Is a dinner party going round to friends for dinner or are we talking something formal?

Therein lies the rub…

There was a bloke at a recent dinner party I went to who had spent £3k on a bike to ride up muddy tracks? After a few minutes, others found some common ground to talk about, so he was alright….

Slowoldman – surely it’s whatever makes you feel comfortable? Horses for courses (well not literally unless we are in France)

I’m 25. If I ever get asked to a dinner party in the next 5 years it better be an incredibly thinly masked euphemism.

It’s bad enough going to the yearly school-lads-xmas pissup. Had one chump last week touting loudly how next year he reckon he will pull 40k in his recruitment job, despite the very small fact he’s only been there two months and not even passed probation yet. And that takes place in a Indian -> Pub -> Nightclub progression. Imagine not being able to escape some closet doggers living room.

“Dinner Party” it seems, is a dirty word. Probably fair enough as it dredges up connotations of the kind of dinner parties you see in adverts on TV. And adverts on TV make everything look like the worst kind of cringe-fest so it’s natural people will baulk at the idea.

However if you genuinely can’t imagine enjoying some food and booze with your friends than the problem is almost certainly with you and not the concept of sharing a meal with people.

Pretending to yourself that everybody is an idiot except you and that’s why you never lower yourself to attending such things is just lazy and a convenient excuse to be anti-social really.

My group of friends organised a dinner party type thing, where everybody cooked a dish to bring along, and we all sat down and had a nice meal with wine and candles and all that.
It was actually really nice, but after the food was done it did turn into the standard piss up (not surprising given that we’re a bunch of 18 year olds).

but after the food was done it did turn into the standard piss up (not surprising) given that we’re a bunch of 18 year olds).

It’s not just 18 year olds.

I’m early 40’s and my experience is exactly the same.

My parents are early 70’s and their’s are exactly the same.

However if you genuinely can’t imagine enjoying some food and booze with your friends than the problem is almost certainly with you and not the concept of sharing a meal with people.

Pretending to yourself that everybody is an idiot except you and that’s why you never lower yourself to attending such things is just lazy and a convenient excuse to be anti-social really.

This + 100000

The trick to hosting a good dinner party is quality soft drinks. The sober one is the most miserable by definition keep them happy and you’re on to a winner!

*often me not drinking sl i know whati am talking about.

However this afternoons dinner party will definitely involve drinkypoos!

Pretending to yourself that everybody is an idiot except you and that’s why you never lower yourself to attending such things is just lazy and a convenient excuse to be anti-social really

Pretending to yourself that everybody is an idiot except you and that’s why you never lower yourself to attending such things is just lazy and a convenient excuse to be anti-social really.

Antisocial or unsocial?

Have a loose circle of friends that hold dinner party’s/ barbecues/piss ups not a tie in sight but really good food,good wine/beer and sometimes good cigars not even held on some regular rotation just as and when ,good mix of lefties(me and the missus),Tories and even a free mason or two means lively conversation 😀

Went to one last night.

Dress was 1970s ski related (ski suits, dodgy wigs and ‘taches) and there was a hot tub for after the food.

About half a dozen couples, great fun, no discussion of house prices, investments or career advancement that I know of.

I don’t know whats wrong with the “haterz” but i love dinner parties. Its a great way to spend an evening with your friends.

Though none of my friends tend to do the bragging and stuff people have been complaining about.

They don’t really involve dressing up, other than NOT going in jogger bottoms/crocs etc…

Its doesn’t matter if you’re socially inept, just drink more wine…

Went to one last night.

Dress was 1970s ski related (ski suits, dodgy wigs and ‘taches) and there was a hot tub for after the food.

About half a dozen couples, great fun, no discussion of house prices, investments or career advancement that I know of.

Now that is my idea of hell – forced dress-up, I bloody hate it.

Come round and have a party – great….

…however, to be allowed entry, you must dress like a tit and waste at least a day finding something that shows you’ve at least put some effort into looking like a tit.

I’ll pass thanks

Just about the host one now. In honour of this thread, I have even decanted the red wine!!! 😉

All the vehicles I have owned including bikes would not get to 30k in total and there are a lot .

Antisocial or unsocial?

Sociopath.

I’m 23 me and my friends often have dinner parties sometimes before going out in town, they are very casual and relaxed affairs.

We have guests tonight, for dinner. Risotto, starters, beers wines etc.

No uniform/dress code. And I’m of brownies and fudge. Arse.

We have a tablecloth, bought one especially.

I think I just crossed the line.

God you lot sound like my dad, 😆 what happens to blokes in their 40’s that turn them into grumpy old gits

Christ but there are some miserable gits on here! While I’m not one for formal black tie, (I don’t even own a suit), if I’m invited round to friends for a meal in the evening, or we all go out to a pub or restaurant for a meal to celebrate a birthday or something I’ll jump at the chance!
I have a circle of very close friends that I’ve known for thirty-forty years, and the opportunity to sit down at a table, with plates loaded with good food, good beer and good wine, and rabbit on about a whole bunch of widely ranging subjects, while an equally wide variety of music is played in the background is one I’ll never turn down, except in certain circumstances.
I sadly missed one on Friday, a pre-Christmas meal, because it was the only evening they had available, but I’d bought concert tickets for that evening several months before.
I was very sad at missing out on what I knew would be a most convivial evening. 😐
Hopefully we’ll be able to get together for New Year.
It was our firm’s Christmas do last night, and the first I’ve been to for some years; previous ones the staff paid for, and involved loud discos, etc, so I couldn’t be arsed.
Last night the firm coughed up, and we were one of several dozen groups of people at Grittleton House, a school that hosts big dinner parties. Smart casual, black tie or fancy dress, I went smart casual, I was sat at a table with our Finance Director, in black tie, MD, some staff from our call-centre, and two girls from our accounts, none of whom I’ve ever spent any real time with.
It was excellent, I discovered all sorts of things about people I work with every day that surprised me, particularly our Finance Director, who was one of the original Hacienda crowd, went to gigs at the club that used to be in town, and was a dancer with a band that supported Radiohead in their early days!
And who was really pissed when he arrived. He’s also a surfer.
Then afterwards there were proper fairground dodgems, which I’ve got bruises down my legs from.
There were also people there from another company that I’d worked with in previous jobs, so it was great to catch up with them, too.
All in all an excellent evening, enjoyed by everyone.

