Can’t jump for shit, hate really really steep stuff, pretty good at riding round and round for a very long time.

Im amazing at everything… whips, manuals and just popping of stuff. If you are not amazing at this it is because you are weak.

My name is Geex

I suck at riding a lap of Whites and then the Wall at Afan, followed by one of the FoD DH runs with a load of people judging me for style

I’m amazeballs at everything else

I’m not amazeballs at anything. To a pro DHer I’m rubbish. To a leisure cyclist I can ride pretty gnarly stuff. I have a serious mental block with doubles that aren’t tiny and steep tabletops. Not good with exposure or tight turns on very steep trails, too scared of heights. Am best at rough natural trails with lots of pumping, jumping, hopping and dropping to carry speed, or flat turns in filthy conditions.

Bad at jumping ok at everything else. I’ve walked on trails all over the world at some point but hey I’m enjoying myself and as I’m 50 in a few weeks I’m more than happy to be having fun and still loving it.

@Trimix

This is all pretty meaningless without a proper measure

I’ve always been a consummate low level intermediate at most things I’ve done.

This ^^ is me in a nutshell.

Getting better at light DH, jumps and drops. Hate gap jumps but force myself to take them on (smaller ones nothing too gnar!). Really working hard at cornering and berms and seen some recent improvements there. But coming from pond-weed abilities, you can only really improve!

Fitness best it’s been in a very long time, which helps.

Main thing is, despite regularly being last in my category in the local DH races on my humble Boardman, it’s by tenths of seconds (I console myself that I’m not too far off the pace!) and I thoroughly enjoy myself.

That’s what it’s all about for me, the fun.

I blather on about this at length in the current issue – I like to think I’m handy on north Lakes tech, but put me in the rooty slop of Grisedale and I feel like an absolute beginner again. Can’t jump for toffee either.

I suspect I have the least technical ability of anyone who posts on here!

I’ve never been particularly great but getting back into mountain biking after a few years mostly road riding and even the few technical skills I used to have are now gone.

I’m amazing at avoiding riding my bike if it’s rained anytime in the last week, if I know there’s going to be any mud anywhere or if it looks like it might rain.

To be fair, when I was racing XC, I used to be OK (nothing amazing by any means but I’ve got a couple of wins in Sport and a few top 20% of field in Expert). Technical ability – I remember doing a skills session at Sherwood Pines and coming away from it SO much better and more confident, that stayed with me for about a year of racing before I went back to my old ways.

I do so little MTB now that I’m dreadful. Was talking to a mate a couple of weeks ago about some riding in Spain and the Alps we’d both done and he was saying about some of the stuff he’d seen me ride. I pointed out that if I tried any of that now, I’d end up on the deck before I could even think that it was a bad idea!

Amazeballs at steep techy trails where pedaling is not required

Suck at climbing or and any other time pedaling is required

I’m a thoroughly average weekend warrior. I’ve done some races (XC and Enduro) and not died or came last, but I’m not fit enough for the first one and not good enough for the second one.

I can generally find decent speed on stuff I’ve ridden a few times that isn’t too techincal, but I’m rubbish at riding stuff blind.

I suck at wet roots, which isn’t ideal living in the West of Scotland.

I’m a passable mechanic.

I’m technically decent but too conservative (small c!) to be really good, I very much don’t want to break any bones so I don’t go really fast.

I’m also fairly fit but too fat to be actually fast.

I’ve got good endurance and aptitude for ultra endeavours but because of the fatness it takes me too long to put in any good times on ITTs

So all of this means I’m nothing but mediocrity and un-realised potential.

I’m good at riding steadily for a relatively long time, fairly good at riding up hills, very good at reading a map and going exploring new stuff.

I’m rubbish at jumping, though I have acknowledged and partially worked on that. Booked a coaching day last year and am now at the point of coping/not crapping myself on jumps and actually going looking for little drops or bits to pop off.

I’m terrible at manuals and bunnyhops, which I intended to work on during lockdown and have done nothing about, because I’ve spent as much of it as possible riding steadily, often uphill, while reading a map and exploring new stuff.

