I've got 3, need more please.
What cheese do you use to encourage a bear? Camembert.
What cheese can you disguise a horse with? Mascapone.
What does cheese say to itself in the mirror? Halloumi.
Any others? Don't ask why 
Chat Forum
Jokes about cheese please :-)
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Posted 9 months ago #
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese.
Posted 9 months ago # -
How can you joke about cheese?
It's a very serious business.don simon (qualified cheesemaker)
Posted 9 months ago # -
What type of cheese is made backwards?
EDAM.
Posted 9 months ago # -
Gouda been such a good thread this.
Posted 9 months ago # -
what's white and sits in a tree..?
Rupert the fridge..
(not technically a cheese joke but I reckon you could sneak a cheese reference in there without upsetting anyone..)
Posted 9 months ago # -
What cheese to you use to entice a bear down from a mountain? ... Camembert
What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror? ... HalloumiWhat cheese do you use to disguise a horse? ... Mascarpone
How do you handle dangerous cheese? ... Caerphilly
What cheese is made backwards? ... Edam
What cheeses would you eat on a windy day? ... Bries
Can you make cheese without milk? ... No whey!
Posted 9 months ago # -
What cheese was really good at running in the 80s?
Gorgonzola Budd.
Posted 9 months ago # -
I clearly just copied and pasted but who cares!
Posted 9 months ago # -
Familiarity brie-ds contempt.
Posted 9 months ago # -
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese
Posted 9 months ago # -
What's a Pirates favourite cheese?
Chedd-AAAAAARGH
Posted 9 months ago # -
Why did Michael Jackson coat his willy in dairylea? ...because kids will do anything for dairylea ....I'll get my coat.
Posted 9 months ago # -
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese
why the hell didn't I know that saying when I was still young and carefree enough to wield such a poignant gem with aplomb..?
Posted 9 months ago # -
Cheers folks, a couple of new ones there...nice pirate one Shane, how's life with the Jacks?
Posted 9 months ago # -
Cheese jokes, pah! I camembert them.
Posted 9 months ago # -
Some spotty youth threw a block of mild cheese through our lounge window today. I went outside and shouted after him "Well that's not very mature!"
Posted 9 months ago # -
I was walking along the street yesterday when some bloke threw milk and cheese at me. I thought "How dare'ee!"
Posted 9 months ago # -
Jack's ***t! LOL
Posted 9 months ago # -
My Toddlers bike has a tiny edam zip tied to the bars. It's his baby bell.
Posted 9 months ago # -
My Toddlers bike has a tiny edam zip tied to the bars. It's his baby bell.
Can we borrow your small edam for my school nativity play? We need a Little Baby Cheeses
Posted 9 months ago # -
I bought it at a special dairy products market in the middle east called "Cheeses of Nazareth"
Posted 9 months ago # -
There was a young man from Dundalk
Who was marooned for year on a rock
He had nothing to eat
But the corns on his feet
And the cheese that he picked form his xxxx
Posted 9 months ago # -
What's a freedom fighter's favourite cheese?
Che, dur.OK that's bloody awful but it's an original dammit.
Posted 9 months ago # -
How does a pornstar like his cheese?
Blue and veiny.
I've just made that up you know
Posted 9 months ago # -
Dundalk and rock don't rhyme.
Posted 9 months ago # -
It's becoming more obvious to me why most people just repost old jokes
Posted 9 months ago # -
I thought the camembert one was to do with Yogi's little friend BooBoo
Posted 9 months ago # -
I don't know any jokes but cheese based names are
Reg Leicester
Cheddar George
Gordon Zola
Wesley Dale
Phil E Delphia
Cameron BearPosted 9 months ago # -
How do you handle exploding cheese?
Caerphilly.
Posted 9 months ago # -
"One day Jill (a virgin) went to the zoo with Jack. They were walking around, and saw one elephant mounting another. "What are they doing?" asked Jill. "Oh, they're making pizza", Jack said. "Hmm...interesting. Can we make pizza, Jack?" Jack replied, "Not right now Jill".
They keep walking and see two lions having sex. "What are THEY doing Jack?" Jill asked. "Oh, they're making pizza, too", replied Jack. "Hmmm...interesting. Can we make pizza NOW, Jack?" said Jill. "No Jill," Jack answered". "Not right now".
They keep walking and see two monkeys having sex. "Are THEY making pizza, too, Jack?" "Yes, they are making pizza, Jill", answered Jack. Jill then said "Jack...can we PLEASE make pizza NOW? Jack thought about it for a second, and said, "Okay Jill, let's go make pizza".
So Jack and Jill go behind a bush and start getting it on. After a little while, Jill stops and says, "JACK! I think the pizza's ready!!" Jack looked at her and said "How do you know that, Jill?" To which Jill said....
"Because the cheese is running down my leg".
Posted 9 months ago # -
There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France......
All that was left was de brie.Posted 9 months ago #
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