Let's have your… favourite quotes.

[gaelic] Go first through the wood but last through the bog [/gaelic]

My Gran

Mary Rose sat on a pin. Mary Rose. 🙄

Unattributed: "Sometimes you're the statue, sometimes you're the pigeon"

"A fussy man is a lonely man."

– Papa Jo 2002

The only difference between me and a mad man is a mad man thinks hes sane, where i know i am mad. Dali

She had a face like a dog lickin piss of a nettle. Anon

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

Theodore Roosevelt 1910

"science flies you to the moon, religion flies you into a building."

Dawkins

Seneca, Einstein, Wilde, Dorothy Parker, Noel Coward – all of them have coined aphorisms which stand the test of time. But truly, none of them can hold a candle to Churchill when it comes to quotes.

chocadooobie!!

"when we are no longer children, we are already dead."

Constantin Brâncu?i

stefmcdef, I fell for that hook line and sinker.

prick
x

Always carry a flagon of Whisky in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.

if at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
All W.C Fields

When the missionaries came to Africa they had the Bible and we had the land. They said "Let us pray." We closed our eyes. When we opened them we had the Bible and they had the land.

Desmond Tutu

"Beer is nature's proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy"

Benjamin Franklin

"Going about the city as I do I have come to the conclusion that there is more health about the beer drinker than there is about the picture goer"

My Granddad – quoted in the local paper c.1935

"They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist……………."

Gen John Sedgwick, 1864

"I didn't land on Plymouth Rock. Plymouth Rock landed on me." – Malcolm X

Never give way to another motorist wearing any kind of hat.

"Never rub another man's rhubarb"
Jack Nicholson's Joker in Batman

"We are all in the gutter, just some of us are looking at the stars"

"It's better to be at the bottom of a ladder you want to be on than half way up one you don't"

You, Mr Churchill, are drunk sir.

And you madam, are ugly. However in the morning I'll be sober.

Live life on the edge. Otherwise you're taking up too much space.

When Ghandi was asked what he thought about Western Civilisation he replied "I think it would be a good idea."

"I don't care what time it is, I go by tummy-time and my tummy says it's dinner time" Winston Churchill, not one of his better ones though.

If the flesh came into being because of the spirit it is a wonder.
But if the spirit came into being because of the body, it is a wonder of wonders; the wonder show of the world.
Indeed, I am amazed at how this great wealth has made its home in this poverty.

I like that one too Kenny. Have we had the one when Churchill was in the gents and left without washing his hands?
"At Eaton they taught us to wash our hands when we have been to the toilet"
"At Harrow they taught us not to piss on our hands"

'after ecstasy, the laundry'

"Don't try"

Charles Bukowski

anelka quote is not even worth this thread, he's a spoiled kid, he lack manners and to be fair he can't even play for shite.

If you want a rude quote from a french football player you shall reconsider and use eric's one.
To the national coach in the changing room when he was not happy with him
"Sac à merde"…

If in doubt, go flat out!

Colin McRae.

"The will to win is nothing without the will to prepare"

Juma Ikangaa (I think)A great Marathon runner and a quote which gets me out running when i dont feel like it?

"is this fast enough?"

Emil Zatopek making his debut at the Marathon asking it of Jim Peters, the then world record holder. Zatopek went on to win that race as well as the 5000 and 10000m!

"We can evade reality, but we cannot evade the consequences of evading reality"

Ayn Rand

"I'd rather have my ass kicked by a roomful of people than go out to this dinner… Unfortunately, no one in this room could do it."

(ex) Gen. McChrystal US Army

"No milk"

"No bread"

"Right. You go and nick some from the wards, and I'll inform Amnesty International of our plight"

Andy

"Be the trail, not the tree"

Me, 2003

Under-used England goal-machine Peter Crouch, when asked what he'd be if he wasn't a professional footballer:

"A virgin"

Andrewh; loved the "don't piss on our hands ones" So many good Churchill ones it's hard to know where to start. I think he was the one who said (about a rather unpleasant man and equally horrible woman) that "it was good of them to marry each other and make two people miserable instead of four".

God is broke,
don't end up with God,
or you'll end up in debt.

Former Dead Kennedys front man,
Jello Biafra.
High Priest of Harmful Matter

I like crouch's quote there, that's quite good.

Opinions are cheap, facts are expensive.

Another Bukowski:

"You think there's angels? Ain't it about time they f*ckin' showed up?"

Let me be clear about this. I don't have a drug problem. I have a police problem.
Keith Richards
more HERE

"Try, there is no try. There is only do, or do not" Yoda.

Excellent advice for mountain bikers everywhere

Can't remember where I heard this, and it's not strictly true for half the population, but…
"Never worry about being overtaken by a grey haired old man, keep training and one day that will be you."

And my attempt at a motivational speech to Mrs Militant as she was about to give up on a 12 hour solo ride because she thought she was near last…
"Don't think about the ten girls in front of you, think about the tens of thousands who wouldn't even attempt what you're doing."