I am pretty good at reading and watching How To… articles and videos, but my real super power is forgetting everything I have read and watched.

I have an uncanny ability to topple off my bike when setting off on any terrain; it really has to be seen to be believed.

I’m poop at everything else, but it makes my mate laugh, so that’s okay 🙂

Amazeballs – talking the talk.

Rubbish – walking the walk.

Or, more accurately, pushing uphill.

Good:
Riding easy off road downhills at speed. On road, descending is my favourite thing.
A healthy approach to fear, mixed with a love of speed.
It’s the only thing I can do well.

Not giving up.

Bad:
Pretty much everything else.

Bikes are ace.

I am naturally amazing at pretty much everything. Anyone who has ridden with me will testify to that*

* not really the biggest complaint i get is that im too noisy screaming while out of my depth on anything steeper than a kerb. aparently people use me as a guide as to whats coming up further down the trail 🙂

Mountain biking is a progressive sport (mainly)

Genuine Q – what does this mean, that it’s about skills progression similar to the way BMX is?

Suck at jumps now. I used do jumps at a basic level, modest sets of doubles or the big rollers on a 4X track. Never got to the stage where I’d take the biggest lines there though, never felt totally relaxed (as you should) on that stuff really. Got out of that habit almost 20 years ago. Now just remember how to weight the bike to help with XC flow, seem to have ‘micro-tech’ skills left from those days, I can hop rooty bits at speed, pre-jump a slope to get speed from a trail etc or ride smooth.
I’m fairly confident on steep natural stuff but would have a wake-up call in BC I’m sure.

Tricks and stunts, a bit crap really. Ok on drops, unless I get the fear or riding tired or just not feeling it
Racing (enduro), mostly mid pack in age group with a few near the back and a few nearer the pointy end, getting less and less common as I get nearer the older end of the Vets.

Hmmm. Technically I’m okay, with a small ‘o’ I can jump, I can drop, I can turn, I can even turn while jumping a little bit.

I can ride DH a little bit, I even raced a couple of times a LONG time ago, my MTB ‘Scout Badges’ include, countless Alps trips, Whistler Bike Park, Snowden, pretty much every trail centre in Wales, according to Strava I’m even a top 10% (sometimes as low as 6%)on some descents.

I suck at confidence, show me an (ideally) manicured TC trail I know like the back of my hand and I’m verging on the cocky, I can throw the bike around with the best of them, cheeky ‘French’ lines, yeah no problem, but take me out of my comfort zone and I’m terrified, hell even trails I know well, add in a bit of mud, an unusually loose surface or a new section that’s a bit steep and I go to pieces. The grips get squeezed, the brakes jabbed at, the saddle jammed between my knees, I’m a 15 year veteran with all the skill and grace of a Noob on his first wobble around the park on his BSO.

The saddest part is I can’t be content with staying in my little comfort bubble, I hate it because on those rare occasions (getting rarer) when the anxiety doesn’t come, I genuinely, honestly think I’m amazing, not as in “I could race world cups me” but the effortless way I move at one with my bike, I’m the sort of rider I’d love to be.

I’m also really fat, there is that too.

Genuine Q – what does this mean, that it’s about skills progression similar to the way BMX is?

I suppose you could say its progressed in the sense that watching something like Sprung or even early Earthed videos is often now little better than watching your competent mate.

Whereas watching newer stuff is almost a different sport to what we do at the weekends!

15 years ago no one backflipped an MTB, now its almost a staple trick (for those that can jump properly rather than us softcore trail wobblers).

Im amazing at everything… whips, manuals and just popping of stuff. If you are not amazing at this it is because you are weak.

My name is Geex

Have you ever ridden with Geex?
As annoying as it is for some people on here he’s pretty handy on a bike.

My perception of myself as a rider has been “average”, from when I was objectively “terrible” through to becoming “competent” and eventually “quite good sometimes”.