@igm’s last night 😀

Pretending to yourself that everybody is an idiot except you and that’s why you never lower yourself to attending such things is just lazy and a convenient excuse to be anti-social really.
Antisocial or unsocial

Is there a difference? To clarify, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being anti-social (or unsocial) to be fair. I mean if you’re an introverted type than it would be pointless dragging yourself to dinner parties every weekend if you’d prefer to be in your house reading a book or pursuing your own hobbies and interests. There’s clearly nothing wrong with that.

People who do this because they tell themselves that everyone else in the entire world is an idiot and therefore not worth their time though, are labouring under a mis-apprehension and should probably just be honest with themselves.

God you lot sound like my dad, what happens to blokes in their 40’s that turn them into grumpy old gits

CHILDREN 😛

God you lot sound like my dad, what happens to blokes in their 40’s that turn them into grumpy old gits

CHILDREN

I was optimistic in my 20s and 30s. By the time you get to 40 life in general has ground you down to the point of cynical grumpiness. It’s made worse by 20 something’s being optimistic about everything, that and the fact you’re not allowed to gad-about-town like that anymore. Mainly down to your body not allowing you to and the recovery time being too long.

My only pleasure left in life is being grumpy.

BAH HUMBUG!

Not much since getting married. However, when I was about 18 we had one once a month. A proper 5 course, everyone dressed up. They were all nighters which descended into a massive session once the food went down(smoke too much black after a bottle of red, you’re in for a rough time). Music more drugs and lots of sex.
We do host lots of indian feasts (I’m half Indian) on festival days, everyone sat on the floor and masses of dishes to choose from.

Yep but only informal ones none of that pretentious stuff…

+1 for the optimism being ground down in yer forties 🙂

Now that is my idea of hell – forced dress-up, I bloody hate it.

Come round and have a party – great….

…however, to be allowed entry, you must dress like a tit and waste at least a day finding something that shows you’ve at least put some effort into looking like a tit.

I’ll pass thanks

This +1. I actually quite like dinner parties with close friends, and we have them and go to them at least once a month. Never an issue with dress code and all very relaxed.

Sure, every few weeks. Mates, food, drink, chat, what’s not to like? Sometimes round the kitchen table with a big order from the takeaway, other times best plates and polished glasses. Other times finger food, loud music and tobogganing down the stairs. Oh and bollox to the over 40s thing.

I think there are two ideas about dinner parties I go to the ones which involve close friends cooking food they will enjoy for each other and drinking slightly more than is credible while talking about things that interest them while any offspring pretend to be asleep upstairs should any one check . Those dinner parties are ace the mythical social torture oneupmanship ones are not.

And no one’s mentioned “country supper” yet?

+1 for the optimism being ground down in yer forties

Wait ’til you get to my age.

Well that was great fun and much better than Xfactor and strictly but shame about SPOTY.

Too much wine for a Sun night though – but worth decanting the Pasos de San Martin Granacha. Not great from the bottle, but delicious after an hour decanting. £13 but tastes much better.

Do you have Coldplay as background music, or do you pull out the big guns with a nice bit of Enya?

Dido, shurely?

We had some neighbours over for dinner only last week, it was an eclectic mix including a Pure Maths Reader from Cambridge Uni, two PhD students a single Lesbian Mum with daughter….

I thought there had been an indefinite cancellation of dinner parties since 2007/8, when house prices stopped increasing exponentially, thus robbing the middle classes of their only subject of conversation? It was just getting too awkward sitting in silence, until someone would crack, scream ‘NEGATIVE EQUITY!!!’ burst into tears, then make a lunge for the kitchen knives

Clearly they’ve started up again, but are now confined to the south east. They’ve largely been replaced by gravy wrestling up here

got the inlaws coming over tonight. will be good fun. FIL is 70 but still up for knocking back a bottle of plonk each and arguing about films / politics. I forgot to sort any kind of dessert though.

s’funny innit, people’s perception of what a ‘dinner party’ is. The idea of the formal, multiple coursed affair where people dress up and discuss house prices and golf clubs – I wonder how much that really exists? I’m 35 & have never seen one, and can’t imagine my friends doing so. Perhaps it’s a bit like the idea of the single mother with 378 kids getting £75K in benefits or whatever – a handy stereotype that’s fun to buy into but in reality, quite rare.

also yes, levels of bitter snobbery (both inverse and otherwise) on STW really quite remarkable at times! 😮

Got a family coming over for evening meal later as their kitchen is being re-done – they’re bringing washing too. Dinner Parties are quite formal things, don’t do those.

They’ve largely been replaced by gravy wrestling up here

reminds me of the bar scene in Stripes…..