Are they actually ‘food’? Do they contain any nutrients or calories of any type?

Does your body absorb them in any way? Other than the nuclear orange stuff that it leaves all over your fingers, which is then absorbed though your skin? And the yummy taste of pretend-cheesy goodness, obviously ?

Thats more than one question, I know. But I just fancied getting the lowdown as I contemplate my 3rd bag. Not that its likely to effect the outcome.

Anyone shed any light on this? Or Quavers?

They’re in a special food group all of their own, and therefore don’t count toward any RDAs or anything. FACT.

binners – Member
Are they actually ‘food’?

I certainly hope not.

Try quavers and wotsits together. Especially one of those curled up quavers with a wotsit shoved in it. Awesome.

Edit. I’ve just read that back and it sounds a bit wrong. But then this is stw…

They they are food
They contain maize
Vegetable fat
Cheese powder
Natural colours

But you will turn orange if you eat too many.
That is the issue in Essex , where it is the only food available

Can’t say about calories, but Wotsits are epic when sprinkled on tinned soup. Especially cream of tomato imo.

Try quavers and wotsits together

Washed down with Sunny D 😀

I’ve been eating every day as one of my ‘five a day’, based on the fact they’re the same colour as carrots.

Dagnamit now I want wotsits and quavers and the philistines don’t sell them over here!

one_happy_hippy – Member
Try quavers and wotsits together. Especially one of those curled up quavers with a wotsit shoved in it. Awesome.

I’ve not tried that, though I will do shortly. But in the same way a Roast Beef Monster Munch can contain within its central hole 3 or 4 Worcester Sauce flavour French Fries. Give that one a go!

Any more non-food, mixed crisp (type substance) , dream combinations I should try?

They are food and they are amazing. Might be a bit lacking in dietry fibre though. Here’s a video on cheese powder:

Not very natural

Is it wrong to prefer M&S cheesy puffs? They are soooo orange and soooo cheesy…

Is it wrong to prefer M&S cheesy puffs?

No, quite partial to a few bags myself.

Take a processed cheese slice and roll it round some wotsits, so you end up with a cheesy tube of goodness 🙂

No flourescent orange maize based snack can ever be bad. And foot flaps, I shall be noting your rather sharp observation of their resemblance to carrots, as validation of my dietary choices in future 😀

Cheesy wotits mayo white bread margarine

* hungry*

Double dagnamit. Can stw organise me a care package of wotsits, quavers and roast beef monster munch please?

Cheesy Wotsits, Quavers and roast beef Monster Munch are on offer in Spar at a squid for 6 packets at the moment. God bless their benevolence!

Which is actually what lead to the initial question. So for 3 quid you’ve got a maize-based nirvana that could potentially last up to 36 hours

I remember watching a programme presented by that Robert Winston guy, y’know the one, looks like a living Groucho mask.

Anyway, there was a feature on a woman with such extreme food phobias, that she lived solely on roast beef-flavoured Monster Munch. She filled suitcases with it when she went abroad.

The point was to illustrate that the human body can carry on for a very long time, provided that it gets the requisite number of calories. As you might imagine, she didn’t look the picture of health.

Cheese and onion Squares, I could understand…

My niece went orange as a baby when she had a bunch of food allergies and could only eat carrots.

I know this sounds odd but one of the greatest, and perhaps oddest food combo’s was discovered by an ex colleague of mine. I’m not sure what his mental state was at the time but he came up with what’s best described as a crisp / sweet canape.

A red (it has to be red) Midget Gem atop a salt ‘n’ vinegar square crisp.

Place in mouth and experience the legal high of conflicting tastes and textures that tease, caress, confuse and excite the tongue.

Awesome times.

Midget gem = hardened vomit on a biscuit. YEEEUUUUCK

Wotsits, with a side of Bernard Matthews American Fried chicken on warburtons supertoasty dripping in mayo. That’s how I got so fat at sixth form. That and beer anyway.

Midget gem = hardened vomit on a biscuit. YEEEUUUUCK

Ahhh, I think that’s an Iced Gem you’re thinking of there.

Midget Gems are like stunted, underachieving wine gums.

Sorry I heard gem and gagged, iced gems are the evil ones. Horrid.
I can see now, a wine gum on a salt n vinegar crisp, sounds good.

Ice gems? My kids won’t even eat those things. Mankind has managed to create a sugary confection that even they turn their noses up at. If I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes, I’d never have believed it possible

Any more non-food, mixed crisp (type substance) , dream combinations I should try

Just as bacon and cheese are such willing bedfellows, a frazzle-wotsit mouthful is a true example of synergy in action.

Pretzels + Nutella
Sorry about the lack of maize in this post

Echoing Emsz comment earlier but my own delectable delight is Flaming Hot Monster Munch and mint mayo sandwich. Obviously that’s gods own white bread!

Bugles. for that nostalgia kick.

I believe iced gems are a by-product of gypsum manufacture.

yes I can only apologise again, I find them so abhorrent that the word gem normally sticks in my throat, please do try and move on from my dreadful faux pas..

They’re mostly air. Isn’t it more like breathing than eating?

The answer to any question about Wotsits is M&S Cheese Tasters.

Thread closed

Any more non-food, mixed crisp (type substance) , dream combinations I should try?

Crispy on the outside OK ?
Minstrels and Skittles is good (1:2 or 3 or ideally 2:5)

Do twiglets count? Pour some full-fat coke in your mouth while you’re still crunching them up. (KP Skips however should be held on the tongue and allowed to fizz and dissolve).

Ginger kids from non ginger parents are down to pregnant women eating wotsits and drinking irn bru.

Fact.

Nice “n” Spicy Nik Naks add a delicious and satisfying crunch to most sandwiches.

Mouth full of wotsits, can of ben shaws lemonade, combine orally and allow to marinade. It’s like eating delicious vomit.

Ginger kids from non ginger parents are down to pregnant women eating wotsits and drinking irn bru.

Fact.

A ginger kid I went to school with committed suicide because all his uni mates took the piss too much.