Fill the stanchions on his Bombers with frozen sausages

Bum his dog IN his hot tub.

TBH that sounds quite a lot more petty than somebody moving something that was put over their property line without their permission, then repeated moved back over their property line without speaking to them.

Well, as far as I can see from the photo, the actual mounting is not on the bloke’s side of the property line, and if the set-up is anything like mine, ie an inverted ‘U’-shaped tube held in place by four bolts, and the dish the same, it means 180 degrees of horizontal adjustment, so my suggestion is perfectly valid, and exactly what a competent installer would do – no need to re-drill and re-fit elsewhere, just swing the dish to the left, away from the property line, then swivel the dish back to align with the satellite.
He will have no argument about the edge of the dish overlapping his property line, which is just petty, and if it intruding into his line of sight on one side, tough. From what I can see, it could go further to the right without causing an issue with the dish being swivelled around anyway.

Just go nuclear and fill his entire house with sausages.

It’s the only way to be sure.

CountZero
Member

TBH that sounds quite a lot more petty than somebody moving something that was put over their property line without their permission, then repeated moved back over their property line without speaking to them.

Well, as far as I can see from the photo, the actual mounting is not on the bloke’s side of the property line, and if the set-up is anything like mine, ie an inverted ‘U’-shaped tube held in place by four bolts, and the dish the same, it means 180 degrees of horizontal adjustment, so my suggestion is perfectly valid, and exactly what a competent installer would do – no need to re-drill and re-fit elsewhere, just swing the dish to the left, away from the property line, then swivel the dish back to align with the satellite.

Maybe so but you weren’t suggesting it for that reason, but to annoy him. He didn’t do anything wrong in the first place!

Is it a sausage dog?

Flyingpotatoes’ Neighbour is Steve McNeil who wants everyone to watch in 8 bit.

Has anyone peed in the neighbours shoes and on his sausage yet?

Bum his wife with a sausage dog.

Bum his sausage dog with his wife

Just been reading the responses and I’ve nearly ruined my keyboard laughing at some of them so thanks for cheering me up.

I’m waiting for sky to move the dish as they are the ones who put it there. After shoving a letter through his door asking him not to move the dish as I’ve arranged sky to relocate it, he hasn’t touched this dish for a couple of days now, so at least my mother can watch some tv.

Anyway I’ve just found out the neighbour has a cat!

So would you still use sausages for a cat?

So would you still use sausages for a cat?

No.

For a cat you need a cycle helmet, and emergency union flag and a tub of Sudocrem.

Every week replace his cat with an identically marked but slightly smaller cat until one day just don’t replace the cat. When he asks about the missing cat pretend he never had a cat.

a drone, a tin of emulsion with a hole poked in the bottom, fly over solar panels

Shit in his hot tub.

Every week replace his cat with an identically marked but slightly smaller cat until one day just don’t replace the cat. When he asks about the missing cat pretend he never had a cat.

Or tempt the cat in with tasty treats once a week, tumble dry it to shrink it slightly, then send it back.

Picolax the cat.

Hammer frozen sausgages into his pussy.

He didn’t do anything wrong in the first place!

He acted the **** with an elderly woman rather than talking to her like a grown adult. He needs knocking out of **** alignment himself.

So would you still use sausages for a cat?

Freeze the cat and hammer it into the dog’s bum.

Freeze his hot tub and use your hot air balloon to drop it on his solar panels.

After shoving a letter through his door

Get Steve to ease his sausage into the letterbox using a spoon

Slip a frozen sausage through his letterbox and shout ‘oh er mrs the aliens are coming!’.

This place used to be so simple – piss in shoes, own with Bombers, shit down chimneys.

I knew where I was in the old days. Usually on someone’s roof…….

When the sky man takes the dish down to move it, take it and shove it in your neighbours’ tea towel holder and then subscribe to BT

This place used to be so simple – piss in shoes, own with Bombers, shit down chimneys.

Or cover the cat in sudocrem?

Report him for having solar panels with out building control approval. Give him some pointless paper work to fill in.

There are so many knobs in this country who think “my house is my castle” and then buy semi detached house.

For a cat you will need either:

A hungry boa constrictor

or

A husky.

Option 2 will be messy and you may need to schedule a dog groomer to clean the dog.

Usually on someone’s roof…….

…clutching your binoculars whilst evading the police?

Report him for having solar panels with out building control approval. Give him some pointless paper work to fill in.

report his hot tub as an unlicensed sewage processing plant

sign him up for a free catalogue through the post from every sex toy shop you can find

reverse the connection on his solar panels so when the sun comes out he has to pay for the privilege of it shining on his roof

Usually on someone’s roof…….

He was in the apprentice Santa Claus programme.
It was going really well until he started losing his hair

Take off and nuke the site from orbit.

Although a noble solution and one I’d otherwise heartily agree with, owing to the semi-detached nature of the properties, you may find that has a somewhat detrimental effect on the state of flyingpotatoes’ mum’s health.

Cougar

He acted the **** with an elderly woman rather than talking to her like a grown adult. He needs knocking out of **** alignment himself.

Unlike the OP who set up a hidden camera rather than talking to the neighbour like a grown adult…?

Perhaps my view is tainted, as I live in a semi-detached house with a pain in the arse neighbour. In fact they put an aerial and Sky dish up on my chimney without asking.

If any of the other neighbours put something on my property, I’d speak to them and assume it was a mistake. If my direct neighbour did it, I’d hoof it straight back over their fence. I’d sooner shit in my hands and clap than speak to them.

rather than talking to the neighbour like a grown adult…?

I’d sooner shit in my hands and clap than speak to them.

So the OP should have spoken to his neighbour but you wouldn’t speak to yours?

Unlike the OP who set up a hidden camera rather than talking to the neighbour like a grown adult…?

The alternative being to baselessly accuse them of tampering with it? The camera was put in to try and find out who / what was causing it to move.

Cougar

The alternative being to baselessly accuse them of tampering with it? The camera was put in to try and find out who / what was causing it to move.

No need to accuse, you just say “excuse me, my mum’s satellite dish keeps getting moved, I wondered if you knew what was going on?”

So the OP should have spoken to his neighbour but you wouldn’t speak to yours?

Nope, already have many times, not wasting my time doing it again. And that you made that assumption is the point really, the neighbour may have had a valid reason not to want to talk to OPs mum (or he may simply be an arse), however we don’t have his side of the story.

reverse the connection on his solar panels so when the sun comes out he has to pay for the privilege of it shining on his roof

This thread is my current favourite. So many superb suggestions for vengeance! But this from @mrmonkfinger has made me laugh the most so far.

Thank you!

Hey Retro83 – I’ve got a hot air balloon I’m looking to offload if any use?
RM.

Unlike the OP who set up a hidden camera rather than talking to the neighbour like a grown adult…?

Why would the OP think it was the neighbour? “Excuse me, mate – you haven’t been leaning out of your bedroom window and poking me mum’s dish, have you?”

It’s not like the neighbour was polite enough to knock on the door in the first place….