• This topic has 149 replies, 70 voices, and was last updated 4 years ago by Houns.
Viewing 40 posts - 41 through 80 (of 150 total)
  • Neighbour moving satellite dish on purpose
  • martinhutch
    Full Member

    I’d rather pop his crappy inflatable hot tub he has in his garden.

    136stu
    Free Member

    It looks well over the “invisible “ line so Sky guy is at fault. However, neighbour is an asshat for not just mentioning it. Suggest you p*ss in his shoes.

    jekkyl
    Full Member

    Bum his hot tub.

    teethgrinder
    Full Member

    Crossbow?

    dangeourbrain
    Free Member

    Move dish. Plant leylandii

    brownsauce
    Free Member

    You dont need a sky engineer to move that dish , any tradesman with a set of ladders and an sds drill could relocate the 4 masonry bolts holding it up if you want it done sooner.

    But yeah neighbour is a petty spiteful knob for moving it

    funkmasterp
    Full Member

    Hammer sausages in to his hot tub

    dangeourbrain
    Free Member

    that dish , any tradesman with a set of ladders and an sds drill could relocate the 4 masonry bolts holding it up if you want it done sooner.

    Do you reckon they should move it 6″ to the left..?

    CountZero
    Full Member

    How unbelievably petty! I’d arrange for the mounting arm to be swung around to stick further out from the wall, with the dish re-aligned to pick up a signal. That way it would be away from the property line, but would intrude further into his line of vision.
    That might teach the stupid s.o.b that being petty about something that isn’t important can have unintended consequences.

    mrlebowski
    Free Member

    Cough on his dog.

    Get the dog to bum him.

    P1ss in his hot tub.

    Go home & have a sausage sarnie.

    timbo46
    Free Member

    Move it yourself or get someone in to do it, as brownsauce says, only 4 bolts and there is plenty of space and a clear view of the sky below your mums window, no need for it to be within reach of the git next door:)

    retro83
    Free Member

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    CountZero
    Member

    How unbelievably petty! I’d arrange for the mounting arm to be swung around to stick further out from the wall, with the dish re-aligned to pick up a signal. That way it would be away from the property line, but would intrude further into his line of vision.
    That might teach the stupid s.o.b that being petty about something that isn’t important can have unintended consequences.

    TBH that sounds quite a lot more petty than somebody moving something that was put over their property line without their permission, then repeated moved back over their property line without speaking to them.

    Scapegoat
    Full Member

    Don’t think he has a dog though.

    Buy him one

    Then bum it.

    Sandwich
    Full Member

    Piranha in the hot tub? Lose weight the quick way.

    singletrackmind
    Full Member

    How abour i send you a 25kg bag of malted barley
    Sow it every day on the solat panels
    Within a week the local feral pigeons will move on in. Thry will build a big old nest and crap all over his panel’s
    Might be a bit noisy but if your mum is like my mum she won’t hear them anymore

    136stu
    Free Member

    Cheapest solution – collect some dog urine and burn a message into his lawn.

    funkmasterp
    Full Member

    Replace the sky dish with one of these (the dish, not the other one from Wayne’s World).

    and glue his dog to it (after you’ve bought him one)

    jekkyl
    Full Member

    Bum his lawn then own his hottub with bombers.

    ell_tell
    Free Member

    Make him a sausage sandwich. But use vegan sausages and don’t tell him.

    jamesco
    Full Member

    God forbid the poor baztid should in the future want a sky dish in that same area ….. just sayin

    Flaperon
    Full Member

    Wait a couple of weeks until coronavirus really kicks in and there are no police, then nip round and do whatever you want.

    Cougar
    Full Member

    What CZ said.

    jamj1974
    Full Member

    Climb on his roof and kick his aerial, worked for Rod Hull or emu.

    🤣🤣🤣

    So, he hasn’t got a dog eh…

    Even better! Get your dog to bum the neighbour with the sausage.

    TomB
    Full Member

    In glum times, this is vintage STW- thanks for the Sunday evening smiles everyone.

    oreetmon
    Free Member

    just tighten the bolts to the max.

    bsims
    Free Member

    Hammer frozen dogs into his windows so they can’t be opened. Dachshunds are bred specifically for this type of situation.

    Edit – into the frames not the panes, that would be ridiculous.

    mrmonkfinger
    Free Member

    Poke a burning sausage through the letterbox.
    Fire some fresh dog turds into the hot tub.
    Fill his gutters with leaf mulch.

    On a serious note, sky should reposition the dish for free, other tradesmen may not be as cheap.

    Ours (dish, not tradesman) is stuck up on a mast, so it is above any and all windows.

    FuzzyWuzzy
    Full Member

    Shitty thing for your neighbour to be doing but also stupid of Sky to position it like that

    DaveyBoyWonder
    Free Member

    A full day has elapsed and no mention of Bombers as far as I can see. STW really is going downhill…

    kayak23
    Full Member

    Fill his hot air balloon up with sausages.

    bsims
    Free Member

    A full day has elapsed and no mention of Bombers as far as I can see. STW really is going downhill…

    You are correct.

    Jam up his sausage machine with bombers
    Smear sausage meat on his bomber stanchions
    Bum his dog with bombers
    Clean your bombers with his dog
    Hammer bombers into his lawn
    Hide his bombers in your hot tub

    PiknMix
    Free Member

    ^ Did it way better. Bravo.

    mrmonkfinger
    Free Member

    sausages are the new bombers

    40mpg
    Full Member

    Fire frozen sausages of wee into his hot tub with your homemade crossbow fabricated from a pair of old bombers and your mums knicker elastic

    Cougar
    Full Member

    Assuming his mum wears… erm, never mind.

    scaredypants
    Full Member

    In defence of “stw”, jekkyl bwned the thread yesterday:

    jekkyl
    Subscriber
    Bum his lawn then own his hottub with bombers.
    Posted 19 hours ago

    Harry_the_Spider
    Full Member

    Sausages are the new Bombers.

    I’d still punch him in the mouth though.

    chestercopperpot
    Free Member

    Move to Spain “the people are so nice there” you don’t even have to bother learning the language everyone speaks English anyway.

    tjagain
    Full Member

    Just as a point the alignment of a dish is easy to do if you move it yourself to a better spot. One of my old tenants had a dish that the builders took down. I put it back up and got it working fine. the vertical angle is already set on the mount, the direction you can get as a compass bearing – that allows you to get a signal and then the TV will monitor the level of signal to allow you to fine tune it by moving it tiny amounts. worked for me.

    eddiebaby
    Free Member

    Previous neighbours kids had an inflatable hot tub and had parties until the early hours. A bucket of crayfish lobbed over the fence sorted that out.

Viewing 40 posts - 41 through 80 (of 150 total)

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