup. Just don't.

What was it about a film with 50-cent, Ryan Phillipe and Bruce Willis that didn't scream AVOID!!!!!! to you?

Another awful film I saw, but this one is supposed to be a classic.

[url= http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0071910/ ]The Night Porter[/url]

The dark and melancholy story of a former teenage Nazi concentration camp inmate, Lucia, and the S.S. officer who was her torturer/lover, Max , who accidentally meet again in a Vienna hotel in 1957 where Max works as the night porter. They resume their sadomasochistic relationship, although Max's former S.S. comrades have something different in mind for them

Awful dross.

3 clear contenders....

Burn [s]after reading[/s] before watching - a good cast wasted
The men who stare at goats ditto
The [s]curious[/s] tedious case of benjamin button - far too long to get to.the horrid and inevitable ending.

And while I am having a strop .... Inception ....ffs

Transformers 3 was Hoping for a unplug brain ( big robot fights etc) drain a few beers and chill it was utter pony turned it off in the end!

Looking forward to avengers and Prometheus though!!!

I'll agree that Open Water is utterly dire. Irreversable has got to be up there too. I'd also to mention this: [url= http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=554050497526469743 ]Not sure i dare write the title here[/url]

You are only scratching the surface of awful films, I'll raise it a bit with Mama Mia, even well lubricated with a days worth of various lagers I couldn't take more than five minutes of it.