I can’t be the only person who hasn’t seen and will never see a single second of Love Island??

100% no (flame me now 😋). I’m with you there. (Another flaming???)

“Boots on the ground.”

What, are you going to fly over in a helicopter and throw footwear at the enemy? I think you mean, “Soldiers on the ground.”

Ah, but that’s a perfect example of a synecdoche. A “figure of speech in which a part is made to represent the whole or vice versa”. I love ’em me.

“Going forward”. Entirely unnecessary unless they’ve found a way to change things that have already happened.

“Go ahead and…”

I was watching a training video last week. “So I’m just going to go ahead and do this, then you can go ahead and do that, and while I’m waiting for you to finish I’m going to go ahead and…” What, other directions are available? ‘I’m going to turn left and download the installer, then third exit off the roundabout just past the Rose & Crown I’ll click Setup and then proceed in a direction I believe to be North…’

Verbal ‘filler’ tics in language generally. I’m probably as guilty as anyone, but OBVIOUSLY it’s far more annoying when someone else does it. 😁

“Boots on the ground.”

What, are you going to fly over in a helicopter and throw footwear at the enemy? I think you mean, “Soldiers on the ground.”

Ah, but that’s a perfect example of a synecdoche. A “figure of speech in which a part is made to represent the whole or vice versa”. I love ’em me.

It’s not incorrect though, is it. The soldiers aren’t on the ground, the soles of their boots are.

Qualifying the word ‘unique’, as in ‘my bike is quite unique’. It’s either unique or it isn’t, there’s no in-between stage!

I can’t be the only person who hasn’t seen and will never see a single second of Love Island??

Me either although the ITV Hub keeps trying to foist it on me whenever I open it to watch the TdF highlights.

Qualifying the word ‘unique’,

Weirdly, my wife, who’s a professor of English at a Russel Group university, doesn’t mind qualifiers on absolute adjectives “almost never” “most delicious ” etc etc. But then she is Canadian, so you know; I’ll reserve judgement.

“don’t be a dick” and “rule 1” I dislike as both equate to “do what appears reasonable to me”.

my wife, who’s a professor of English at a Russel Group university

Boom!

doesn’t mind qualifiers on absolute adjectives “almost never” “most delicious

As in language is about communication more than nitpicking that gets in the way of communication?

That said, I dislike when people confuse use of “I” and “me”: “me and my wife went to town”. I hear this as “me… went to town”. Attractively caveperson I guess.

“We won” or “We lost”

When referring to a football team when they did not participate in the match.

Weirdly, my wife, who’s a professor of English at a Russel Group university, doesn’t mind qualifiers on absolute adjectives “almost never” “most delicious ” etc etc.

Haha owned. And the examples you’ve put above don’t bother me at all, so no clue why the one I mentioned winds me up.

As in language is about communication more than nitpicking that gets in the way of communication?

Lies.

That said, I dislike when people confuse use of “I” and “me”:

I’m pretty relaxed about most grammar and spoken conventions, but referring to anyone in the third person pronoun (so beloved of call centre workers) vis “Is the policy suitable for yourself”  ought to be punishable by public flogging.

Colourway

It’s just a colour or colours

Colourway is a necessary word. It doesn’t describe a colour or replace the word colour, it defines the colours which make up a product (which may of course be a single colour, but may be multiple colours, or even the same colours but in a different pattern).

So the RED colourway may not be all red, and other products that are mainly red too will have a different colourway name to differentiate them.

Sorry – spot the (ex) clothing buyer.

Pain Cave is one that I won’t use – it’s just a garage / shed / spare room with a turbo trainer and a rusty barbell.

I make signs and vehicle graphics for a living. It’s trailing off a bit now but there was tendency for trades people to want to add “bespoke” & “solutions” to everything.
“Bespoke decorating solutions” wtf. You’re a painter and decorator!
Trying to make what you do sound like an M&S food advert!🤣

Pain Cave is one that I won’t use – it’s just a garage / shed

Wattage cottage?

Myself has replaced I and me in lots of situations and it does my head in. It just makes the person speaking or typing seem like an idiot.

Weirdly, my wife, who’s a professor of English at a Russel Group university, doesn’t mind qualifiers on absolute adjectives “almost never” “most delicious ” etc etc.

“Almost never” seems reasonable? Zero is an absolute* but ‘close to zero’ is perfectly cromulent.

(* – and pretty cold)

Get in the sea.

Qualifying the word ‘unique’, as in ‘my bike is quite unique’. It’s either unique or it isn’t, there’s no in-between stage

See also: “one of the only…”
.
.
And when, in the context of television programmes, did series become season?

American jumbled up date formats, and the way they are articulated… and following on from that, british people adopting them…

It’s not July four, it’s the fourth of July.

And when, in the context of television programmes, did series become season?

I think thats another ‘Americanism’ Might be wrong but I think it’s to do with a lot of actors taking a hiatus at certain points over the year, possibly something to to with the actors guild or unions or something.

So they can only produce a new series when the actors are in season. ooh err.

Love Island is a telly programme that will never be shown in our house. What a load of drivel (having accidentally seen a clip during Le tour France highlights).

Going on a journey, without leaving the room
Grrrr

Essentially..

American jumbled up date formats, and the way they are articulated… and following on from that, british people adopting them…

The Americans actually have the right idea, it’s just that the year is in the wrong place. If you specified the time as min-sec-hour it’s not the minutes and seconds that are the wrong way round.

(Not really a phrase though.)

It’s not July four, it’s the fourth of July.

Which is weird in itself isn’t it? The US itself doesn’t celebrate “July Four Day.”

All football conversations where fans seem to think they own the club and have some form of right to suggest how they are run. Don’t they realise they are just cash cows to be milked by entertainment companies

‘Part out’ is a perfectly legitimate phrase used in agriculture. When handling/separating livestock you commonly use a parting gate (a gate parallel to the race which hinges at the rear) to direct livestock down one of a number of routes. Hence you would ‘part out’ a particular group of animals to be penned or processed differently.

Smash it
You smashed it
BTW

acoustic bikes

git gud (a form of mickey taking in gaming for people who aren’t as good at games as others).

git gud (a form of mickey taking in gaming for people who aren’t as good at games as others).

L2P nub

Moar pew pew less QQ

“waves fist at cougar” ;-p

Over use of the word ‘Sick’ especially in interviews with DH racers. Just stop it!

“Does my bum look big in this”. :O)

For anyone who has watched an American/Discovery channel car show …..”it’s the holy grail of Mustang/Barn Find etc etc etc”

French press.

“Almost never” seems reasonable? Zero is an absolute* but ‘close to zero’ is perfectly cromulent.

Yes, they do. Through continued use i think. “Nearly impossible” is another one. There’s a word for that etc etc…

‘From the Get Go’…….urgh!

Over use of the word ‘Sick’ especially in interviews with DH racers. Just stop it!

Roadies do it too but with the word “super”. Try listening to any TdF interview.

Yes I was super happy with the way the team performed and obviously we knew today was going to be super hard, super hot so yes we were super well prepared. And to win the stage as well – I was super surprised at that!

” I saw it with my own eyes…”
Is there another way?