The me of 15 years ago would consider me now very skilled, but the bar is always rising and my peer group always includes better riders. So I'[m still “average”

I’m decent on gnarly fixed rock though – and learning to ride in the home counties means I’m able to get speed out of a flatter trail.

Somewhere between a noob and riding god…

Happy to fit a trail gap of up to 15ft gap jump and hit 25ft tables.
Prefer technical single track style riding. If you go on starva times i’m top 10 on local trails and mid pack on trail centres and riding Mecca’s like Surrey hills or Peak District.

Have you ever ridden with Geex?
As annoying as it is for some people on here he’s pretty handy on a bike.

Yeah, I often discuss this with one of my mates/other Dads…
We got left behind and when the kids are riding with pro’s it’s like a different world and we feel crap. Watching the pro’s you see them do what seems impossible without even paying attention.

Then we go somewhere else and see loads of people we are just as much better than and realise what we are doing seems just as impossible to them.

Not ridden with Geex (to my knowledge) but I’d truly expect to just be gobsmacked.

Have you ever ridden with Geex?

Nope. But i expect he is awesome. He told us of this fact on a very regular basis.

Everyone on this thread is being modest and it is thus missing his ego, so i thought i’d bring him in by proxy.

I’m great at planning rides but crap at actually going on them.

We got left behind and when the kids are riding with pro’s it’s like a different world and we feel crap. Watching the pro’s you see them do what seems impossible without even paying attention.

Haha – and this is why I go to hotspots like Rogate in the middle of the week.

We got left behind and when the kids are riding with pro’s it’s like a different world and we feel crap. Watching the pro’s you see them do what seems impossible without even paying attention.

Then we go somewhere else and see loads of people we are just as much better than and realise what we are doing seems just as impossible to them.

I agree with this.
The first time I rode at the ISDE (world team champs) I though I was the bollocks before the event. I had my arse handed to me on a plate and almost didn’t even finish the first day.
Yet UK events I could run rings round all but a handfull of people.
But it inspired me to get better/faster/stronger and eventually do OK at international events.

It’s all relative. I’m no longer bothered about being “fast” and have fun with people better/worse riders than me on almost every group ride I do.
Love getting dragged on by more skilful folks.
Love seeing people trying stuff they’ve never ridden before.

Suck: Jumps. Wasn’t interested in it when I was getting into riding, now it won’t take. I can do jumping on trails to clear stuff etc, it’s just built jumps I’m hopeless at, especially if I can’t see the landing (which I guess is another way of saying if it’s any bigger than tiny)

Amazeballs: Braking. No seriously, if there’s any grip to be found on the brakes, I can find it, even on the steepest and nastiest of surfaces. Sometimes it’s really useful, mostly I use it for cowardly slowing down when I don’t need to, but I’m still claiming it as it’s something most folks can’t do.

(overall: Andy Barlow called me competent once. I wish I’d got him to write it down)

I suppose you could say its progressed in the sense that watching something like Sprung or even early Earthed videos is often now little better than watching your competent mate.

Whereas watching newer stuff is almost a different sport to what we do at the weekends!

I know what you mean. As long as no-one expects me to keep up in that area : )

Love getting dragged on by more skilful folks.
Love seeing people trying stuff they’ve never ridden before.

– and that’s what drives it, there’s not much better than that feeling.

I used to suck at everything so i purchased a modern gnarpoon,now i still suck but with a longer bike.

This thread is so reassuring, I thought it was just me that was no good at jumps (the last one was 6 weeks ago and resulted in me hurtling into a gorse bush and cracking a rib).

I have since sold that bike in disgust – clearly not my fault.

Oh yeah, isaid you can only have one Suck & one Amazeballs, but i’m breaking my own rule and adding “steep,slippy or off camber, non bermed downhill turns” to my “suck” section.

I’d just fogotten how bad i am at these, but i keep grabbing the front brake in a panic and then wondering where my bike has gone as i slide down the slope on my ass…… 😉

I have since sold that bike in disgust – clearly not my fault.

Ha ha. I have a mate who’s a bit like that. Everything is always his bikes fault.