Ton, sorry to read about that. I’d like to reiterate what others have said: do find someone to talk to and if you don’t have someone, do take up the offers here. Don’t hang around, just do it. I do fear that, as others have said, the loss of community makes people feel considerably more vulnerable and there is a lack of peer support.

Last September I set up a dads group when junior started at primary school, because it seemed to me that dads walk in the shadow of the mums during school time. My hope was that dads would have a group to meet up with each month for a beer and some grub and shoot the breeze, have a bit of banter, but also talk about the kid(s) and any issues at school or otherwise. Word has already got around with someone saying they wish they had a dads group.

just logged on anonymously, although I have been a member of Stw for longer that I care to remember, Its heartening to know there are so many others struggling with mental health issues and getting such good advice on here. It seems bewildering the amount of differing advice I have had over the years, I have tried the meds, but none have worked for me, I am currently taking counselling (cbt) and it seems to be helping a bit.
I think its worth mentioning the isolation and loneliness I feel while depressed, I hide it well in my office job but I could be sitting on the moon in my head as I don’t often feel “in the present”.
If you suspect some one isn’t quite 100% I think the best thing you can do is to simply take them out for a walk/ride whatever and talk things through, someone is much more likely to open up and discuss things while actually doing something than being in a social situation.

If you suspect some one isn’t quite 100%

I think the main problem with this is that you usually don’t. The OP (Ton) knew the lad that the initial thread is about. I also knew him in passing at work & I know lots of people that knew him who all agree that there were no indications of any real issues that he had.
Crying shame.

I lost a friend to suicide in 2016.

Incidentally, my next door neighbour (another Ben) lost his best childhood friend around the same time.

He’s in media and spent 18 months working on Steve: A Documentary, which has just been released.

Ben is now touring the UK showing the film and is pretty heavily involved in the male mental health scene.

Do watch it if you’ve contributed to this thread.*

*Disclaimer: I’m on for a split second talking about how biking helps my mental health.

“They don’t listen”

I do.

I am.

I understand people’s good intentions by saying that you should “talk to someone” (as long as it’s not them) or “seek help” (you’re ****)  I’ve asked for help, friends dismissed it and professionals just want to make money out of misery. It left me feeling worse than I did before. I’ve found that I’ve opened up to the wrong people, they’ve either not been able to cope or manipulated me.

So if you are in a position where you are willing to reach out to someone, give them some of your time and ask them if thing’s are ok and then listen, only offer advice if asked. Don’t expect to sort someone’s life out over one pint or bike ride, they may need more time and if you can then give it. You don’t have to be good friends, or even an aquaitence to make a difference, just a decent human being.