Sandwich - Member
Watch you don't peg out jamj.
Ouch! No thanks!
I've got an unbelievably argumentative 9 year old I can deploy at a moment's notice.
tell them they are stealing the wif fi for maximum rage attack points.
Meat cleaver in the top of wardrobe, only need to hit them once or twice, but that’s only if they come into the bedroom.
I got beat up in a pub when I was a teenager. There were rumours that the blokes were after me so that I couldn't act as a witness (as they were getting thrown out of the pub they seriously injured the DJ). I used to wake up from drunken nights out with a lump of wood with nails sticking out under my bed. Turns out I was quite a paranoid drunk!
Nowadays the front and back hallways resemble the shoe department at TK Maxx on a Saturday afternoon. An intruder will unwittingly break their neck before they get to the non existent family riches.
All this talk of front door protection.....
What if the scoundrel is hell bent on smashing your back doors in ?
Have a number of bows around the place upstairs. Could be pretty devastating, but not at close range, and assembling and/or stringing them might be an issue if the instruder can move quicker than a snail.
Probably have to grab an arrow and stab instead...
What if the scoundrel is hell bent on smashing your back doors in ?
I'd recommend relaxing.
I would never chase some wee d1cks out of our close for setting fireworks off with a piece of 2x2 with a nail hanging out of it whilst being upstaged my my neighbour who rocked up with a Samaria sword. Nope, that never happened. Gotta love Glasgow.
The one time someone tried to force their way into my house I punched him in the face and slammed the door on his arm. I felt like a badass. Was then anxious four the next 6 months that he'd come back tooled up to deal with my bad assery with a suitable selection of guns/knives/siege weapons. He never did, but I still worry. Though I possibly broke his arm.
I suppose I could 'have at' a would-be assailant with an ill-tuned ukulele?
Just play it, he'll leave
My wave around deterrent was the timing chain from a jawa 350 when I lived where such things were needed.
This is such a funny thread - loving all the posts. I think most of you need one of these:
Nothing at home but I do have a lot of stuff at the shop which was easily to hand when the riots were on.
Not that anything happened but the first herbert through the door was getting a shovel in the face.
The cops came around and gave us all a rules of engagement leaflet and buggered off!
I didn’t need to be attacked , just to feel threatened before I could splat someone.
Something definitely stirred in me and was slightly disappointed when the arseholes couldn’t be bothered to leave Sutton.
I've asked about the paperweights, it's because we agreed they look nice there.
There's also half a dozen chilli plants, two and a half pairs of walking poles, four random wooden walking sticks, two large purple windmill lawn ornaments and 18 pairs of footwear.
Just the usual throwing stars, nunchucks, you know for dealing with overzealous Jovos and charity collectors.
It's not Surrey round hear. Everyone's got a muppet tenderiser next to the door for dealing with cartoon Rambo's like this.
Burglars will probably head to the kitchen and pick up one of your Wushtof (sp) chef tools or stab you in the eye with a pointed stick.
Weapons in your house ffs who are you and what are you expecting?
Everyone's got a muppet tenderiser next to the door for dealing with cartoon Rambo's like this.
I think the rumour was this guy was an ex-SAS guy. Probs shit all truth in that but fair play to him.
I reckon a high lumen bike light and a tin of sand are as good a defence as anything. Your enemy can't see you, he can't fight. YES SENSAI
Nothing at home but I do have a lot of stuff at the shop which was easily to hand when the riots were on.
Ha, that reminds me of a time in my old shop - I was busy brazing, oxyacetylene torch in hand, when a dodgy-looking lad ran in with a kitchen knife. He took one look at the 2' blue-hot flame and ran out again 😀
I've a Tesco security guard in the loft 😆
I am a weapon.......of mass consumption thou, they wouldn’t get far in our hose without tripping over the amazon/CRC packing strewn around the passage.
I don’t begrudge anyone having a maglite about is as it’s actually useful anything else seems a tad overkill and likely to end up either over your head or stuck in you.
Having a dog which goes barkshit mental if he hears a mouse fart seems to be more useful , although I do seem to spend a lot of time in my pants in the garden in the early morning keeping the thing happy.
me personally, no. I find the house alarm is defence enough but Danny, the captain of my old Croydon Sunday league football team keeps a 'commemorative Celtic FC baseball bat' that he [url= http://www.itv.com/news/london/2014-10-24/croydon-pub-landlord-fights-off-would-be-burglars-with-a-baseball-bat/ ]occasionally gets to use[/url] as the landlord of a pub in Croydon (ff the you tube vid to 1:40).
I was right back and he was centre back for about 4 seasons. His defending was a bit heavy handed too, just like this video.
no weapons but i do keep my windmill arms at the ready
Naked is your best weapon against thugs and burglars ..... if your naked they don’t know what your going to do next
I keep a rounders stick in the landing cupboard with the other sports stuff. The last time I used it was when somebody was snooping in my Garden and the dogs went off, turned out to be a Policeman trying to catch a burglar. I think it's sensible to have a cudgel around the place.
[url= http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Club_(weapon) ]Clubbing[/url]
I'm sure it's already been said, if you got a weapon you need to be willing to us it and know how to us it. Most people who choose a crime lifestyle are often comfortable with a degree of violence that normal people are not. Don't expect someone who has chosen burglary as a career to immediately back down if you wave a weapon about.
