More Bikemonger stickers…. what have you got in your head?

Blimey this comes round quicker every time. We must have put 50,000 stickers out there now.

Running low on stickers, so what do you kids wanna see stuck to the dandy horses this season?

Is there anything you want to see back in the sticky mix..? ones we stopped doing because I grew a little lump of self-conscience and had mothers glare at me when their child read a “If I was a trucker I would crush you and your ****ing car”.

So what you got???
Prizes for the best and stickers for one and all.

x=n+1 where n is the number of gears you currently have

Bit roadie-esque maybe?

Faster than doped beef

Lance stole my other spockets

gears make baby jesus cry

Pass the chainwhip, time to change gear

Every time you change gear a kitten dies

I never got any stickers either of the times sent my details before. 🙁

I never got any stickers either of the times sent my details before.

catchy, I like it

Can I have two stickers for my bike, both of which say – “This sticker should have been sent to Grum”

– Singlespeed: Cos gearing ratios are too complicated for my tiny mind.

– Fixies: How can the people in Shoreditch be wrong?

loads of gears, no idea

“what he said”

“my gear’s bigger than yours”

“I wish my gear was this dirty”

“one gear, one braincell”

“I ride singlespeed because I lack opposable thumbs”

“Freddie Starr ate my other gears”

“Sheldon who?”

“insert niche and semi-witty but ultimately only amusing to the terminally geeky comment here”

That last one might be a bit long for a sticker…

😉

I Spin therefore I Win

Its not about the bike (its about the dealer)

Charliethebikemonger tweaked my nipples and fettled my rim

how’s about the cyclist’s* creed?

“this is my bike, there are many like it, but this one is mine.
my bike is my best friend. it is my life. I must master it as I must master my life.
my bike, without me, is useless. without my bike, I am useless.

or an abbreviation thereof:
“this is my bike, there are many like it, but this one is mine.“
or
my bike, without me, is useless. without my bike, I am useless.

*originally the rifleman’s creed – see Full Metal Jacket

Yes, I work in IT

Thorks

‘This sticker is meaningless’

‘protected by a super injuction’

‘ride one, ride off’

eyes on the pies

Beware, this sticker has sharp edges. Do not touch.

‘Caution: May become invisible when riden on the road’

Did you steal my old bike?

I made my choices, now I live with the shame!

there’s a nicer bike with just a cable lock at number 42 – steal that one

If seen off-road, call the police
I went to heaven and all I got was this crappy rapture sticker
Built by angels, ridden by demons

This is my GEAR, there are many like it, but this one is mine

RIDECAKETEAREPEAT

This bike has probably been stolen

Edit – add “please call 01929 475 833” for extra customers!

Ridden By Ryan

“I know who rode her but I can’t tell you.”

How about:

I hate STW. Bunch of middle class whiney cockbags

?

Brand Whore

I’ve had more bikes than you’ve had hot dinners.

This IS my hack bike.

Charlie Mongered Me!

if I wanted a 29er I’d have bought a ‘cross bike

it aint road tax, its VED.

Spin and Grin, Turn and Gurn

‘this is why i’m single’

‘stop reading, start riding’

‘****ing hippies!’

2:1 since time begun

‘Deraillaphobic’

‘I suffer from Deraillaphobia, but my bike looks lush’

‘i’m not a single speed rider but my gay muslamic swan is’

“One car fewer”

niche work if you can get it

It’s me or the bike… consider the divorce papers are in the post dear.