OP, how about fitting a spy hole or camera intercom, then you can decide if you even want to open the door.
I would have said no, but since we got broken into twice in a fortnight I've gone [i]slightly[/i] paranoid and without fail, whenever I go to investigate a suspicious noise or one of my cheap alarms going off for no reason, I always end up with the same 3 foot breaker bar, and an old LED torch I have with a ludicriously powerful strobe mode, in my hands.
spursn17 - MemberI know someone who once went downstairs to confront a burglar with a Nerf gun!
Hah, to be fair I could do worse than to take out my ludicrously powerful modded one- load it with those really dodgy cheap bullets I got from china and you don't want to get shot in the eye with it 😆 If it was an air one it'd be illegal but because it's electric it's fine
Have an assegai in my bedroom wardrobe, just in case any lions are roaming the great rift valley of Stockport.
After visits from prospectors followed by one break-in whilst I was at work, I kept a two-foot length (small lobby space) of broomstick handle, rounded off at both ends, by the door.
One jab to the diaphragm would do it.
Since leaving South-East Ruritania for hazy, lazy Andalucia, I've doubted that i need it anymore.
Still keep it in the cupboard though. You never know.
In my current house, I have not once (touch wood) felt any need for any protection. In my last one, however, I was flipping paranoid.
We lived through one attempted break in, and while we had always felt vulnerable before this, afterward I think I never slept easy again.
The thing is, I have always been afraid of the idea that any weapon I might wield could be easily taken from me and used against me.
Of the flight, fight, freeze possibilities, I'm definitely a freezer. 🙁
me personally, no. I find the house alarm is defence enough but Danny, the captain of my old Croydon Sunday league football team keeps a 'commemorative Celtic FC baseball bat' that he occasionally gets to use as the landlord of a pub in Croydon (ff the you tube vid to 1:40).I was right back and he was centre back for about 4 seasons. His defending was a bit heavy handed too, just like this video.
Best bit of that is the article stating that he 'chased the burglars away' 😆 I saw it more as 'beat the living shite out of!' He looked knackered from the effort of repeatedly smacking the second bloke!
Jeez where do you lot live???
I've never felt the need for a weapon by the door or in the car. Though I do have Marmite at the foot of the bed.
[url= https://farm5.staticflickr.com/4475/37438306020_86e173fa38_b.jp g" target="_blank">https://farm5.staticflickr.com/4475/37438306020_86e173fa38_b.jp g"/> [/img][/url][url= https://flic.kr/p/Z3i73Q ]Marmite Roll-1[/url] by [url= https://www.flickr.com/photos/warnesworld/ ]Ian Warnes[/url], on Flickr
After visits from prospectors followed by one break-in whilst I was at work, I kept a two-foot length (small lobby space) of broomstick handle
You must work [b]very [/b]close to home if a two-foot stick is enough.
I remember my Grandad used to keep a truncheon hidden in the fake flowers by his front door. He led quite a colourful life so I suspect this was destined more for people he knew, than a random stranger.
My 92 year old Nan keeps my Grandads old truncheon beside her bed.
Bianchi-Boy - MemberJeez where do you lot live???
What does it matter. The concern is the same whether you live in an inner city shit hole or a 6 bedroom country home with an acre of land around it, you may be the unlucky victim of a burglary.
But really as above there's no point carrying anything unless you can be certain you won't hesitate to use it. God knows what it's like to face someone down with a lethal weapon that could potentially kill or disable with one blow. Chances are you'll choke and end up getting beaten with it.
Edit: Also, there are a million fights on youtube and particularly Worldstarhiphop, many involving weapons. They are often random and unpredictable and when people do get hit in the head with bats and weapons it can be horrific.
I happen to have 2 x kukhris in the house but not explicitly as self defence weapons. I've always thought a paintball gun would be a good deterrent - decent range, non lethal but hurts like hell especially in the face.
What does it matter. The concern is the same whether you live in an inner city shit hole or a 6 bedroom country home with an acre of land around it, you may be the unlucky victim of a burglary.
Of course you are right. My point was that anywhere in the UK is relatively safe.
Bianchi-Boy - MemberOf course you are right. My point was that anywhere in the UK is relatively safe.
Well, the risk of a mobile phone charger exploding and burning the house down is relatively low, but I still unplug all (of my wife's many) chargers before going to bed. The risk of flooding is pretty low but I check the drains are clear. The risk of burglary is statistically pretty low too but any sensible person should lock their doors, add security lights...perhaps an alarm.
The "weapon under the bed scenario" is only relevant if a burglar isn't content to just take your tv and laptop. They decide to get some mobile phones, your wife's jewelry, perhaps those nice watches you have. Are you willing to let someone put you and your family in a ransom situation and hope they'll just leave when they've taken all your stuff? It's even less likely but it's much more serious.
The bat under the bed might never get used, it might be an utterly pointless addition to your home security but a simple stick might also allow you to match the man coming up the stairs and convince him to leave before he subjects your wife and children to a terrifying ordeal.
It's not Surrey round hear. Everyone's got a muppet tenderiser next to the door for dealing with cartoon Rambo's like this.
All that because his wheelie bin was too close to his motorbike.
I've got a 1968 BSA Airsporter (paid about£30 for it new & brought it home on the bus) in the cupboard under the stairs. I could always cock it & pull the trigger but nothing would come out except air.
The pellets are in the garage somewhere.





